jimbo: February 2008 Archives

Some of you may recall an entry I posted here a while back, where Homer, me and TJ finally got to the bottom of the wierdo from Baltimore who has been posting a fake blog and multiple fake personalities online.

Thanks to the investigative work of a blog reader, we've finally found where "Steve" from the Defying Despondency blog gets all those handsome profile pics he uses on his blog. Do a Google search for children's book author Ard Hoyt, of Texas (not Baltimore). Hot guy, but certainly not "Steve", who is actually a person named Mark Whitecotton of Baltimore.

Anyway, the pics that "Steve" uses on his fake blog were probably lifted from here, here and here where author Ard Hoyt had been photographed. Compare those pics with what you've probably seen before, and on "Steve's" profile pic as shown in the upper left corner of this screen shot taken on 2/29/2008:
"Steve"
We've learned to take screenshots of everything this fucker writes or posts, because there's a tendency for his posts and various blogs to change according to how he interprets his own history, which is remarkably fluid. I'll predict that his handsome dimpled photos will disappear from his blog and profile after today as well.

Some of you may have been approached by "Steve" under this persona, or perhaps under one of his other personae, far too many to link at the moment. His real name is Mark Whitecotton, and he's batshit crazy with a lot of time on his hands, which is a bad combination. A long and exhaustive summary of all his lies and personae can be found here (love the banner), thanks to the efforts of a group of other bloggers who want to make sure the truth is out there. Mark Whitecotton and all his fake personae also have an official heckler named Toni, the Wife of Billy Boy Dee, who is actually kinda funny.

Mark Whitecotton has dissed quite a few of my real live physical actual people friends, including Darin and Homer - and he even called TJ fat! The other day he used photos BrettCajun sent to him in confidence and under a different guise, and posted them on his blog in order to get Brettie to rescind the questioning of his various personae. I think that's called extortion but I'm not sure. And for the past month as Mark Whitecotton, under various blogs and guises, has been linking directly to my workplace website and personal information, threatening to contact my workplace if I didn't take down my accusations that he is fake. I won't. Ever. I do not respond to threats, my blog and I have always been about truth, and I will not rescind the truth.

Perhaps the real author Ard Hoyt would like to know that someone in Baltimore has been using his images under false pretense. In other words - a creepy Internet troll pretending to be other people for attention, or for I don't know what. But it would be nice if he and all 295 of his personalities would just go away. It's been getting far to easy to root them out and disprove all his lies. Sweetie, it's all about the semicolon abuse!

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Tucson.jpgWoo-hoo! I'm going to Tucson again over spring break. I initially wanted to go visit my brother in Portland, Oregon, but even with a leftover travel voucher for $300 or so, tickets were still prohibitively expensive, sometimes up to $1,000! As it was, the ticket to Tucson was more than $100 more than last year's price. Airline flights are becoming expensive, yet service and reliability has decreased. Someone's profiting I suspect.

I hope to get up to Phoenix again for some margaritas with the girls, maybe do some snowboarding north of Tucson, but most of all get some more sun. I can't complain this winter, it's been a good year for getting some extra rays.

DJ Kitty Cat scratches Purple Rain album.

Scruffy college pole vaulter. I pole vaulted in high school too!

Deamy Crown Prince Haakon of Norway in recent interview with NBC News.

Leaders Meet To Address Gang Violence In Shaw Area.

"They're fighting simply for a sense of direction. They're fighting just to be a part of something. They're fighting so people will be concerned about them," says Tyrone Parker with the Alliance of Concerned Men.

Shooting each other for attention? I think that's a stretch. No one is forcing the trigger to be pulled, there's a lot to do in DC, and a lot of it is free. So far they've only been shooting each other, but someone outside of this "part of something" is going to get shot in the crossfire some day.

But at least there's been police presence keeping watch lately. On Friday night I spotted District Commander Larry McCoy (with requisite cop 'stache) at the 7-Eleven on Rhode Island. Last night I got home late from work and counted five police cars, lights a-flashin', while walking home from the subway station. I also smelled horse poop too so a mounted unit was nearby as well. And the crack lighting unit has been at the Shaw station for at least a week.

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For all of you mean queens who say unkind things about Tilda - Renegades forwards Josh, Chris and Frank the Tank send their regards:
Hi from the Renegades forward pack
Photo by Brettie taken on 5/25/2006 at the 2006 Bingham Cup in May on Randall's Island in New York City. Good times. We are bringing two full teams to compete in the 2008 Bingham Cup in Dublin, Ireland this June.

Rugby practice starts next week on March 4th from from 6:45-8:45 p.m. at Cardozo High School, 1300 Clifton St. NW DC, hopefully to resume in a few weeks at Stead Field, located on P Street, N.W. (between 16th and 17th streets). I've been to one conditioning training and have started to run on the treadmill, and hope to get to another conditioning session on Thursday. Last Sunday we did some recruiting and socializing at Fadó Irish Pub while watching the 6 Nations rugby semifinals. I think I managed to pull in my first Renegades recruit - we'll see if the bug bites him. This Saturday, March 8 starting at 8:15am you'll see Ireland vs. Wales followed by Scotland vs. England. We'll be there, stop by and enjoy the fun and beer.

Excerpts from tonight's case study assignment on the policy and practice regarding television program-length commercials (PLCs) marketed towards children:

The question of “which came first – the toy or the show?” often guided many of the FCC rulings during the development of PLC definitions. He-Man and the Masters of the Universe and Transformers toys and action figures preceded the cartoon programs by only a few years. Conversely, many years passed before toys and product lines based on Sesame Street and Disney characters appeared on the shelves. In most cases, the FCC avoided any clear definition between these shows and products, aside from banning the airing of product advertisements related to the shows during the television programs (Colby, 1993).

In this part of the paper, I admit to being a total geek:

But children love toys, and watching them come alive on the screen constitutes entertainment. Product manufacturers cannot be blamed for stimulating the inherent imagination in a child’s mind. From personal experience, I watched the Transformers first as a television cartoon program, had a few of the toys well into my teens, and thoroughly enjoyed the 2007 feature-length live-action film based on the product line. If the product marketing was an insidious invasion of my mind, I must admit that I’ve enjoyed every minute of it.

It's for my Legal and Ethical Issues in Global Communication class, which I am enjoying. All the boring requisite classes are done, with only 3 more classes to go to complete an M.S. in management, at the rate of one class per semester. At this point I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, which is a good feeling .

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Dear Tilda:

Congrats. And no matter what all the mean homosexual fashion critics say, I know you always make the right decisions:

TildaOscars08.jpg

Except for maybe that little extra nose work that went too far...

Huge shocker at the Soviet Safeway on 17th Street tonight - while Sunday usually finds that store packed to the gills with hungry yuppies, and shelves bare as if a locust plague went through, I managed to get my victuals in a flash and headed to the "express" lane, which is rarely so. But as I approached the checkout counter, the cashier met my gaze (first oddity), established eye contact, and when I emptied my basket item by item, she snatched them as soon as she could as if they were the last groceries on the planet. My groceries were bagged before I unloaded them, somehow bending the laws of time and space. I was so startled by the unusual behavior I couldn't find my debit card for a moment. No complaints, it was just unusual.

Check out the super-scruffy Face of the Day on Andrew Sullivan's blog. Wuuuuuuuuf.

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The Old Spice Hair/Body Metrics Profiler, totally ripped off from my Body Hair Index(BHI) I created years ago.

Jason Eaton, cavemanEaton's $5000 haircut. Caveman rugger Jason Eaton sheds his locks for charity.

Catherine Tate & David Tennant of Dr. Who in a comedy sketch for last year's Comic Relief. "Bite me, alien boy!"

Wouldn't it be awesome if Project Runway's Tim Gunn was the voice of the new KITT Car on NBC's Knight Rider?

For all you communicators and graphic designers out there: Make the Logo Bigger - the song. From the muscial "We Need a Logo!" For those of you not in the profession, a request to "make a logo" makes graphic designers universally cringe. A logo is not the sole means of identity branding. Consistent use of carefully chosen fonts, colors and language is sometimes all that is necessary. Supervisors and bosses tend to ask for a logo for every program, initiative and event without much understanding of the multiple ways in which something can be branded. If communicators created a logo for everything, a brand is lost when the target audience is bewildered by a storm of logos.

Burmese pythons could colonize one-third of the USA, from San Francisco across the Southwest, Texas and the South and up north along the Virginia coast, according to U.S. Geological Survey maps released Wednesday. Soon, cheesy giant snake sci-fi movies will be a reality. I'm calling J-Lo and Ice Cube for some help against the snakes when this day comes.

File Under 'Bad Idea': Lots of Craigslist chatter last week about the new nightclub Town Danceboutique scanning the barcode on the back of driver's licenses and IDs to check birthdates with a handheld device, shown at left. Some patrons were not amused, although the practice seems to have stopped this week according to some of my sources. Joe.My.God tells me that this practice is about to become city law for all bars in NYC that have a doorman, initiated by City Council Speaker Christine Quinn.

Town management responded with an assurance that the information collected on the devices was not being recorded, used for marketing purposes, nor was the use of the device a requirement for entry. Patrons could choose to have their ID cards visually verified for date of birth.

Personally, I cringe to think that this could practice become law in any city. A bouncer or doorman's scrutiny is all that is necessary in my opinion. It's creepy stuff that gets us incrementally closer to a nanny state that knows far too much about what we do and where we go.

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420 at ISO 400
I thought we would miss the total lunar eclipse tonight in DC, as it was snowing in the afternoon. As luck would have it, the sky cleared and we got a show:
lunar eclipse
It was too cold to stay out much longer. My camera fingers were getting numb. Markie took some nice photos and put them on his Flickr page.

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Testing...do my comments work? I made a few adjustments to this blog's backend, and since then there's been no comments coming through. Or maybe no one has commented. I've noticed that the longer the post, the fewer the comments. People just don't have time to read through a page of random thoughts.

The birds are back and the sun is coming up when it should, which makes getting out of bed in the morning so much easier these days. And I'm tired at night when I should be, as opposed to wired until 3am. It all has to do with the photoperiod for me. The dark days start around the end of November, and it's not until late January where I realize I've been in a deep funk. I need to remember to recognize this as often you don't know you're in a pit until you get out of it.

That said, I've also cut back from daily downers, like one of the neighborhood e-mail listserves for example. There is just so much incessant bitching on those neighborhood e-mail lists, and very little constructive activity. You know you have a problem when an overly cynical person with seasonal mood swings is telling you that you need to lighten up. There's one guy on the list who has to gripe and groan about every. single. message. made to the listserv, no matter what the hour or topic. That ray of sunshine needs his own blog so he can complain to his heart's content rather than on an hourly basis on the listserv. Most of the time I've been hitting 'delete'. Like my friend and future good manager OMG DJ TM™ said at a meeting a while back, "If you don't have a solution, don't bring up a problem."

Anyway, I went birdwatching yesterday with a friend and a coworker. We spotted pied-billed grebes, a white-throated sparrow, ring-necked ducks, and a bluebird among the usual suspects. Neither of the birdwatchers shown below are me, I just took the picture:
counting
The weather was almost 75 by Noon, but later became more seasonal, cooler and windy.

Here is what the Cloverfield gargantua looks like. He comes with his own parasites! Isn't that cute?

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I went out to Bear night at Cobalt/30-Degrees with a friend on Friday and had a good time. "Two Floors of Fur," as Clickboo's event branding goes. The tripartite schism with the Friday night Bear crowd still persists, but that ensures more room at any of the three venues where the hairy diaspora has spread. You can only put so many bears in one place.

On Saturday I went to see Jumper at Gallery Place with friends, breaking my rule of not going to see movies at the theatres on the weekend. There are simply too many people with important text messaging to be done during the show that just can't wait, and it annoys the hell out of me. And the talking. Gallery Place is the new Union Station, heretofore written off for movies on the weekends.

After that while shopping for mouthguards, me and OMG DJ TM™ met Toby and his friend. I'll have to officially report that in real life Toby is nice and polite - his blog persona is clearly the alter ego.

Later that evening me and Skwurl went to Blowoff, which had a slightly different crowd than usual. I attribute that to the late start. We didn't spot many of the usual alternabears, and the crowd was kind of South Beach, but luckily Rich and Bob were off the hook, playing appropriately to the crowd.

I made a few attempts to say hi to a few furry strangers, but this player doesn't know the game very well it seems. Either that or people are more comfortable making connections on the Internets these days. I swear it was easier to pick someone up at a bar 10 years ago, and maybe people don't want to be seen doing that these days. Who knows. Luckily the music was good and I was having a good time dancing regardless of my failed tries.

Next week Blowoff is in NYC at the Highline Ballroom. Have fun Big Apple Bears!

At least three people I know didn't recognize me for my lack of facial hair last night. One person needed a full minute to recognize me - he honestly didn't know who I was. Tee hee! Going incognito as a cherubic doppelganger can be fun. Some say my current look makes me the "Bizarro Jimbo" from an alternate dimension, most likely the evil version. You usually expect the evil version to have a black goatee.

Notable quote from the evening:

"Ruphus can hit me in the chest as hard as he wants, but what he just doesn't understand is that I'm indestructible." - Jimbo

Seven habits of highly effective spaceship captains, evil or not.

On Wednesday, Feb. 20 there is supposed to be a total lunar eclipse between 10 and 11pm EST. I hope the sky is clear in DC for this auspicious event.

Last week’s Washington City Paper front page article is fascinating reporting about the struggles between The Washington Post newspaper vs. its evil alter ego washingtonpost.com (lowercase emphasized). It’s a long article but very descriptive in it’s coverage of the struggles between the two aspects of the same company, and resolving print vs. website copy, presentation and content.

One Mission, Two Newsrooms A river runs through the struggle for the future of the Washington Post. By Erik Wemple

Fall Photo Flashback: warming up before our last match of the season:
warm-up
Photo by SuperStar Brettie. I seem to be enjoying the dance-like nature of the exercise more than the others in the photo.

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Random Thoughts for Today:

For the record, it's officially spring - at least according to the birds. Yesterday when I left work I noticed flocks of purple grackles and American robins had returned. But it still feels like winter, that's for sure. This weekend is the Great Backyard Bird Count sponsored by the Cornell Lab of Ornithology and the Audubon Society.

The other day I was chatting with a coworker about the Presidential race, and we had to speak in hushed tones or else one of the Obamites nearby might have overheard us. We both agreed that the pro-Obama supporters are getting a little too crazed and downright creepy when they speak about him. Not that I'm anti-Obama - I'd love to hear what he has to say, it's just his worshippers who annoy me. They annoy me kind of like Mac users annoy me - all smug and smarty pants, showing a bit too much white in the eye and froth at the mouth when they speak about him. Their fanatic fervour makes me want to vote for Ralph Nader just to be a contrarian prick.

Brad Fullmer having a big 'ol 'roid rageSome hash runner douche bag left a pile of powder on our garden wall this morning. Did it occur to you to ask first? For those of you who don't know, a hash run is a retarded excuse to drink, popular in DC, where the participants run from spot to spot throughout a city and then drink afterwards. What is the fucking problem...why can't they just drink alcohol without running like normal people? I don't get it. Anyway, the retarded hash runners leave piles of flour or orange drink mix as checkpoints. I secretly hope our Q street gang gives them shit when they run down our block. Or maybe some shoes from The Shoe Tree will fall on their heads.

Another retarded thing in DC are those stupid House/Senate panel review committees, like the "Larry Craig is a Dirty Troll" committee and the "Steroids are Bad" committee. They seem to be a vehicle for our elected lawmakers to wag their fingers at people on issues that are moot or had already been ruled on months ago. This process makes the lawmaker look really virtuous. Meanwhile, they don't get any work done on the issues that are actually important to us. Douche bags on stupid senate panel committees need to retire or get to work.

On that note, if a musclequeen or professional athlete wants to juice up, shrink their balls and get all puffy and carb-faced, it's their decision, however tragic. While it sometimes can look hot, most of the time it ends up looking ridiculous in the end. After seeng extreme 'roid use in the homo set last weekend in Fort Lauderdale, I have a greater appreciation for the natural body. Puffy is appropriate for my morning breakfast cereal or doughnuts, but not for biceps or a carby face.

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Mr. Yuk
And that's all I have to say about Valentine's Day. Only one more food-related holiday (Easter) to go and we're all out of the woods in terms of food temptation since Thanksgiving.

While I can't say I smooch! DC, I've gained an appreciation for living in this town over the years. After recent vacations out of town I've found each time I'm a little more satisfied to return to the city. The guys here get a bad rap sometimes, but there is something to be said for them being washed, educated, well-traveled and clean-cut. Of course I wish there was more scruff in this town, but in the end a guy needs to be interesting and hold his own in a conversation as well.

They don't all talk about politics, or maybe I've just learned to divert the conversations to other topics. There are other industries here other than in government and politics. We've got a big tech base and of course lots of higher education institutions that employ a lot of interesting people.

When I first moved here I was continually warned that guys would always ask, "So, where do you work?" or "What do you do?" But ever since I sought advice from a career counselor, my opinion on those types of questions posed early in a conversation have moderated. If are someplace to earn a living and spend 40 hours a week doing something, it is an important facet in your life, so inquiries about it doesn't really bother me. That said, there are many in this town who do nothing else but work and don't have much else to say.

Anyway, guys here aren't so bad, but you can still get cooties from them.

Here's the cutest Valentine of them all, Josh, owner of The Mighty Jimbo:
Woof

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gull
I made it back from Florida in one piece, with no help from Midwest snowstorms that delayed the flight. Good thing I got lots of sleep on the vacation, as there wasn't much to be had last night.

Karen Black?coconutsFortunately I had the foresight to buy the book version of I Am Legend, which was a bit different than the movie. I liked the movie but after reading the story it was clear the moviemakers felt the need to produce an Americanized version of 28 Days Later, with just a nod to the work by Richard Matheson. The edition I bought also had a collection of his short stories, and I was surprised to find what inspired the Trilogy of Terror movie classic featuring Karen Black as a woman besieged by a Zuni Warrior fetish doll. The short story version is called "Prey" if you want to look it up. That movie adaptation was a lot closer to the original than the Will Smith film, which I still liked.

Some more covers, the first compliments of Michelle: Carolyn Scott & Rookie the golden retriever do Sandra Dee and Donnie Zuko at the Eukanuba Doggie Dance-Off. America's got talent but O.N-J's blood curdles.

Douche Bag John Rocker as Creed lead singer Scott Strapp feat. Hose Cansenco on backup.

Tired, trapped, but tan on the Tampa airport shuttle for a short time:
Tampa Shuttle

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...before I return to the Eternal Darkness that is Washingon, D.C.

me and Crumble

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OK bitchazzz...heres' the current shit from tha FTL:

Ultra Nate: Automatic (like a cover from the Pointer Sisters from back in tha day) ummm...hello hot model at the laptop. I loves my 80s covers;
Ida Corr vs. Fedde Le Grand - Let Me Think About It;
Punk Soul Loving Bill - If You Want To feat. woofy Sacha from Bielefeld. Not normally my bag but it's sticking in my head. I kinda like it. Music snobs take note, it rises.

Holy shit my hair is so fly I can feel the glory burning my skull. It was too long with shaggy hair in the eternal darkness of DC. There has been an awakening, thanks to Richard's Hair Salon featuring super hot and furry Dave on the cut.

I'm staying at Orton Terrace at 606 Orton Avenue. Written because this is a journal, like blogs used to be back in tha day, meant as an archive of feelings and observations. As in web journal, or web log, or blog.

A few observations:

Eyebrows are WAAAY too high around these parts. Gurl, get yourself in check with the sculpting and trimming. Personally, I like my eyebrows connected and on a tall ridge, as in Mt. Cro Magnon. If you have the perpetually surprised look, there's a problem.

Pro: They like Prince and Mary J. Blidge around here.

Con: They like Enrique Iglesias around here.

That is all.

Anole at Hugh Taylor Birch State Park. Thanks to the Farmboyz for the nature tip:
anole

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hi!

Greetings from Ft. Lauderdale!


Hi from Ft. Lauderdale!

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On Tuesday night I went over to TJs to watch Sssuper Tuesday on television. It's normally not my thing but I figured I owed him one for forcing him to see An Evening With Scott Bakula. Clyde was loveable but I re-discovered my mild allergy to short, coarse dog fur. He's cute but he congests me.

The Onion's top 20 pop-cultural obsessions even geekier than Monty Python.

"PCR, When you need to know who the daddy is." Scientist humor, but the lyrics are clever.

Jawbone Films Presents: Rugby Drinking Party. I don't quite get the advertising message they're trying to send but I get the part about drunk ruggers making out in a bar.

This vacant stare won't be on for long:
The Office
I'm off on a trip to the beach further south for some cocktails and blessed joy-giving sunlight compliments of Crumble. It's been a good year for beach trips with friends.

I trimmed the beard and when I saw it shorter I didn't like it and the jawline was all f*ed up, so I shaved it all off. This way I can maximize the amount of surface area on my body that receives sunlight.

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office posterI'm having one of those Fox Mulder weeks - except in reverse. Do you want to believe? It looks like you need to. Go ahead, believe if you have to. It seems to make you feel better.

I speak the truth but trust no one.

Speaking of Fox Mulder, while I don't have a dog, I do live a dog's life vicariously through those tear-jerking Pedigree® dog food commercials narrated by David Duchovny.

Top 3 tear-jerkers:

This entry is brought to you by Pedigree® brand dog food and David Duchovny's agent.
David Duchovny
Woof.

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ColtBrennan2.jpg
Broke again this week - the preceeding two weekends full of too much fun (and an iPod Nano replacement) tends to add up.


But at least I still have a gym membership - and today while I was chatting it up with Gurl and Bubbles at the WSC I spied The 9th Annual State Farm College Football All-Star Challenge on ESPN. I'm sorry I missed it the other 8 times, but it was a pleasure to watch, especially University of Hawaii quarterback and 2007 Heisman nominee Colt Brennan, who is thoroughly stalked by kenneth in the (212) here, here and here.

Anyway, I couldn't help but notice that a good majority of the quarterbacks had single-syllable names like Colt, Matt, Drew, Josh, Deuce (seriously), Chris, Troy, Greg and Vince. I suppose the names as shown on the program feature captions needed to be shortened for space, but a quick search on each of them shows that they all usually go by the shortened name. Aside from sounding like the first name of any random gay porn star, I thought it was an unusual coincidence.

I just finished reading Next, by Michael Crichton, a work of fiction that proposes a lot of interesting ideas about genetics. But a lot of the issues and advances in genetics that he writes about are happening right now. Things like corporate ownership of genes and patented gene sequences. Did you know that 20 percent of human genes have been patented in the United States, primarily by private firms and universities? Kinda creepy. I'd like to hope the JiM80-2 sequence, found only in my mitochondria, belong solely to moi.

One of the issues the novel touches on is the genetic predisposition of certain human behaviors, like addiction, sex drive and leadership. One character with a drug addiction problem in the book inadvertently inhales a retrovirus intended to "switch" the maturity gene in mice, thinking it was nitrous oxide or something that he could huff. The next week his addiction is kicked and he's applying for a job in a bank.

Colt BrennanAfter reading the book and watching all the single-syllable-named quarterbacks on ESPN today, I couldn't help but wonder if their skills as a quarterback were simply nurtured, or if they had a genetic predisposition for leadership, Alpha-male status or naturally gave off stud pheremones. Pheremones or some effect that made people want to refer to them with single-syllable caveman names. Perhaps the STUD-3 gene sequence is turned 'on' in these people's cells or something.

Conversely, have you ever noticed gay men with the same names refer to themselves with the multisyllabic version? Like "Michael" instead of "Mike," Matthew, Johnathan, Joshua, TJ, Andrew, Christopher, and Vincent? I believe one day they'll find out that there is indeed a gay gene, and perhaps some sociologist may figure out there's something to do with the naming of the gays and studs as well. I have no proof but it's a thought to put out there and discuss.

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