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October 17, 2007

Larry Craig is a big fat lying homo

This morning I was watching pieces of hott Matt Lauer's uncomfortable interview with creepy lying bathroom cruising Senator Larry Craig. It was so sad I was cringing in empathy for his wife. Senator Craig's whole family is going through a media circus in order to maintain Larry's feeble grasp on the lie that he has maintained for so many years. And it's so obvious he's a creepy lying bathroom troll, everyone knows it, and yet he is working so hard to drag his family down with him into the urinal. Craig says, "I don't approve of that lifestyle," even though he has been repeatedly caught in the seediest acts of the lifestyle he denounces. Fuck you too, Larry.

This compartmentalization, or cognitive dissonance, is common in DC. What people legislate during the day is quite different than what they do at night. Someone recently cursed me (for wearing bad footwear) to constantly have to date only uptight clean cut Republicans, but the joke is not far from the truth. You really have to watch out for these guys in this town - closetedness and tha down-low situation are at near epidemic levels in DC. Fortunately I have fairly good filters to detect such bullshit in people I date.

Conversely, an out-of-the closet acquaintance of mine was beaten by three people at the Georgia Ave./Petworth Metrorail station this week. He was in work clothes, is European, kind of slight, and a bit fey in his appearance - which of course can be interpreted as gay by certain ignorant and hateful groups of people in DC. He was not robbed, and I suspect he was beaten by these three people for sport. He's a very nice guy and this attack was seemingly random, possibly motivated by how he looks and acts.

The news of this attack, and the escalation of the cries of 'FAGGOT!' from down the block (and sometimes outside of my window) kind of makes me want to obtain a gun. I am convinced people act out what they think, and what they say reflects what they're thinking, so I take these words seriously. But guns are actually pretty heavy, and I'm sure the day I choose to leave my gun at home I'll get mugged. I'd really rather not have to carry a gun in my gym bag all the time. Knives are lighter I guess. I have a nice serrated gardening knife with a comfy rubber handle that might work better.

Gays are an easy target by those whose rights or position as a minority group are higher than the homos'. Everyone feels better with a heirarchy in place. Our moving into transitional neighborhoods is merely a symptom and one of the first stages of gentrification - but we're not the cause of gentrification. But ignorant people who are terrified of change and difference need a scapegoat, in a town where scapegoating and unloading responsibility is old hat. So it's far easier for these people to take it out on some other group. To blame gays and hate gays because they're the first sign of change. Fear of change leads to anger - anger leads to hate - hate leads to suffering and all that said Master Yoda. Even the local churches have perpetuated this hate and continue to do so.

With the awareness that I am designated as a target in my neighborhood, maybe I should think seriously about getting a gun. I used to know how to shoot a B.B. gun, .22 and a .375 H&H Magnum rifle when I worked in Alaska. But the latter is a rifle intended for killing big game but certainly an effective thought.

The calls I've made to the DC Metropolitan Police Gay & Lesbian Liason Unit have gone unanswered. And by the time I've been jumped the cops will be too late. Time to be proactive I guess. I'm not gonna go down hanging off of a fence.
thinking about guns...

Posted by jimbo at October 17, 2007 11:33 AM


Thanks, Jimbo, for showing us so eloquently that Homophobia Still Exists in Rampant Proportions! I know there's plenty of gay-supportive straight people who don't believe that gay bashing still happens in our "enlightened" age. It's one of the reasons I still live in Dupont Circle (the other one being I bought a condo in the Jurassic Era.)

Posted by: Mike at October 17, 2007 1:23 PM

I had a straight friend just get back from a conference in Alaska and he wore his collar up into the bar. He was warned by a local not to have it that way because it looked 'gay' and he would get beaten up. So he drunkenly went around to the patrons and asked if they wanted to kick his ass because of how he looked. All said no, but one said if he was gay, then he would beat up my friend.

Its ridiculous, absolutely ridiculous.

Posted by: Drew at October 17, 2007 2:32 PM

one link to save them all:
boot knives

"Gays are an easy target by those whose rights or position as a minority group are higher than the homos'. Everyone feels better with a heirarchy in place."

so so true...

Posted by: kiri at October 17, 2007 3:29 PM


Since moving to this neighborhood last year, I have thought about getting a gun and learning to shoot as well. I have small dogs, and am out at all hours walking the neighborhood. I've had the faggot threat once (i consider being called a faggot to be an obvious threat).

I know there are a number of gay people on your block. Are they also being threatened? Many people have complained on the Shaw e-m list about the group that gathers on that block. Perhaps you could get your neighbors together on that block and work to get a meeting with the police in an effort to keep that group from gathering there.

And if the cops aren't responding, get on the MPD-3D em list and complain, complain, complain, cc the mayor, the police chief, and anyone else you can think of. There's no excuse for the GLLU not getting back to you. You're being threatened.

Drop me an e-m if you need some names. I have some contacts that I know can help you get attention to this.

Posted by: Carmen at October 17, 2007 7:27 PM

You can't get a gun, but try an ASP. I usually carry mine when I'm out walking the dog at night.

Posted by: TSheehanDC at October 17, 2007 9:46 PM

Jimbo - remember - you are living in the land of taxation without representation - not Wisconsin. No gun for you. YOu can carry in Vir-gin-e-i-ay - but that's a whole different kettle of loss of civil liberties ... So sorry to hear about your friend.

Posted by: Michele at October 17, 2007 9:49 PM

I am not gay, I have nothing against gay men. I hate it when I meet an attractive woman that happens to be lesbian. No big deal, two of my best female friends are lesbians. I have even been approached by gay men, and I always politely inform the person that I do not go that way,and even through this, I can feel your pain, because of the increase of hangman's noose appearances, even at our so-called higher institutions of learning, even in blue collar areas. The authorities think that it is a joke. Do what you must to survive, but trust me, when I retire and move back to South Carolina, I will be packing heavy metal... just call me Black Metallica !! I truly believe that the DC handgun bill will be overturned, eventually. Maybe sooner that later. It is proven that the police cannot protect its citizens, it is a jungle out here with many lions and tigers and bears.Save yourself.

Posted by: jabbo613 at October 17, 2007 10:06 PM

Speaking of ASP, ASP pepper spray does well also. I don't like the thought of handling firearms outside of the home, but OC gives me some peace of mind when out and about.


Posted by: Marko at October 17, 2007 11:57 PM

I think, given Larry Craig's age, there is a touch of senility in his actions. I remember my parent's friend, who got caught in a sexual situation involving one of his grandchildren, going to jail. The whole family suffered.

Posted by: first mom at October 18, 2007 2:40 AM

Alas, to see even more homophobia from "good, upstanding Christians", there's a few aol message boards to read (yeah, I'm on aol as well and have been battling those asshats for several years now)

Posted by: Lee at October 18, 2007 2:57 AM

I am not surprised of the events you have described given the area.

And yes there is a hierarchy in regards to "Minority Status" some are "Higher on the food chain" than others. I have a unique opinion on that topic I rather not discuss publicy in this forum (I may tell you in person when next we meet)

Rob and I have not had any problems in Baltimore. Then again things are slightly different here compared to DC.
I have always felt safer in Baltimore than in DC. People pretty much leave me alone.

Posted by: Dax at October 18, 2007 9:49 AM

Jimbo- you look like you are big enough and tough enough to take care of yourself. I doubt you'd be targeted-- but you never know.

And as for Matt Lauer-- he can suck on my dirty sphincter. He went SO EASY on senator Pervy McLiarton.

Posted by: cb at October 18, 2007 10:26 AM

It's funny. I tend to be a little conservative about most things (well, as conservative as a Manhattan homo can be) until people start talking about guns. I, no joke, think they should be completely outlawed. No citizen should carry a gun. Plain and simple. There's just no reason for it, especially when so many non-lethal self-protection options exists these days (some of which were suggested above). Cops should have guns. That's it.

All that having been said, I completely understand the desire and need to feel safe in one's home and even walking down the street. That creates the conundrum, I guess.

Long story short, Jim, I don't know the answer. I do know it's not carrying a gun, though.

Wait! I got it! Ju Jitsu. THAT'S the answer. I want you to become the fiercest furry little martial arts ass-kicker in the D.C. area. That's hot. >=)

Posted by: Stephen J. Xanthos at October 18, 2007 1:28 PM

They are right, you can't own a gun in DC, to bad really i bet the murder rate would go down. Personally I wouldn't live in a city where i wasn't allowed to protect myself. If your getting paranoid there is probably a good reason.
Don't go risking your Husky good looks! and for the record, the curse was, "well adjusted republicans your family liked". Totally different than closet cases.

Posted by: Tim at October 18, 2007 1:33 PM

They should put cameras on all the street corners in DC. I would keep a police car parked there where those youths gather 24/7 to make a statement.

Posted by: brettcajun at October 18, 2007 2:07 PM

Maybe Larry Craig can go confess his queer sins to that official at the Vatican who just got busted on camera while hitting on some young guy. He claims he was just doing "research" on how homosexuality harms the church. Yeah, that's very convincing. (http://www.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20071015.wvatican1015/BNStory/International/home)

Posted by: Sean at October 18, 2007 2:29 PM

Cameras don't help, london is covered in them and they don't help solve any of their crimes

Posted by: Tim at October 18, 2007 3:41 PM

Cameras don't help, london is covered in them and they don't help solve any of their crimes

Posted by: Tim at October 18, 2007 4:12 PM

What often gets lost in the whole gun control debate is that gun control only applies to law abiding citizens. Criminals don't care about gun laws - that's why they are criminals. I've never understood why defending your own life with a firearm is equated with ignorance. I was held up at gun point in broad daylight in a transitional neighborhood and trust me - everything changed after that. Having a gun pressed against your chest will do that, I suppose. I can tell you I was not thinking about any political stance on gun control in that moment.

I'm a woman and a gun owner living in southwest Baltimore. If the police actually respond to 911 calls, it takes 22 minutes on average. That's a long time to have a potentially armed crack head rapist in your house while you wait for the police. No thanks. A shotgun is better than a rifle for home defense b/c you don't have to be accurate. And just the sound of a pump action shotgun being cycled is a deterrent all by itself.

There are a lots of classes you can take on handgun safety and home defense, both of which include range time where they provide guns for you to use. Most of my certification courses have been taught by federal cops. I think a lot of people would be surprised by how diverse gun classes are. I know I was and I'm a big ol' dyke.

Seriously, if you have any questions about gun stuff in the DC/MD/VA area, feel free to contact me off line. I'm actually taking a couple of gun virgins to the range next week. I'd be more than happy to take you and TJ on a field trip to the range. I suppose I'll have to make it to the Saliva Pit sometime and introduce myself first, unarmed of course. But I'll at least let you take a look at my CCW permit.

Posted by: anger hangover at October 19, 2007 12:19 AM

I'm headed out to a nice little gun shop in Warrenton. I've traded the collection of various long guns, and I'm getting a new Browning Over/Under shotgun. Might take up sport shooting. If you want to ride along and unload a few rounds from varous pistols I also kept, I'm always open to having company. might even be able to pick you up a small peice.

Posted by: Boo Augustus at October 19, 2007 12:30 AM

Placing a police car at the corner wouldn't be a deterrent either. Several of our shootings occurred within plain sight of a manned police car or within a few hundred feet of an officer. They don't care ....

Posted by: Rob at October 19, 2007 10:59 AM

Holy crap, you is pissed!

And, actually, you have a right to be.

Yeah, and fuck Craig. He'd sign our death warrants and then wonder why no one else was around for him to blow.

Posted by: atariageguy at October 19, 2007 11:05 AM

See such nice folk online!

Posted by: Tim at October 19, 2007 11:55 AM

I too am sick and tired of being blamed and labeled for every frigging problem in this city. It's fine to blame everything on "gentrifiers" which is equated almost ubiquitously with "faggy faggot." I'm sick of having crackheads calling the cops on me b/c I let my dog off-leash in a fenced in public park, only because I am white and gay... oh wait, maybe that is it...

We have a nasty race problem in this city. Nobody dares speak of it for fear of political suicide. But somehow it is OK for people to scapegoat gays, de-humanize them in the name of "morality" and preservation of DC's "culture."

Let's call a spade a spade... we're not being targeted because we're gay... It's because we are usually WHITE. Since you can't assail the people you hate based on RACE, you look for the next best thing, the one trump card that nobody can "argue" with... some perverse sense of "morality."

Like it or not this is a race/class issue. I hear the anti-gay calls in the streets and let's just say it ain't white rednecks from Woodbridge making them...

End rant.

Posted by: TOS at October 19, 2007 8:26 PM

Larry Craig is America's Most Repressed Homosexual. Of course he thinks he's still Mr. Republican, but you know they hate him now, and he walks around with a scarlet "H" on his forehead. Frankly, it's scary that guys like this who are so majorly fucked up in the head are running our country.

As for the guns, I'm so not there. Sorry.

Posted by: Mike at October 20, 2007 11:33 AM

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