October 18, 2007
women are indeed allowed in the saliva pit
Last night the little spot in my head flared up where I got multiple sinus infections in college while I was taking scuba class. As I ascended up the water column during a test while my sinuses were clogged, something burst and I bled profusely through my nose. (You shouldn't go scuba diving with a sinus infection, fyi) From then on it always hurts a little when the air pressure is changing quickly, so I expect some rain to come through soon. Hopefully it won't dissipate into humidity and dust like all the precipitation has this fall.
This week in my favorite new advice column Ask Bob: women not allowed at Blowoff?!? Horsefeathers! I mean, at the last Blowoff there were a buncha lesbians monitoring fluid exchange in the Saliva Pit. I had no problem with it and they seemed to be enjoying themselves too. There's fun for everyone there - Saturday, Oct. 20, at the 9:30 Club.
Dammit, Chaka-Kahn is supposed to be performing at H2O in town for Howard University Homecoming, and A Year With Frog and Toad (my favorite gay couple) will be at the Strathmore. But tonight is the last practice before a very important match on Saturday, and I need to desperately grasp on to the last remnants of my masculinity the best I can, so I need to be at practice. Anyway, we're top-ranked in our division in the local union, which is very exciting because we've had some really challenging years, with some matches where we did not score a point, or others where we got up to a hundred points scored against us. These days we're not only competitive, but we're winning. The match will be at an idyllic farm in Poolesville, and I hope to get some photos.
I will be going to see Annie Lennox next week with the same bunch with whom I saw Emily, Amy, and Cyndi . It's kind of wierd how all the same artist's names end in the diminutive case. Annie better frikkin' sing because the ticket was a pretty penny.
In order to remain completely superficial and continue to degrade myself by constantly putting physical beauty on a pedistal, here is a random picture of some hot guy with a gun:
No, I don't know him and I can't remember where I found the pic and I can't refer him to you.
Happy thoughts - happy, rainier times in Homer, Alaska at the end of the rainbow:
I worked there in 1993, and visited again a few years ago when the photo was taken.
Posted by jimbo at 12:14 PM | Comments (8)
October 15, 2007
2007-2008 Ben Cohen calendar now available
The 2007-2008 Ben Cohen calendar - a wonderful gift idea for your friend who plays rugby who also loves cute scruffy furry-chested rugby players.
Commentary on yesterday's entry centered mainly on the heated debate about how to properly prepare apple pie filling, which has nothing to do with Ben Cohen but I found it amusing.
Download weekly cooking podcasts at The Splendid Table from American Public Media.
Posted by jimbo at 12:32 PM | Comments (10)
October 11, 2007
gotta be tuff with the scruff
Goddammit: Buffy the Vampire Slayer sing-a-longs cancelled by Fox.
...Fox has pulled the license for ALL their TV shows from theatrical exhibition. This is effective immediately, and of course includes Buffy and “Once More With Feeling”.
From the ShawNeighborhood listserv:
I just heard what sounded like 10 gunshots somewhere north of where I am (6th &P NW )at about 2:55 pm, followed by lots of sirens- sounds like police sirens as well as fire engines and or ambulances. Anyone have any information?Clearly, it was the 12th-Annual Shaw Skeet Shooting Tournament sponsored by the North Capitol Rod-and-Gun Club of Washington, DC. Fish fry to follow and there'll also be live entertainment (polka band!) under the beer tent. See you there.
Oh wait, I thought I was in Wisconsin.
"Gotta be tough with the scruff": MANtage by Barats and Bareta:
Cute with Chris has nice scruff today.
Not scruffy, but nice flattop - Brandon Stokley (Denver Post / Portrait by Cyrus McCrimmon):
The Broncos interviews: Brandon Stokley, by Mike Klis, Denver Post Staff Writer.
Kinda reminds me of Howie Long back in tha day: 
Redskins vs. the Packers this weekend at Lambeau steppe. It will be a no-brainer. Scruff will prevail:
Posted by jimbo at 9:50 PM | Comments (5)
October 4, 2007
OMG O.N-J has a new X-Mas album
Try to check out the new ABC television show 'Pushing Daisies' - it's a sassy, smart whodunit with a supernatural twist. It was great fun to watch with a knockout cast, featuring Emerson Cod (Boston Public), Swoosie Kurtz (Broadway, everything else) and Ellen Greene (Little Shop of Horrors, Heroes). It is promise of a clever future in television programming so catch it now before it's cancelled.
Heroes, on the other hand, suxed donkey dix last night - the only interesting part was watching Claire experiment with her powers by scissoring off her pinky toe. As for the rest of the storyline or characters, I didn't care that much. It must have been a filler episode, hopefully to prepare us for a more exciting future episode.
There was another critter incursion into the pond last night, but this time Sean said he witnessed hearing some creature "splashing around" in there when he came home from work, but was unwilling to investigate further into the matter. I asked him if it was human-sized, and he at least confirmed that it was not so big, more like the size of a breadbox. How do I stop a raccoon or possum from doing what they do?
John got Spice Girls tickets for their show in L.A. The Spice Girls are not coming to DC. I'm sending out my unit of pink special forces ninja assassins to slay John and retrieve the tickets for me.
Olivia Newton-John will be releasing a new Christmas CD, available November 1st at Target. Between O.N-J, Chaka-Kahn and Annie Lennox, it's hard to keep up with our divas these days. Thanks to Daniel for the tip. You can download your own O.N-J Xanadu desktop wallpaper from Daniel's collection here. Full track list from the album after the break.
Rough trade pic posted because I liked it. Note the subtle curl of fur at the collar.
O COME ALL YE FAITHFULL
ANGELS WE HAVE HEARD ON HIGH
EVERYTIME IT SNOWS
AWAY IN A MANGER
WE THERE KINGS
ANGLES WE HAVE HEARD ON HIGH
A MOTHER'S CHRISTMAS WISH ( Featuring Jim Brickman )
JESU, JOY OF MAN'S DESIRING
ANGELS IN THE SNOW
WHAT A CHILD IS THIS
SILENT NIGHT ( Featuring Jann Aren )
O COME, O COME EMMANUEL
ALL THROUGH THE NIGHT ( Featuring Michael McDonald )
LITTLE DRUMMER BOY
UNDERNEATH THE SAME SKY
O CHRISTMAS TREE
LITTLE STAR OF BETHLEHEM
DECK THE HALLS
INSTRUMENT OF PEACE ( Featuring Marc Jordan )
WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS
CHRISTMAS ON MY RADIO
A GIFT OF LOVE ( Featuring Barry Manilow )
Posted by jimbo at 11:06 AM | Comments (19)
October 2, 2007
is your hose long enough?
Damn, the rugby pitch was dusty tonight - I blew out a mess of grey snot when I got home. We need a nice tropical system to sit its soggy ass on the region for a few days of rain. There's even been a fall streetbox arborculture alert from the Shaw Neighborhood Listserv:
As our trees go into winter dormancy, it is critical that they are well irrigated before the leaves fall off this fall. Otherwise, they will probably not leaf out in the spring and the trees will die. PLEASE WATER YOUR TREES WITH 20 GALLONS OF WATER (ONE FULL GATORBAG) ONCE A WEEK FOR THE NEXT TWO WEEKS - THIS IS ABSOLUTELY CRITICAL TO HELP ENSURE THEIR SURVIVAL THROUGH THE WINTER. If your neighbors are away and your hose is long enough, please water their trees as well.Is your hose long enough? Please check and water as suggested.
I missed the neighborhood ECCA meeting on Monday, but apparently according to some of my readers' comments the other day my time was better spent in my boring Statistical Methods lecutre: Homophobic ECCA Pres. & Board Mock Gay Citizen. Apparently the board is run under unctuous circumstances. And not only are public computers mysteriously missing, laptops are not allowed at the meetings! I know people can be obnoxious with cell phones and BlackBerrys, but go to any modern classroom or meeting and you'll find them everywhere.
ECCA: Keeping Shaw in the Dark Ages.
Simple Rules for Peaceful City Living by DurbanBud. This morning I was almost run over by a truck who did not yield to the pedestrian with the right of way. Every day I am reminded that I'm far more likely to die in a car accident than being shot in Shaw. It's kind of a comforting thought I guess.
Superhero presidential candidate casting call, written by someone well-versed in both comic hero histories and candidates. My favorite was Al Gore as Galactus: lurking out there somewhere, feeds off the destruction of the planet to maintain his massive girth.
From BooBob - brand new Seann Scott scruffage from the film SouthlandTales:
Perhaps Seann William Scott could be assigned to foot patrol in Shaw. That would be very nice.
Posted by jimbo at 10:49 PM | Comments (10)
September 27, 2007
it's marketing thursday!
What if the sea threw the garbage back at us? A neat Smirnoff advertisement on Coolz0r, a blog about neat marketing stuff.
And from fellow scruff-obsessed Otterdoc, some weird French ad featuring ever-scrufftastic Seann William Scott staring down a lion:
OMG Duran Duran’s RED CARPET MASSACRE on Broadway at New York’s Barrymore Theatre on 47th Street, November 1 – 12, 2007. I may need to go to offset going to see Megadeth this Sunday at the 9:30 Club.
Posted by jimbo at 1:07 PM | Comments (3)
September 26, 2007
back from the beach
First off, I thinned out my water garden iris in the pond. Soaking up the previous cesspool nutrients has been good to them this summer. If you have an aquatic garden with lots of sun, and space for a pot about the size of a KFC bucket, this iris could be yours! Contact me if you meet the prerequisites and we can talk about when you can come pick up the extra iris.
Have you downloaded the new Duran Duran single 'Falling Down' yet? It sounds nice. Simon hasn't lost his voice, that's for sure.
I'm back from the beach with Delicate Flower, Clay and Martini Gurlatalova. The weather was cooperative and it was a nice getaway. Here's a few more photos:
Everyone brought their dogs:
Lemme tell ya children: the secret to eternal youth is to avoid excessive drinking, smoking and sun. There are a lot of beach residents with that leathery look that I should avoid since I tend to stay out of the sun when I can.
I managed to do some birdwatching and took photos here and there:
Lawrence Bruno Nero Dallaglio was not at the beach. I just thought this photo was hot:
I loves my ornery Dadtastic English ruggers. However, I haven't been watching much of the Rugby World Cup lately.
The black eye sure was a conversation starter at the beach. People normally don't approach me in public otherwise. Ironically the meaner, black-eyed look somehow allows a conversational 'in' that people would not consider otherwise. No complaints here. I'll have to get beat up more often.
Posted by jimbo at 8:14 AM | Comments (5)
September 21, 2007
The Saliva Pit is OVER!
OMG The Saliva Pit at Blowoff is OVER since it was mentioned in this week's print edition of MetroWeekly's Hearsay column. HearSay has a blog now, fyi.
The feature story 'Where to Live' about living in The Domestic District makes no mention of Shaw! I'm hurt...grab a lead pencil and write a bit about the lead flying through the air around here...perhaps it might sound something like this:
A walk along Q Street, NW, going east towards New Jersey Avenue will take you past several not-so-haunted houses, and you're sure to have an interesting chat with the gregarious cluster of young men always orbiting around the corner of 5th and Q. Be sure to say hi! They'll say something back at you, most assuredly. If you're a microbrew fan, try to test your knowledge of malt liquor brands littering the curbs as you peruse the bucolic dwellings on the sycamore-lined street.There's a new bad boy music venue at Titan's Ramrod this Sunday night:
Sunday September 23, 2007. 3-7 PM
$5.00 Cover Includes 1st Drink Free
$2.00 Domestic Drafts
$2.00 Smirnoff Flavors
Free Clothes Check
@ 1337 14th Street NW
Track list by Mr. Mixtake online here.
The identity of an American mummy found buried in an iron coffin in Columbia Heights has been determined.
I got elbowed in the face tonight...those damn new rugby kids and their flailing elbows...
I'm going to have a black eye at the beach this weekend! It could go in my favor depending on where I go...
Posted by jimbo at 12:16 AM | Comments (7)
September 6, 2007
The Nines
Movie still of Ryan Reynolds from the film The Nines.
The Nines consists of three short films, each featuring the same actors in different — and sometimes overlapping — roles.
Thanks to boobob for the link. I think I might want to see that film.
Posted by jimbo at 2:33 PM | Comments (6)
September 4, 2007
Jedi Bear Throwdown
DC vs. Baltimore in the Jedi throwdown of the century!
More here, from Jeff's blog, originally by Ruphus.
Betty White is sick of your shit:
Want to see something really gross? Check out how to remove botfly larva from your back. Not for the squeamish or easily nightmared. I couldn't even watch it 1/8 of the way through. I've read naturalist's accounts of similar removals - it's probably where the author of Alien got his inspiration.
Posted by jimbo at 4:48 PM | Comments (13)
August 8, 2007
'W' is for Wednesday
Walker:
Woof.
Wiggum:
Wonderful.
Wet:
Wow.
Wildenstein:
Wild!
Wildenstein photo courtesey of (c) Ann-Eve Grace Cunningham .
Posted by jimbo at 9:53 AM | Comments (13)
July 31, 2007
Declaration of Rugby Dependence
OK bitches: time for you to come out of the woodwork. Rugby is starting up again for a packed fall season, and the more who join the team, the better the practices, and the more we win. Plus, where the 'mos at?
While my team started out as mostly-gay, one day we realized that there are only so many 'mos who are willing to play rugby in one city. So we expanded our recruitment efforts throughout the 'hood to get more players. But I've noticed a drop in the number of homo teammates this season. Just an FYI: we are still accepting people who are new to the sport or those with skills transferrable from other sports. Tonight we had a former football player and a former college cheerleader. Both guys have a lot to learn, but they both have unique insight that they can bring to the team. So do you.
The team dynamics have changed over the years, and the emphasis has focused more on winning - which we have been doing a lot more of lately. And it's been fun. And rugby is a great way to stay in shape, and a hell of a lot more interesting than the treadmill at the gym.
It takes a while to get the hang of the sport. It's a lot more complicated than it looks from the sidelines. It took me a couple of years to gain confidence on the field. I have my good days and not so good days. But it's the challenge of getting over those issues and learning new skills that still appeals to me, even 7 years into the sport. I'm still learning new techniques and skills all the time.
And while you'll eventually get over stuffing your head in between sweaty men's asses, it does have its appeal:
Come and check us out. Practices are Tuesdays and Thursdays at Stead Field, behind JR's on P Street, N.W. (between 16th and 17th streets). Matches are nearly every Saturday beginning in September through mid-November.
Posted by jimbo at 10:26 PM | Comments (10)
July 30, 2007
Monday Reminders
In case I forgot to mention: Paul Rudd is dreamy:
If I haven't told you before, I've declared war on varmints. Say hello to my little friend Victor:
There was another incursion into 'The Pond' out front this weekend with some kind of critter frolicking to and from each body of water, again overturning the lily pads. So I'm introducing them to my little friend Victor. IT IS ON, MOTHAFOKKAS!!! BRING IT!!! I wasn't surprised to see that the active ingredients in mammal repellant are indeed urea (pee) and garlic oil. So my peeing to mark territory theory was not a crackpot idea - just a cheaper option. I'll have to start making more garlic pesto dinners from here on out...
Shown above is 'The Pond' out in front. The plants you see are hardy water hyacinths and robust irises. You can't see any zen lily pads because they've been destroyed by the varmints. I think I'm just going to have to give up on the lily pads. They've been overturned 5 times too many and now have no leaves. The remaining shoots struggle to survive. Fucking varmints!
Shown above is 'The Tub'. Note the muddy lip of the tub showing that some critter was going in and out of it at his/her liesure.
I wondered why this was bothering me so much over the weekend. While I would one day like to see a lily flower, I'm resigned to the fact that it's just another thing that you can't do in the city. I eventually realized that what bugs me the most about it the most is that I don't know who or what is doing it. As a former park ranger and current naturalist by hobby with a background in biology and wildlife study, I should know this sort of thing. That's why it bugs me so much. I am mostly offended by the mystery of it all.
I had a nice weekend. I geeked out on City of Heroes with upstairs Sean an awful lot, who hosted a lovely brunch on Saturday. I went to Nellie's for the first time on Saturday, and while the bartenders need to speed it up a bit, I liked the space, especially the 3rd floor deck. And there were many, many people there I've never seen before in DC. I knew it was going to fill a much-needed niche for a particular segment of the gays in DC - clearly the "kickin' back with a brew and my masc/musc/mil buds" now have a place to go. The other Sean returned from Fire Island and reports having had a good time, but I've never seen a Skwurl so tired...
Two new hottie dogwalkers identified and named this weekend: 'Silverback' kind of looks like a compact, muscular Anderson Cooper. He walks a multi-colored blue tick hound. He has nice shoulders and spiffy clothes. Then there's Air Force Jack Russell Terrier Guy, who's kinda lean and buzzcut. That brings the hottie street count census of hottie dogwalkers in Shaw to at least 8, and that's not counting shirtless runners-by. Have I reminded you that Shaw is where it's at?
Have I also mentioned that the Green Line Sux Donkey Dix? It's apparently toxic donkey dix too. Oh, that's fine, just allow your contractors to apply bird poison during business hours. I suppose it would knock off some tourist's toddler. And don't mind the dead bird carcasses. We'll just think it's West Nile and be fine with it.
Posted by jimbo at 10:50 AM | Comments (13)
June 1, 2007
pre-packing fall geek show update
The Sci-Fi Channel has announced upcoming season 4 of Battlestar Galactica will be its last:
"Galactica" will kick off in November with "Razor," an extended two-hour episode, with the rest of the season slated to run beginning in early 2008.
This is good and bad news for me. I'm glad they won't be stringing along storylines and leaving questions unanswered episode after episode like in Lost. They're trying to get somewhere and it makes sense that they'll hopefully achieve their goal in reaching Earth. But it's sad such a good show has to end.
Geek tip from Chris at BoysBriefs: A limited run six-episode Heroes spinoff, Heroes: Origins, will introduce a new character each week. At the end of the run you vote for your favorite Hero, a la American Idol.
The democratically elected character will then be added to the sci-fi drama as a regular the following year. In other words, think of this as a paranormal version of American Idol.
More proof Kylie likes Dr. Who and is a wannabe Cybergirl:
Geekery research by Kutari Prime who notes that Kylie is dressed like a Movellan Princess circa Tom baker era in the clip. Listen closely for Cybermen creator quotes.
More woofy baseball players, because it's almost summer. Geoff Jenkins of the Milwaukee Brewers:
It's amazing how inspired I am to blog when I have a whole house to pack today. I'll be away from the Internets for a while until Verizon comes to my rescue, which could be weeks, even months. Have a good summer!
Posted by jimbo at 11:40 AM | Comments (8)
May 17, 2007
Happy Syttende Mai!
OMG DJ TM™ is hawt. So is the one to his left. Photos by Joe Tresh. Grrrr!
Speaking of whores and harlots, the Washington Renegades Rugby Football Club is having a 'harlotfest' tournament this Saturday morning starting at 10ish at the field behind the Holocaust Museum*. A harlotfest is where players are somewhat randomly assigned to their team, as opposed to playing on a team they have practiced with.
It'll be one of the last easily accessible matches of the season, so come watch. Social to follow at Titan.
If that isn't butch enough for you, don't miss The Great Big International Drag King Show 007 at the 9:30 Club on Saturday night, the featured entertainment event for the Gender Public Advocacy Coalition's 2007 GenderYOUTH Leadership Summit.
*Raoul Wallenberg Field (3 blocks West of Smithsonian Metro on the Blue/Orange Line; or 15th and C St. SW between Independence Ave and Maine Ave SW Washington, DC)
Posted by jimbo at 8:07 AM | Comments (2)
April 20, 2007
hot bearded Fox Mulder in new movie
"The TV Set," is the story of a TV pilot as it goes through the Network TV process of casting, production and finally airing. But I want to see it because it features David Duchovny with a wuuufy beard:
That and it also stars SIGOURNEY WEAVER! She's actually quite funny in other roles that don't involve xenomorphic aliens that bleed acid.
Jocko is blessed by Her Unusualness. He has been sainted with the True Colors, St. Jocko of True Colors.
Posted by jimbo at 11:40 AM | Comments (6)
April 4, 2007
The 300 Hottie Factory
The 300 was bloody good fun, with cheesy lines delivered with full-testosterone action by Gerard Butler as King Lionidas. My favorite Spartan was Leonidas' short, scruffy, blond sidekick and narrator Dilios, played by David Wenham who sadly lost one of his baby blues in the battle, but kind of talks too much. But he's like a bard and narrator, so I guess I'll have to put up with his monologues in bed. TJ liked one of the cowardly Arcadians who looked like Jake Dakota's dad, apparently. While all of The 300 had nice scruff, their buff humps were not covered by fur, but still fun to look at.
So apparently Xerxes was a giant drag queen, with an army of Africans, Mongol-looking people, and lots of mean deformed people too. And he was probably the reason the Dire Rhinoceros' went exctinct since he used them in battle but the Spartans killed them all. Oh, and he had wizards with grenades, and the Spice Girls were in his orgy entourage too.
Everyone in Leonidas' army was cut, buff, bearded but with no body hair to speak of. They also had incredibly big mouths, and roared a lot too. Not that's a bad thing. And that's how The 300 went.
I was taking pictures the other day and here's one of my favorite rushes - biking through the tunnel on the Rock Creek Parkway near the National Zoo. You're supposed to walk your bike through it but that's no fun.
Posted by jimbo at 10:45 PM | Comments (6)
March 30, 2007
I was scruffy before scruffy was cool
Yay for beards abroad and at home:
Facial Hair Required for Royal Air Force Regiments in Afghanistan
DanTan Sets Beard Trend in DC?
As for the second article, I say scruff was going on long before DanTan elevated to DC Diety. Tangherlini just looks great with his beard is all, and proves you can do a good job and still be scruffy.
Phoenix was quite unusual, because by and large the gay boys there had NO facial hair at all. I saw only one other gay boy with facial hair there. I was even asked about my beard while out and about on 3 different occasions. There are far more furry hipster beards in DC, or even Tucson. But when the temperatures started rising I could understand the Phoenicians' penchant for smoothness. It gets frikkin' hot there, too hot for extra fur.
I had my first rugby practice last night, although the practices have been going on for some time. My running outside of practice has REALLY helped this year, and last night wasn't as painful as I thought it would be, except for the hardpan clay-based shitty soil of our pitch, that is. I even got a good run in during a scrimmage, and there are many new cutie pies on the team. One new youngster looks like a less-evolved (that's a good thing) version of SG-1's Daniel Jackson, but with furry arms. Me like young cavemen. Anyway, we have matches tomorrow. Don't know if I'm playing, but the weather is looking good.
Posted by jimbo at 8:28 AM | Comments (1)
March 26, 2007
vacation, woof errata
Photo by Panchesco, which captures my spring break trip to Arizona nicely:
Dogpoet in Hawaii, far more woofy than the Bradys in Hawaii. My favorite: Dogpoet's guns.
And my current Amazon.com wish list, just for kicks and to annoy Starbucks barristae: 
One more piece of woof errata: the adidas Active Skincare Sexiest Men in League contest.
Finally, Milwaukee Brewer and native Tucsonian J.J. Hardy, at spring training in Tucson:
Posted by jimbo at 7:24 PM | Comments (1)
March 19, 2007
human cognition probably takes place at an automatic level
Photo by OMG DJ TM™ of me and my dearest friend Jon being freaks together, as we do so well:
So like TJ finally calls me back, albeit on the busiest work day of the year, miraculously catching me in the office in a brief moment of lucidity from the day's madness...
Phone: ring, ring...
Jimbo: (hysterical work phone voice) "Hello! This is Jim!!!"
TJ: "OMG so like what happened at Blowoff?!?!"
Jimbo: "Umm...wouldn't you like to know, betch..."
TJ: "Oh yeah, I was in hibernation after eating some blueberries and didn't make it out of bed that day..."
Jimbo: "Yeah well nothin' really happened...I was really drunk and was hitting on this hot friend of Tos' named Jed but I think he was scared of me..."
TJ: "Well, you sounded drunk on the phone..."
Jimbo: "I was a little loud I think...the Spring Aura of Desperation is in full effect."
TJ: "So, like did anyone ask about me?"
Jimbo: "Yeah, and I told them you were dead to me."
TJ: "Well yeah but like I mean did anyone ask about me?"
Jimbo: "In passing, but Carl had Ruphus cornered the whole time at my house so I didn't really talk to either of them much, Clickboo was drunk...and Skwurl had some kind of Brazillian sugar cane Aztec buttcrack juice he made us all drink. Chrisafer and Bubbles and Aaron and Josh were there but I don't think they made it to Blowoff after my house...and a bunch of drunk rugger queens showed up too."
TJ: "But like did anyone ask about me?"
Jimbo: "Anyway, someone just burst into flames here at work so I gotta go."
TJ: "Well yeah but like I mean did anyone ask about me?"
Phone: "Bzzzz...."
This is Ruphus and Clickboo being leprechauns in my house:
Blowoff was a hoot from what I remember of it due to Skwurl's Brazillian sugar cane Aztec buttjuice drink. Spring was definitely in the air with me and other primates vying for supremacy, staging and posturing like the avian arrivals of spring. A mere hello to someone who is normally friendly while partnered becomes gruff and unresponsive while single and cruising.
So I go home for more of the same on Manhunt, noting the inordinate amount of unnatural smoothness online, a dozen or so screen names with 'masc' in the title, and wondering why guys on there are looking for dates when Match.com gets you more of that. My 90 days on there will not lead to much, I'm afraid.
Soon my tastes swing from strawberry to adorkable, especially when he tells me his thesis in 12 words or less, the unassuming lithe Jewishy entomologist and his study of mayfly nymphs and the fluid dynamics of their gill slits depending on the viscosity of seasonal water changes just gives me a boner these days...
Buncha drunk ruggers in my house too:
Posted by jimbo at 9:32 PM | Comments (4)
March 16, 2007
Blowoff this Saturday night
To end the week of hunky leprechauns I give you the art of Blowoff by Linas Garsys:
March is generally my worst work month ever, but I've been holdin' it together and keepin' a cool head at work. It helps that we have several new but very energetic and motivated coworkers to help me out.
Tonight's cool rain should give the buds a boost out there. I'm already starting to smell the dogwoods in bloom. I'll keep my gardening to a minimum this spring as I don't care to leave my efforts behind in June.
Posted by jimbo at 1:55 AM | Comments (2)
March 15, 2007
the sap is flowing
Rusty Dewees is a Vermont performance artist who does a one man show called The Logger. The image is from his 2002 calendar (March: maple syrup season). Caption for the photo: "Hey Aunt Jemima, gather this!" Photo courtesy of Boobob:
And the sap is indeed flowing in the sugar maples of West Virginia, while spring peepers (a very tiny frog in charge of announcing spring) have already been heard in Maryland. While rugby practice has started, I'll be going to my first practice tonight now that it's warmed up a bit. Here's a pic by Blogstar Brettie of me from last fall, 2nd from left, swinging my arms like an ape as I gape at the cute scrumhalf on my team:
Once, not long ago, I wore glasses. But that was before I got laser-enhanced vision, which was well worth the $2,200 per eye:
This photo was taken by BlogStar Brettie last spring at the Bingham Cup in NYC. The gentleman at my shoulder is Raimundo from Anchorage, who was clearly cruising somebody at the time.
Posted by jimbo at 8:58 AM | Comments (1)
March 13, 2007
chinstrap leprechauns
Been busy at work, too busy even to read blogs, then there's all these redhead submissions to deal with. Here's some jolly chinstrap boys filled to the brim with Guiness, courtesy of our most favorite Woof of the Week:
Other than that, grumble grumple, honey pot on fire, harrr, grrrr and other complaints.
Posted by jimbo at 10:40 PM | Comments (5)
March 12, 2007
Gay Leprechaun Insurgency Photo Challenge
UPDATE: many more leprechauns, both cute and scary, posted below.
Send me more pictures like the one below, and I'll post pictures of hot redhead leprechauns all week just for you.
Let's make it a challenge: hot scruffy shirtless redheads only, preferrably hairy and naturally-built. No 'roided out redheads please.
Now here's something not to send this week, submitted by TJ. Carrot "Top" on steroids helps me understand Skwurl's revulsion towards Daywalkers:
NOT scruffy, NOT furry, and kinda creepy.
Here's a fine example submitted by Mike at Life's a Krooz, not work safe!
Flying leprechauns are OK with me, submitted by Chuck at Howling Point:
This is what I'm talkin' about, the ever-favorite Concrete Man (Homo concretius) submitted by Jack at Fstclss Ramblings.
Scary gay redhead twins submitted by Homer.
From Boobob, a capricious kelpie - Kel*pie /'kelpe/ (noun): A water spirit of Gaelic folklore, reputed to delight in seducing and then drowning unsuspecting travelers. Straight outta Monster Manual II:
Posted by jimbo at 1:21 PM | Comments (16)
March 11, 2007
Manhunt
I did make it out to Woof on Friday after a post-work beauty nap. I'm happy to see it seems to start a bit later, as I'm normally unwilling to rush home from work and head out without a little decompression. It was ok, and at least four people raised their hands above their heads when I walked by and said, "I'm not fingering you!!!" So I guess a lot of people read Friday's entry...everyone behaved and nobodys fingers were broken.
Then we went out to Cobalt rather early, but that was OK as I'm just tuckered out by Friday. It was good to catch up with friends and listen to OMG DJ TM™ before the crowds showed up.
But before that Gurl and I had a little talk:
Gurl: "So how long has it been for you?"
Me: "I think it's been like since December, and over half a year since I've had some decent 'fur'."
Gurl: "OMG this is serious!"
So I broke down and joined Manhunt under much peer pressure, albeit without the help of the sagacious advice from The Jedi Master of Manhunt. Instead I chose to study under The Emperor.
And what they say is true - everybody is on Manhunt, and they're quite honest about what they're looking for! Some observations:
- I'm amazed at how many people online are willing to give blowjobs without reciprocation. I think that's a wonderful renewable resource.
- Next to HIV, body hair trimming remains the second greatest threat to gay society. There can't possibly be that many smooth bodies in the world.
- Again, I don't want to see a picture of your dog or you next to the Borobudur Temple in Indonesia, or wherever. Show me fur, and the rest of the goods.
- Guys, if you have to blur out your face, don't mask it using the white airbrush in Photoshop and then draw a smiley face where your head was. It frightens me. I'm going to have nightmares about cut smooth guys with blurry white smiley faces instead of a human head, chasing me down the street.
- There are a lot of guys on Manhunt complaining about being on Manhunt. I think the old wisdom our parents used to say rings true: "Go outside and get some exercise!" Fresh air will do you some good.
On Saturday the rugby team did some volunteering at the Shamrock Fest over at RFK stadium. It's basically a big festival where straight people get together to drink beer...and they drank and drank and drank. I realized that it was the straight version of a circuit party, and our communities aren't that different. Just as many straight people puke and pass out as gay people do at their venues.
Martini Gurlatalova was there too, and had an interesting observation: "...the only thing that I can use to determine if someone is gay now (in the city) is that the man is underweight."
Too true...it seems polarized in the city where you either have to be REALLY big like at Woof, or underfed and scrawny. Where's the in-betweeners in this town?
Posted by jimbo at 11:58 PM | Comments (10)
March 7, 2007
porntastic 'stache media alert
ALERT: the already woofy husband of Madonna, Guy Ritchie, has been spotted wearing a fake porntastic 'stache for Purim, some kinda crazy Jewish holiday.
Anyway, it is clear that Madonna has good taste, as always.
More hotness from across the pond, courtesy of a dellwood newsflash, Gerard Butler of The 300:
It's only Wednesday and it's already been a wooftastic week.
Most definitely not porntastic, unless it's 70's twink porntastic, from the upcoming motion picture Blades of Glory: 
Featuring Will Ferrell and Jon Heder (Napoleon Dynamite), "coming out" in theaters Friday, March 30. It looks like a hoot.
Posted by jimbo at 11:59 AM | Comments (11)
February 24, 2007
I can't wait for Easter
I know Easter is still around the corner, but this is who I'd like to have deliver my Easter Basket this year:
Please include Peeps and Cadbury Creme Eggs in the basket, preferrably served by the above gentleman.
My crazy surfing brother out west has a blog on MySpace, and he smells like cat pee.
Don't you hate it when you get a message from some hot guy in your MySpace e-mailbox, and when you read it you see that he's pimping his music/art/business? I'll pimp my friends whom I've met whose product I enjoy, but not total strangers. There's some research I came across a while back while writing a persuasion/marketing paper that basically says marketing through your personal network is a no-no and can have an equal and opposite effect than what was desired. I know MySpace tends to be more networky than Friendster and such, but I personally prefer to keep it 'just friends'. Unless it's Kelly of course.
Posted by jimbo at 9:13 PM | Comments (2)
February 19, 2007
Super-Furry President's Day Dance Party 3000
Today, just because:
"Ian Hendricks" as found on the Hairy Blokes blog where you can find a fine collection of Ben Cohen pics too.
Charlene Says Tim Hardaway's a big jackass, but we're long overdue for a man currently in a professional sport to come out. And I'm not talking about competitive diving, equestrian, or sportaerobics. There are gay men in professional football, baseball and basketball, and they just have to have the balls to face these idiots who will quickly shut up when faced with truth, rather than their own ignorant ideas of what gay people are. Anyhow, Hardaway needs to get his ass kicked by a rugby-playing Texan belle with big hair, cute nose and cherubic cheeks.
As for Hardaway's fear of being looked up and down in the locker room, it's probably already happened, but you know what? The DL-bruh probably behaved himself and kept it to himself.
Our rugby team is about half straight now. I think most of the straight guys play with us simply because our pitch (field) is in a convenient location. Convenience trumps homophobia in this case, and there have been plenty of times when we've all stripped naked in front of each other, and in rugby the straight and gay guys have to play in very, very close and intimate positions. My head has been in close proximity to hot straight sweaty man-crotch, and in more than a few occasions I've been face-to-'nads for a few moments. If these guys can handle it, so can professional athletes. The straight guys on our team got over it, other teams in our local league got over it, and so can professional athletes.
I like the term "rehabracadabra" coined by Sarah in TJs comments regarding Hardaway. It succinctly describes the current phenomenon where anyone can do or say anything, go to "rehab", and be absolved of all sins. This phenomenon kind of spits in the face of anyone who has actually been to rehab for a legitimate reason, and belittles the institution.
Posted by jimbo at 3:54 PM | Comments (7)
February 15, 2007
Paul Rudd is One Hot Primate
I wish to avoid the use of the very tired "B-word" in describing the super-sexy actor Paul Rudd. He is a handsome primate, but definitely not ursine. He is bearded and fit, and can simply be described as a sexy, bearded man, no "woof" is necessary (because my mouth would be otherwise occupied in various ways).
In this photo Paul is rocking the whole homeless NYC gnome look quite well:
I 'heart' Paul's homeless ski bum look. Look at that tuft of chest hair emerging from his collar - does it call to you as it does to me, like a dense flock of follicular sirens?
And here is Paul being a smirky, smouldering sex god:
On that note, Ryan Reynolds is now single. While I think he was worthy of the Goddess Alanis hand in marriage, it's better now that he is free to be my love slave.
I was previously in a Kelly mood today, but have since gotten over it. But my face was like this much of the day today:
Posted by jimbo at 2:54 PM | Comments (8)
February 1, 2007
I'm the Juggernaut, bitch!
I deserve some kind of recognition for maintaining focus in the gym last night. Sometimes I work out on campus where I work and not downtown, especially in the winter when it's cold, as I know how easily I can convince myself not to work out in some way or another on the commute back home before riding my bike to the gyms in DC. But despite the crowding at the campus gyms during the school year, filled with muscular and distracting proto-metrosexual students aged 18-21, I still have to go there or else I won't work out at all.
And apparently the university I work at has the highest ratio of Jewish students in the region for a public university, and at this particular gym on campus there's scruffy Jews, beefy Jews, cut Jews, wrestler Jews, Jock jews, tall Jews, lean Jews, bearded Jews, blond Jews, puppy-dog faced Jews and even red-headed Jews. Most of them are furry too. And I maintained workout focus for the entire time I was there in the face of temptation not even the devil could throw at me.
So I deserve an award. Howabout "Best Composure in the Face of Ultimate Temptation"? Them were some fine Kosher chicken in there tonight, lemme tell ya.
But there was a reason for my laser-focus tonight, as it was a very trying day at work, which always leads to a good workout. This week we underwent the redesign and migration of a very large website, which involves cleaning out old files, redesigning the important stuff, and making sure all the links work on hundreds of pages. Even with staff support and good software, it's a lot of labor that requires organization and memory. Add this to an unexpected event for next week that I'm coordinating and advertising, and a major event in March where I'm doing the same thing, plus a looming newsletter deadline on my shoulders, in addition to a new grad school class starting up (and I still don't know where class is). Needless to say my desk is filled with tasks and my e-mail box fills up by the minute. While I find a rhythm in multitasking through the day, it's not my forte and it exhausts me.
And usually I get the flurries taken care of in the morning, allowing me to work on my marketing networking, chasing professors for pictures, info and lecture titles, and putting small fires out in general. This allows me time in the afternoon to focus on the tasks that require concentration, like writing articles and media alerts, fixing web pages, restoring links, and desktop publishing - all of which require uninterrupted periods of concentration. I have this now after an office move to a more quiet area of our department, but on some days there are exceptions to this.
The new semester has started and everyone has a problem, and they come into my office telling me about it at great length with no warning. Perhaps my new aquarium fish are too relaxing to watch and causes conversational diarhea in most people. But unless it's on e-mail, during busy times like this at work my mind is a sieve and it goes in one ear and out the other.
So the second to last person to come into my office got his point across, but then he droned on and on and I couldn't even find change in my wallet correctly as the buzzing humm of his voice was scattering my brain across the cosmos. Following him was a person with a very bomastic, forcefull manner, and although he is very nice I just wasn't ready for his pure force at that time. The list of things to fix on the freshly redesigned site was growing while he was talking and there was a number of things I had to get done for the upcoming events by the end of the day as well. But like the man before him, his statements and tasks to deliver turned into a barrage of semiautomatic gunfire to my brain. Brrr-att! Brrr-att! Rrrrrattatttattattt. And he just wouldn't stop even after I told him I can't do what he wants me to do now, so please write the points in an e-mail, but he kept on going at that pace, not seeming to notice the hysterical tone rising in my voice. At such trials in my life I abruptly quiet down and drop my head as if in prayer, and my eyes shift from side to side as if seeking escape. Close friends have seen this dire moment, and know to back off. But not everyone knows they should stop what they are doing and quiet down so I can procees before I explode.
And I know I can explode easy, so I have developed the catatonic method described above to deal, but that wasn't working, and the verbal gunfire to my head wasn't stopping either. So I left my office that had become his space and walked down the hallway, not intending to stop until the blast of pain forming in my left temple would stop throbbing. I walked the length of the building, breathing deep, cooling down the wave of heat cascading over my brain.
I returned to my office and it was empty. I closed my door and sat down and logged off AOL and work e-mail to reduce distraction, and approached each task calmly and in an orderly fashion in my own physical, mental and cyber space at my desk. No one came to visit after that, and I got most of my tasks completed, or at least organized enough so I could finish it tomorrow when I'm less addled.
I got out of my office at 7pm, something I avoid getting in a habit of doing. But hell, I'm seasonally-depressed, it's winter, and working allows me to be in a state of not-depressed for a time, but I'm not saying it's a happy thing either.
I haven't felt the way I felt today since I was in college, president of both an active gay and a busy environmental campus student groups, and taking a 5-credit chemistry class in addition to ecology and calculus at the same time. Yeah, I was younger with more stamina then, but I'm equally pressed with tasks today. I know a lot of type-A gays like to load up their tasks in the same way, usually plowing through them like Juggernaut, thinking we're invulnerable and irresistable in our advance on our work, because we're fabulous and should be up to the tasks for the day, right?
But every superhero and supervillian has their Achilles' heel, and mine was found today. But at least I didn't yell out, "I'm the JUGGERNAUT, bitch!" at the chatty people in my office.
Posted by jimbo at 8:18 AM | Comments (2)
January 29, 2007
the doldrum's depths, SuperJennifer Dance Party 3000
On days like today it's hard to think of something to blog about, much less go to work. The past two months I've been withdrawn, moody, and elated at the same time. It's the seasonal blues I get this time of year, only perceptable when I come out of a funk and look back at how I was feeling. But you can't detect when you're in the bottom of a funk until you get out of it. Hard to get out of my warm comfy bed, hard to get to the gym. The depression meds have helped moderate things a bit, but even the drugs and happy lights aren't strong enough to mask all of it.
So I am glad I listened to my friend Steve (at right) when he said, "Schedule this vacation now, before you're too depressed to do it later!" And he was right. I had the foresight to schedule a trip to Costa Rica for a week in February, and I can't wait. Look for the fishbelly white spot on the Google world map when I get there. Flights to Tucson are always relatively cheap too, and I have a week off for spring break in March. We'll see how batty I'm feeling by then.
Homer asks: "Do you have a type?". Predictably, yes, so much so that close friends know how to pick 'em for me quite accurately. Personality and intellect is just as important, but it's hard to get the physical and mental to join up in one person, especially in clean-cut and conformist DC. I've really, really tried to go outside of type in the past year, and have had some really nice dates and opportunities, but I just can't beat the beast who gets his crank turned by some fur and rugged looks. Like a Rice Queen so entrenched in his Asians that he sees nothing else, I'm admittedly just as shallow in my need for fur and woof. I've tried to fight it but I think I just have to be honest with myself that it is what I like. There have been exceptions of course, but they are rare, and I'm not counting out being surprised one day by falling in love with a smooth spindly wisp of a thing. Another determinant is that I think I like the outsider type of guys, ones who don't always swim with the school. A bit freaky but able to associate with other people, but definitely has his opinions about things. And again, looking like the man to the left or Mike Rowe wouldn't hurt a bit.
I was on my best behavior Friday evening for Sqwurl's birthday dinner. I warned him in advance that Lauriol Plaza would be packed on a Friday evening, but even my most jaded predictions about how packed it would be were surpassed as it was a wall-to-wall Super-Jennifer* Dance Party 3000, none of them yet seated, most of them drunk and screechy. Deep inside I was gnashing but on the outside I was all smiles, and surprised at my ability to present such a front. Well, maybe my eyes were bugging out a bit. Someone wisely suggested that a restaurant east of 14th Street would be Jennifer-free, as they fear to tread there, and it was generally true. But there was still a 2-hour wait, made easier by the strongest margaritas I've ever had, hands-down, not even in Mexico have they been stronger. So by the time we were seated I was absolutely wasted. Then the Mexican food plus all the citrusy margarita mix gave me some bad acid indigestion that plagued me all night. Needless to say nothing much got done this weekend as I recovered and rested in my warm basement.
*A Jennifer: A rude, obnoxious, usually monied or spoiled female child of the upper middle class or upper class, who haunts city nightlife. Always seen with body-bag sized handbags and a propensity for inherited Botox face. Can't walk in heels, yet aspires to stilettos. The Bush Twins are Jennifers. Jennifers do not go to my gym, they go up north; the women at my gym could break a Jennifer by poking her with a celery stick, or that 20 lb. dumbbell. Wikipedia 'Jennifer' entry by Carl.
Posted by jimbo at 4:46 PM | Comments (5)
January 21, 2007
a view from my barred bathroom window
While not a lot of this light snow is accumulating in DC, I hope it is building up outside The District so we have a snow day tomorrow! The green stuff is my iris plants growing out of my 'pond', the Cat Factory is in the background, and can you spot the horseshoe in the photo?
I ventured out to Remington's for my first post-smoking ban trip to a bar, and it was wonderful. Some of my rugger friends met some of my bloggeratti friends and I am struck yet again at how my circles rarely meet. Matt from rugby was like, "Who's Skwurl?" and Skwurl was like "OMG like who's Matt?" Anyhow, I didn't have to take a shower when I got home, and my eyes weren't burning from smoke. It was lovely. And despite the very cold temperatures outside, The Others still huddled outside to smoke! I just don't get it.
Breeders gone wild: parents reject escalation, form organization, over birthday party extravagances. WTF? I was happy go have a roller skating party at the local roller rink with popcorn. But limos for 6 year-olds? If you think homosexuality is ruining your children, go check yourself and get back to me when your kids are 16 year-old and spoiled rotten to the core. It's bad enough that you're going crazy over high-class birthday parties for your preemie, but you have time to form a club about it? Priorities, people. I can't wait until that generation meets the Gen-X managers in the workplace. I predict a lot of entitlement issues with employees and their managers in 20 years. The self-sufficiency of the latch-key generation versus kids who have been showered with everything they want since childbirty.
I wish Old Spice really did this.
The film, Black Sheep, looks like it might be even better than Snakes on a Plane:
I am giddy with excitement about this film. I'll fly across the pond to see it if it doesn't make it to the U.S.
Posted by jimbo at 4:03 PM | Comments (6)
January 16, 2007
some guy at the gym tonight had a bleeding nipple
Well my new $80 alarm clock works just as good as my ancient one, as I ignore it just as efficiently the old one. Although I did enjoy waking up to a song chosen the previous evening, but then in my awakening state I somehow figured out how to shut it off, even though I had a tech Skwurl put it together and I have no idea how to make it not go off at 6am. But I might figure it out by this weekend.
So if I see a guy at the gym wearing a white polyester polo shirt and I see a fresh bloodstain spreading from where his nipple should be, should I say something to him? "Umm...excuse me, but your nipple got ripped off..." Miss Manners was truly perplexed and could find no words for such an event. Which crime is worse, the bleeding or the polo shirt? At least his collar wasn't popped.
Winter returned with a vengance today, and with it the super-dry air, which made my clean-shaven face all tight and dry. Part of what made me shave it was the balmy weekend weather, and it felt warm on my face. But beards keep your face cozy and moisturized too, so it's gotta come back. Plus even my coworkers complained about the clean-shaven look. Allright already!
Work Safe: from scruffy Chris who likes scruffy Ryan Gosling. I concur.
Not Work Safe: Jew Lust, the blog. I prefer my Israelis a little older, I think. And the Hairy Blokes blog. I like Leandro Dotto best with his furry butt. But most of the guys on it aren't that hairy by my standards.
This one, on the right, is just right. Wuuuuuf.
Posted by jimbo at 11:06 PM | Comments (5)
January 15, 2007
Falcon Studios presents...
...Brent Silver!
No, I'm not gonna keep it, nor the fu either. In fact, a fu is a pain in the ass to trim around, and while it got a lot of compliments, I'm slow enough as it is in the morning than to be trimming and shaving around a fu all morning.
I had a good weekend although I had to subdue myself as the sinus infection was slowing me down. I'm feeling a lot better though. Blowoff on Saturday night was a hoot, although I didn't end up going to the Sunday night dance as I was tuckered out from the previous night's fun.
Posted by jimbo at 8:21 PM | Comments (20)
January 14, 2007
a rugged-looking bunch
Here's Daddy TJ ordering everyone to purse their lips, but Tos can't purse his lips, but Steve and Jason are trying hard:
Much woofage was in my house last evening, including Daywalker Woof, Skinhead Woof, Mr. MAL Woof, and Mr. Bartender Woof:
From right to left: Lumberjack Woof, Copperred Woof, ClickBoo Woof, Mrs. Durban Woof, Mr. Bartender Woof, and again, Daywalker Woof:
Discussing the caloric value of cheese curds:
Posted by jimbo at 4:12 PM | Comments (1)
January 7, 2007
Attention-Deficit Disorder Dungeons and Dragons (A.D.D. D&D)
I think I've just found my latest hobby: join to join a local chapter of a complaints choir! It's just the thing for those with a skill for melody and lots of complaining to do, with others of the same.
Thanks to the suggestions of some readers' comments, I ordered a new alarm clock that plays music or stored sound bits from my iPod mini. My first experiment is to wake up to the sound of spring peeper frogs, then switch over to some hardcore metal/electroncia mashups. That'll do the trick. But if someone's found some really annoying Jennifer sound clips that would work too.
So much coming up next weekend, I'd better preserve my strength by the time the weekend comes. First, OMG DJ TM™ will be spinning at Cobalt on Friday night. Then Saturday night is the leather edition of Blowoff from 9:30pm - 3:00am. Due to the MAL weekend confluence with Blowoff, it'll be a big crowd, so pick your $20 tickets up at the 9:30 Club right quick. I suspect the crowd will be something like this (NOT work safe). Then in the same place at 815 V ST. N.W. DC from 10:00pm - 6:00am on Sunday night is the MAL Reaction Dance which I may skip as it's a school night as far as I know. We'll see how burnt out I am by then and give it some consideration, being that it's $30 a ticket.
I didn't do much over the weekend, choosing to relax after the holiday madness and in preparation for the coming weekend. The gang gathered for an A.D.D. D&D (Attention-Deficit Disorder Dungeons and Dragons) session and we started off trying to catch up on almost a month's worth of bar, gay, dating, holiday and neighborhood drama. In the remaining hour of time left we actually rolled a few dice. Here's what happened:
The party is going through The Mud Sorcerer's Tomb From Dragon Magazine issue #138, going after ancient treasure. But traps and great magics of antiquity are in abundance, as the Sorcerers preferred to keep their ancient secrets and goods intact. Nevertheless, here's Nodjmet of Mulhorand, a psychic warrior/sorceror attempting to use her scimitar to cut the head off a helpess cleric held in stasis, while the air genasai monk gets ready on following up with whack to her head with a crowbar. The 12-sided die represents a flaming sphere readied in case the "sleeping beauty" turns out to be undead, and the other dice are just kinda there and don't represent anything. The party prevailed at mauling the poor priest (without knowing who she was or checking alignment) just for her fine robes.
Then the micro-roleplaying sets in, as it does with a group of attention-deficit disordered gay men hyped up on soda, carbs and caffiene:
Lily the Druid: (Looks into the crypt, sees a beautiful dark-haired woman in stasis clad in flowing red robes) OMG! Look at that robe! It's fabulous!
DM (Jimbo): Umm...you're a Druid, why should you care?
Lily the Druid: Well, I need a new outfit, and the color of the robe complements my eyes. What's the thread count on that robe?
DM (Jimbo): (rolling eyes, making up stuff) It's a low thread count - under 100 - but it looks breathable in the ancient linen weaving tradition of the pre-Mulhorandi Jezulain textile guilds, very popular during the post-reckoning period of Netheril's refugee city-states. So in addition to having very powerful protective magics, it would be much sought after by modern clothiers and fabric historians as the unique weave technique allows warmth, breathability and has an exquisite feel to it.
Kal the Mage: I just want to know where that bitch put her spellbook (begins searching for secret compartments)...
Then Jon pipes in with a micro-roleplaying question:
Nodjmet (Jon): So like when I died last week, and recieved a raise dead spell from the cleric, how do I know my baby is OK? (Nodjmet the half-giant is carrying a child purportedly fathered by Scorpp the Hill Giant, a disgruntled employee from the Temple of Elemental Evil. Scorp is currently tending to the livestock in the party's keep, having been emancipated from the Temple. The child is soon to come to term...)
DM (Jimbo): Did you recieve any abdominal discomfort after your return from the dead?
Nodjmet (Jon): Umm...I don't think so, why?
DM (Jimbo): Well clearly the beneficial bacteria in your digestive system came back to life too, otherwise you would be experiencing problems digesting by today. Thus, your baby is probably also included in the package with the spell, so the child is probably OK too.
These are the things that keep gay geeks content. But not for long, since next time they have to deal with this:
Posted by jimbo at 3:52 PM | Comments (7)
December 24, 2006
have a scruffy holiday
A Scruffy Christmas to all, and to all, a good night!
Just like HairyJ above, celebrate your time away from work by not shaving. 'Tis the season to be scruffy. Fa la la la la, la la la woof.
Posted by jimbo at 12:06 PM | Comments (11)
December 22, 2006
he make good bottom
Despite a frustrating and exhausting day at work, I went out for a bite to eat at Health Bar last night with Gurl. There was much gossip to catch up with and I hadn't spent quality Gurl Time in a while. We caught up and looked at the cute Results boys passing by, and I reminded Gurl to remind me never to never go on a date at Health Bar as my eyes wander too easily.
Anyway, Gurl asked me if I would mind walking home with him and stopping by the relatively new gay bookstore down the street to pick up a few things and I said, "Muh-huh, I was thinkin' the same thing..." So we cleared up the check and went on our way...
Like some other people who live in the area, we are both entertained by the proprietor the store as he is a plentiful font of pornographic gossip and is fun to try to understand. We made our usual perusals of the wares, and Gurl finally 'popped' the question, "So do you have some of that really good stuff behind the counter..."
As our transactions were being made, Gurl pointed up to the 'New Release' rack behind the counter and commented, "Oooh...gurl, check it out: 'Ranger'!" I chuckled a little and said, "Oh, my friend TJ likes that guy, they met at Folsom."
The shopkeeper excitedly pipes up, "Oh, dey met ad Fossom! He in heere yestahday weed hees paadnuh! He have beard like you an he so shy!"
"What?!" I didn't quite understand what he said, so he repeated himself slower, with anunciation this time. I replied, "Yeah, he really likes Jake Dakota."
"Oh, he so hot and shy, he makea good bottom in porn movie."
"What?!" Again, I kinda didn't quite catch what he said, but then it started to sink in. Shopkeeper repeats himelf again: "He so hot and have-a shy face, he make a hot bottom in porn movie. I try to tehl heem dat."
Now most people don't get to hear a deep gut laugh out of me, but that's the best line I'd heard all week, and I let out a loud guffaw right there in the store.
So Gurl starts moving out of the store, and Shopkeeper says to me, "So, you like animal?"
"What?!" Again, I wasn't prepared for what I thought he just said. I replied, "Umm...I like animals as pets, in aquariums and looking at them in the outdoors..."
"No, I have someting behind counter, good deal just for you. Cute pet!" He pulls a wicker box from under the register, and I hear a soothing, trilling noise from within.
"Now, you must unnahstan tree tings: Furst - no open popper after midnight, bad ting happen when you do dat. Animal go from teddy bear to angertwink. Secon - no spill lube on animal. Bad ting happen, you get more angertwink! Tree - no turn on multi-spectrum bright light on teddy bear, he no like Happy Light..."
Posted by jimbo at 8:53 AM | Comments (16)
November 29, 2006
make wish list, anger a barrista
We all know that every time you masturbate, a kitten dies, but I want to remind you that every time you make a holiday gift wish list on your blog you anger a 31 year-old Starbucks barrista. So let's all do our part to anger barristas across the country, and like totally sell out and post your holiday wish list on your blog. I tried the whole Amazon wish list on their site but nobody could figure it out, so I'll just link to the individual items instead:- I WANT:
- DVDs of: SLiTHER, Snakes on a Plane, and The Transformers - The Movie (20th Anniversary Special Edition)
- Small Eddie Bauer Duffel (graphite color)
- Tickets to the Broadway production of Xanadu
- Dungeons and Dragons Spell Compendium
- A Spice Girls reunion
Posted by jimbo at 8:41 AM | Comments (12)
November 27, 2006
I 
cavemen
The term 'caveman' is a jimboism coined by me, meaning a rugged looking man who may or may not be furry or scruffy, but just has that look like he might hit you over the head with his club and drag you to his cave. I cavemen. Usually more fit than Bears, cavemen are definitely more scary-looking, but in a good way. One fine example is John Cena, a professional wrestler. Many professional wrestlers are 'cavemen'. Just look at that cro-mag brow!
Here's actor David Denman as his character in 'The Office'. His character is a caveman, not a Bear, because he's not too big and burly:
And Jeff of Jeff's Weather Blog is a caveman, because he's scruffy and makes me go "GRRR!" inside, and again, he's not really a Bear:
Jeff's friend Eric is a caveman too. Here's a picture of Eric with his Gucci pterodactyl-hide manpurse slung over his shoulder. In this picture, he's probably about to go kill a wooly mammoth just for fun:
Sadly for Jimbo, there are very, very few cavemen in Washington, DC. Most people here are very clean cut and evolved, and I don't often see any knuckle-draggers (as I like to call them) up on Capitol Hill. Anyone got a time machine?
And let's not forget my favorite caveman, Howie Long. Here's a pic from his ill-fated (I saw it in the theatres, it was awful) 1988 breakout action film Firestorm:
I hope this entry doesn't start some kinda micro-cultural movement that launches Caveman circuit parties and bar venues...
Posted by jimbo at 2:18 PM | Comments (31)
November 26, 2006
Wineberry Cabin
Here's our gargoyle spring water spout at the Potomac Appalacian Trail Club's (PATC) Wineberry Cabin located above the the village of Lydia, Virginia on PATC's "Vining Tract" property. I spent Saturday evening there and the sky was clear with lots of stars showing:
Originally uploaded to Jimbo3DCs Flickr account. More photos after the jump...
It was a rustic, but cozy, log cabin:
Six guys and a cute dog shared the space. This is Maya:
All we did was eat carbs:
And when night fell, we ate more carbs:
Between carbs, some people read:
And when we were done carbing up, we were ready to go:
The evening before I was kidnapped by a buncha twinks and forced to cocktail with them at 30 Degrees. I was able to break away before they went to Apex by distracting them with a cell phone text message.
Posted by jimbo at 5:33 PM | Comments (4)
November 15, 2006
a nice night at the gym
Now that rugby season is over it's back to the gym on a more regular basis. It's tough when it's dark out after work, but I know I have to keep it up to fill the stress relief vacuum left where rugby would normally burn it away. Much thanks to Joe for the Happy Light! I will install it on my wall next to the computer this weekend.
Anyway, lately I've been going to the Washington Sports Club on Connecticut, north of DuPont Circle, as the one south of the Circle has become skanky and smells of mold and stale cum, and the management there doesn't replace missing cable machine handles and stuff. Plus, these days the Kalorama WSC has been smokin' hot for some reason, filled at all hours with something nice to look at. Demographics always shift from club to club, and I move to where I'm most motivated.
So I do my back-craking and stretching exercises, then go to the upstairs deck to do my abs, because if I wait until after my workout I don't always do them. The area is crowded with Jennifers doing six million sit-ups, but waay back in the corner are two 20-something guys apparently humping each other. Interested, I move to get the sit-up device nearest to them, and set it so I can watch them humping in the mirror while I do sit-ups.
Turning off my iPod to hear what they're saying, I can tell they're doing some kind of martial art/wrestling training wearing only shorts and tee-shirts, but no shoes or socks. I did a bit of wrestling back in high school, and even some Muay-Thai kickboxing in Kazakstan, but the moves these two are doing are really unfamiliar. One guy looked Jewishy and had a hot schozz (we'll call him Jacob), and the other has a buzzed head and beard scruff (let's call him Esau). Both Jacob and Esau had furry arms and legs, so much so that they almost had Hobbitt feet. And they were almost in constant contact with each other the entire time, limiting their moves to only a 6' by 6' area of the excercise mat we were all sharing. Considering their appearance and strange grappling moves, I can only surmise that they are practicing some kind of Jew-Fu.
As I begin my set of sit-ups, counting off one...two...three...I see them linking their legs and arms together much like two queens on a couch rolling on ecstacy. Then they come closer, cheek-to-cheek, and just kinda sweat and groan together. Entranced by this close and erotic display of Jew-Fu, I lose myself in my ab set and can't stop looking...
...5,648 reps later I realize I haven't been breathing or blinking for almost ten minutes, and they combatants are still at it. The Jennifers didn't seem to notice. I could do no more sit-ups and didn't want to tent my shorts in the gym, so moved on to do my legs.
It was a good night at the gym...the Jennifers weren't even monopolizing the leg ad/abductor machines, and I completed an entire superset for my legs without anyone asking to work in. Must have been the crazed look on my face. Mmmm...Jew-Fu...
Posted by jimbo at 11:02 PM | Comments (10)
November 9, 2006
a toothy wildlife weekend
I'll be away from blogging most likely until Wednesday, as this weekend I'll be heading down to Charlotte, NC for a friendly set of rugby matches against the Charlotte and Atlanta teams. I am looking forward to it as the Atlanta guys are HOT and my frikkin' honey pot has been on fire for weeks. While there is a regional tournament up in NYC, we were just there in May and it'll be fun to head South for a change.
Anyway, speaking of getting riled up - Uncle Rufus is frikkin' hot.
After the matches and debauchery me an Chip and BlogStar Brettie are heading to Kiawah Island, in Charleston, SC. It's about a 3-4 hour drive from Charlotte, on the Atlantic coast. I may be able to see a real Diamondback Terrapin and possibly some American Alligators. I will go so far as to go out at night with a flashlight to see one. I'll try to take pictures.
Speaking of awesome terrapins, howabout them Terps? We may get to a bowl this year. Props to the quarterback whose performance has improved a lot this season. The Terps were my first college football game ever. It was a lot of fun. So I guess I am both a Packer, a Terp and a Pointer (my undergrad alma mater) as well.
I think this weekend will be absolutely insane in DC due to the election results, especially amongst The Gays. I'm almost bummed I'll be away, as I think everyone will be out partying (except uptight closeted gay Republicans of course). For those in town on Saturday, November 11th, there is much to do. My buddy OMG DJ TM™ will be spinning at Cobalt, starting at 10. And I think Blowoff at the 9:30 Club will also be a total riot. There will be stories. Have fun in my stead.
Posted by jimbo at 11:03 AM | Comments (5)
October 26, 2006
regular blogging will now resume
And now back to our regularly scheduled woof:
Screen cap of Adrian Pasdar by Fitz.
Run, Charlene, Run. Photo by Joe Tresh, who sucessfully captures the essence of the athlete as Greek god Hermes - but with Big Hair.
Kudos to New Jersey for paving the way for some kind of equality for partnered gays in the state. While it is not known whether it will be full marriage or a set of equivalent rights, it's still a step in the right direction. When I heard the news I thought, "Jersey?"
Trainer Bob is hot.
Babs say "STFU". Linky from Chrisafer.
Posted by jimbo at 8:20 AM | Comments (3)
October 24, 2006
Watch the Drag Queens, Save the World
Last night's Heroes was a hoot as usual. I really like that show. Howabout that candidate Petrelli (Adrian Pasdar) hottie? His smile is devastating, and even though he's a lean little tidbit of a man, I think he's dreamy - and the man can fly. And don't forget: if you save the cheerleader, you save the world. Huh, whaddaya know - he's married to a Dixie Chick. Me want shirtless screenshots of the man.
And if you weren't floored by last Friday's Battlestar Galactica you are probably neurologically damaged in some way. Howabout Galactica's low-atmosphere Viper fighter deployment and subsequent jump into lightspeed? WOW that was the coolest special effect I've seen in years.
Tonight is the drag race, starting at 9pm. Be there early, like 1 hour in advance at least, if you want a decent place to stand and watch. Do not call me tonight to ask where and what time it is...if you haven't caught an ad or know it by now, please don't interrupt my transformation into Charlene Hilton, the illegitemate half-sister of Paris, who was exiled to Dallas.
And if I hear the words "Grey's Anatomy" one more time I'm going to puke in the face of whoever said it. No, I will not watch it. That is all.
Posted by jimbo at 12:24 PM | Comments (18)
October 11, 2006
Happy National Coming Out Day!
OMG I'm Gay! gay, Gay, GAY! A homosexual! A fudge packer! A fudge packee! A Green Bay Packer packer (I wish)! I'm, like, totally gay. I'm so gay I'm on a published list of homos in the student newspaper at the academic institution where I work. I'm so gay I'm in print, muthafukkas.
There, I got that out of my system. I feel better. No better time than the present to celebrate such an idea as being open and honest about one's orientation, as recent events on the Hill show what closets, secrets and hubris can to a person's psyche, party and career. People have an amazing capacity for creating their own versions of reality, regardless of what actual life calls on you to do. For more insight into the secret world of closeted gay Republicans here in DC, check out the second paragraph in this insightful piece by Andrew Sullivan:
In Washington gay life, the real Republican closet cases really do seem to exist in their own little, separate social bubble. You don't see them out in gay parties, gyms, cafes, restaurants or bars much. The worst are so screwed up no one would want to socialize wth them anyway. The openly gay Republicans, in contrast, are everywhere on the social scene... In my experience, the divide in DC is not between gay Democrats and gay Republicans; it's between those who are out and those who are not.
More sound words on closets here. I came out when I saw that a gulf was growing between me and my family and friends. I was able to forsee a time where they wouldn't know me, and I didn't like that version of the future. The things I thought I had to keep quiet about where making me a mystery to both me and them - and that's just not my style. Secrets are a kind of mental constipation - and an impacted psyche is just not pretty. Eventually, it all comes out one end or another. While it was challenging managing my 'out' status at first, these days it's been no great sacrifice.
In a sad display of intolerance, students at Gallaudet University here in DC, a major sign-language academic institution, have been protesting the appointment of a non-impaired university president. Apparently similar appointments have been protested before because the candidates were "not deaf enough". A university president has to wear many hats, from spokesperson to HR to development coordinator. Administrative experience should trump the presence or absence of being able to hear, in my opinion. Talk about a quiet riot.
This quote from John Stewart made me laugh so hard I cried:
I actually feel sorry for [Ann Coulter]. Once your career is based on denigrating 9/11 widows, what's your second act? Unless you dig up Mother Teresa and stick a dildo in her eye, nothing could be more offensive,
- Jon Stewart on the drag-queen who pretends to be a conservative for money.
My Peapod grocery delivery did not come today! This is the first time this has happened. However, when they arrive with the groceries and you are not there, they leave your groceries in a crate...packed with DRY ICE! I hope I get home in time after work today and there'll be some left for me to play with.
I'm looking forward to another Blowoff this Saturday. No rugby this weekend