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May 30, 2007

Pursed Lips Sink Ships

I came across Tuesday's edition of the Washington Post and at the top of page A10 was a story title that instantly made me think of TJ:

Pursed Lips in Poland Over Image of Purple Teletubby

The link goes to a related Washingtonpost.com blog article as the original is gone for some newfangled Internets reason. Like, 'pursed lips' and 'Teletubby' makes me think 'TJ', get it?!? Ha ha.

Jeez, I've been blogging so infrequently that the entries are falling off the page. My mind has been a whirlwind of tasks and chores in preparation for the move on Saturday. I found out that movers weren't as expensive as I remembered them to be. I tend to just assume everything is expensive in DC, but the price is worth it. I'll just make sure I watch the clock to ensure they bill me correctly. So like, friends who haven't called me in a while can feel safe calling me again. I won't ask you to help me move.

And I move not a moment too soon. Last night I heard the scrabbling sounds of a small mammal running around above the dropped ceiling tiles. My spiders were pissed and started lobbying me against the perils of illegal immigrants into our home. Legislation pending.

Matt MorrisI know I haven't been posting about hot hairy scruffy guys lately either. I apologize, so here's woofy baseball player Mark Hendrickson of the Dodgers. Click the photo gallery on that link for more woofiness. Woof. And here's some woofy radio host named Matt Morris, not to be confused with the woofy pitcher Matt Morris, shown at left.

Joe.My.God went to see the Broadway stage production of Xanadu. I burn inside with fierce green flames of envy.

This move and the limitations my salary brings to my housing options got me thinking that I need to get a raise. Rent has doubled but my salary has increased only by slight increments. I'm in a department that is twice the size and twice as busy as other departments that have two to three people doing what I do, with my equivalents in said departments have higher titles which correspond with higher salaries. I either need an assistant or a raise for what they're having me do what I do now. Plus I often get the feeling that I'm considered little more than a desktop publishing program, as I often have little input into what I do and do well. It's not just the salary, but the responsibilities and skills I bring to the job and want to exercise that make me feel like it's time for a chat with the boss about something called a 'reclassification' of my title. For a job that gives me nightmares, I should be earning a little more so other stressors in life aren't so threatening. If that doesn't fly then I will go elsewhere within the institution. I still want to finish my Master's degree in management so I do plan on staying within the university, since reimbursed tuition is a nice perk and I am enjoying my classes.

Posted by jimbo at 8:13 PM | Comments (6)

May 29, 2007

your flatbed for a song

Song Sparrow 2
I had a nice holiday weekend. I was in dire need of a break from work, the city and personal thoughts and it was good to go somewhere with a slower pace. I went tubing down the James River with a friend and ate lots of good food, and just kind of sat around, which was nice. Charlottesville is just close enough that the trip isn't exhausting, just far enough that attitudes are different, as is the pace. After I move, I need to get out of town again!

I've pretty much settled on moving to 4th & Q by Saturday. Currently debating movers vs. moving myself. Movers are a wonderful luxury and I really don't have that much or that far to move. But movers are also expensive, and at the rate that I move that starts to add up.

Posted by jimbo at 11:12 AM | Comments (6)

May 25, 2007

a skwurl in my attic, a troll in the basement

Happy Memorial Day Weekend! If you have a backyard barbeque during the weekend, please save a burger or two for Ann Coulter:
Cover art from Lost Empires of Faerun
I took today off - aaah, I needed that badly and a four-day weekend as well. With the impending move I'll probably take a few days off then, but there'll be some left for a summer vacation later.

I toured the latest home lead yesterday afternoon with Skwurl and Sean, who also happen to be looking for a shared 2BR unit. While we were viewing the home I noted that we would complete the triad of masc/musc/mil if we moved to this residence. I'll let you figure out who is which one. Anyway, I would conceivably take the basement unit, which was as 'cozy' as the landlord described. It even has its own spider population so I won't be lonely. I'll have to admit the upstairs is very nice, with a cute kitchen and four rooms on the 2nd floor, with a particularly sunny room facing the street that I already covet. The landlord is a gay soccer player, and not bad to look at either. I did not sleep with that landlord.

I'm encouraging Skwurl to make one of the upstairs rooms a "gaming room" with a large table with dice drawers for all our d20s. He's currently negotiating with Evil Sean on a gaming room vs. DJ studio. I mean, a gaming room idea is clearly cooler than the other idea. Anyway, there is a Gollum Hole from the basement to the 1st floor that Skwurl and Sean would occasionally drop food down for Sméagol if Sméagol is good. The place isn't 100% secured yet, but we all have good thoughts about it.

Posted by jimbo at 12:30 PM | Comments (9)

May 23, 2007

28 Weeks Later: not a good date movie

28 Weeks Later is not a good date film. And the moral of this movie is that you shouldn't be nice to people or Europe will get infected by the Rage virus. The moral of the first one, 28 Days Later, was don't be nice to monkeys. That makes a lot of sense to me. Monkeys are nasty and so are chimps.

I thought I was going to have nightmares last night after seeing the film, but apparently newsletter deadlines at work are more disturbing to me than flesh-biting enraged zombies. My work-related nightmares about rats peering at me from the air ducts have ended now that my big deadline has been met at work.

I wiped out on my bike today as I rode down the National Mall. A runner appeared from behind a tree, and I swerved on the pea gravel and landed on my shoulder and hands. A large group of tourists gathered around and I got up rather quickly and said, "I'm fine. Thank you." I think they also saw my other injuriy and thought I must do this all the time.
Purgatory
I got this stigmata (I also have a Gloriole) the same day as Jerry Falwell's funeral.
COINCIDENCE!? I THINK NOT!
I bleed for truth and justice. Let this day be a new day for My People.
Stigmata
I got a promising lead for a basement unit on Q and 4th that I will check out tomorrow. The area even has its own name-branded gang! The landlord sounds cool anyway, and the price is right. It is deeper into tha 'hood, but I was expecting to make some kind of sacrifice with the move.

Posted by jimbo at 10:49 AM | Comments (22)

May 22, 2007

leprechauns in the dust

My rugby team is composed of about 49% gay men, 49% straight men

...and two leprechauns:

do a jig

Groundbreaking research finds that if you slow down a Kylie Minogue song it sounds like George Michael. Some queens have far too much time on their hands. But I'm just jealous. Imagine if you could harness that curiosity into more scientific innovation - queens would rule the world and/or take off into space and settle down in a distant galaxy.

Posted by jimbo at 2:23 PM | Comments (6)

May 21, 2007

OMG shoes

The end result of my rusty horseshoe restoration project:
OMG shoes
Soaking them in super-steeped darjeeling tea added an interesting black patina to them, but the shoe wax just made them look greasy. They don't feel greasy though, and don't shed rust anymore.

Hunting for housing Sux Donkey Dick these days and has brought back some charming memories from past roomate situations. Like the one time I came home and a roomate was using my cherished ramen pot to melt her armpit wax. As I walked into the kitchen she was applying it right there next to the stovetop. Armpit stubble and congealing wax coated the sides of my pot. Or the guy who would drink himself unconscious over the course of the weekend until all he could do was puke blood. I'd clean blood splatters of the toilet rim most Monday mornings. I'd like to opt out of any roomate situations because of those memories. When I lived in an apartment, there were the two potheads in the unit across the hall who would get together every Saturday and smoke weed until 4am and yell "HEY MAN! YEAH, MAN! WOW MAN!" over 4,000 times in an evening. I'm not keen on apartments either.

I've come to realize I really like my spider-infested hobbit-hole basement unit on Vermont Ave. It's very quiet, close to everything, and I get a front and back yard. I like basement units.

The only non-roomate, non-apartment options within my price range are in places like Deanwood. Have you ever taken MetroRail to visit the Kennilworth Aquatic Gardens? The gardens are beautiful, but I'm not excited about living in a "transitional" neighborhood again - walking from the station to the gardens is a bit of a multicultural gauntlet.

I'm not coupled and am on a university salary, no car and work is on the Green Line. Ashburn and Sterling are not an option either. My pay is pretty good for a university salary, but DC is now affordable only for overpaid lawyers, corrupt Bush appointees, and couples who are willing to live within 5' of each other at all times. Friends who lament my exodus from the gayborhood are all in fixed-price rental situations and have no idea how things have changed in just two years. Equivalent places like where I have lived have doubled in price in two years while my paycheck has not. There is supposedly a real estate crash going on, but I think that only means flippers won't get double back anymore - just like 1.75 times the original price (waaah!), and they don't sell in a week, more like a month (waaah!). An informal survey stroll down T Street between 10th and 7th this weekend found about 5 homes for sale, 2 for rent signs and 4 other cat-factory style run-down homes. I've investigated the squatting laws in DC and that option isn't viable (or legal) either.

I like my job, and I like where I live, and I don't want to switch jobs just to be able to pay for housing. The options dwindle after that decision is made. Convenience of commuting is also a factor - I drew the line at 45 minutes max long ago - either by car or mass transit. Anything longer than that is a significant drop in quality of life. I do lots of activities downtown and I don't like the idea of going back and forth all day, especially with the MetroRail system sucking as much as it has been lately. With my last two moves I've lucked out where places have fallen into my lap in one way or another, but I have a bad feeling about this move.

Posted by jimbo at 7:50 PM | Comments (9)

May 19, 2007

A Scrum or two on the Potomac

Today we played some fun rugby in the shadow of the Washington Monument the Washington Renegades Rugby Football Club Scrum on the Potomac tournament.
Washington Monument
Photos by Gurl. Someone from the White House was totally cruising us while we were playing:
'merca
Here's me pouting (photo by OMG DJ TM) when I realized those I had invited to watch were not coming:
Where my bitches at?
"Dewey" was kind enough to join us after two on our team got injured. She played the 'hooker' position and held her own amongst the gurls and boys:
Three Amigas
"Umm...'scuse me, but that ball is mine."
"Umm...'scuse me?"
"HEY GURL! WHAT'S SHAKIN'?" That's Stefan to my right:
"Hey Gurl!"
It was a nice day for rugby, breezy and somewhat cool. Now it's time for a shower and a nap.
battle injuries
Scrape from rugby that looks a little redder without the whitening flash. I get a tetanus shot every year, but I suppose I could still contract anthrax from scraping it in the dirt.

Posted by jimbo at 6:36 PM | Comments (6)

May 17, 2007

Happy Syttende Mai!

OMG DJ TM™ is hawt. So is the one to his left. Photos by Joe Tresh. Grrrr!

Speaking of whores and harlots, the Washington Renegades Rugby Football Club is having a 'harlotfest' tournament this Saturday morning starting at 10ish at the field behind the Holocaust Museum*. A harlotfest is where players are somewhat randomly assigned to their team, as opposed to playing on a team they have practiced with.

It'll be one of the last easily accessible matches of the season, so come watch. Social to follow at Titan.

If that isn't butch enough for you, don't miss The Great Big International Drag King Show 007 at the 9:30 Club on Saturday night, the featured entertainment event for the Gender Public Advocacy Coalition's 2007 GenderYOUTH Leadership Summit.

*Raoul Wallenberg Field (3 blocks West of Smithsonian Metro on the Blue/Orange Line; or 15th and C St. SW between Independence Ave and Maine Ave SW Washington, DC)

Posted by jimbo at 8:07 AM | Comments (2)

May 16, 2007

potheads in NW DC rejoice

Evil has a new face in Washington: DCsnacks.com. Tell all your munchie-ridden friends about it and they'll be forever grateful. I was introduced to the fantastic service last week while we were watching Stargate:

Jimbo: "Gurl, I need some carbs. Do you have any carbs?"
Bubbles: "Well. Let's log on to DCsnacks-dot-com and get some!"
Jimbo: "WTF are you talking about? OMG carbs!"

They offer a $10 minimum delivery of snack food, basic pharmecuticals and all edible items of vice. So far they have a limited area of service, and don't start business until people are getting the munchies - around 8pm - but go on until 4am on the weekends. There is no reason to leave the house anymore.

The pictures of the products are the most evil part, because all you do is click on them and then they appear at your doorstep in about 30 minutes. We ordered greasy M&M cookies, insta-mac 'n cheese, and popcorn. A cute and friendly little emo chick showed up with our carbs on time and we tipped her well for her blessed service.

Gay abs are going to be devastated by DCsnacks.com.

Posted by jimbo at 11:53 AM | Comments (9)

May 14, 2007

starting rumours

This week's redesign is in honor of Syttende Mai, the Norwegian version of Cinco de Mayo, but not as much fun, and on the 17th of May. Eat pickled herring (or lutefisk if you're hardcore), practice your rosemaling and be generally stoic and unemotional. I'm trying to tap into my Nordic half but the Irish keeps seeping through.

Isn't Crown Prince Haakon a høttie? He has a bit of an adorkable element to him, and oddly hazel eyes for a Norwegian.

Thanks to all you killjoys who crushed my hopes of a Kylie Minogue appearance on Dr. Who. Can't a gay geek have a little hope? I've decided I'm going to start similar rumours:

- Olivia Newton-John joins the cast of Battlestar Galactica in Season 4 as Lucy Lawless' skinjob replacement, the most evil Cylon yet: Kira. Not even Six can contend with her fierceness;

- Stevie Nicks guest stars as a long-lost great aunt in a two-hour Charmed reunion to engage in a massive spellbattle against an evil reincarnation of Shannen Doherty;

- Whitney Houston stars in a revisit of the Touched by an Angel series as Della Reese's illegitimate crack baby, all grown up and saving souls;

- Cyndi Lauper reprises her role from Vibes as Sylvia Pickel, mentor to Patricia Arquette's character in Medium. Jeff Goldlbum makes a guest appearance.

Did anyone catch the cast of Heroes on the Today show this morning? Adrain Pasdar had a big black woofy goatee. Grrrr.

So like Hiro showed us all how easy it is to become a Kensai sword master tonight, as long as Mr. Sulu is your sensei. It's that easy. George Takei has experience you know.

Posted by jimbo at 8:55 PM | Comments (10)

May 12, 2007

Kylie + Dr. Who = massive gay/geek-out explosion

Isaac Mendez' "Burning Man" painting from HeroesThis is what happens when somebody puts the words "Olivia Newton-John" and "Battlestar Galactica" in the same sentence within earshot - I explode in a massive conflagration of gayness and geekiness.

The same catastrophe could happen in DC when I see the new Dr. Who episode featuring Kylie Minogue:

"In a Can't Get You Out Of My Tardis-tastic development, Kylie Minogue was very recently overheard by a mole at a party confirming that she is definitely going to be appearing in a future episode of 'Doctor Who'.

Now, it's hardly a secret that 'Doctor Who' has a large gay following (and no, we don't mean a flamboyant equivalent of the Comic Book Guy), or that the papers have been speculating that the teeny-tiny, cancer-surviving, boyfriend-shedding popstrel will be appearing on the show, but this is the first time there's been definite proof, and all from the brave singing budgie's own Botoxed mouth.

And what forced her to make her appearance on the show? A personal visit from Davros? A chilly encounter with the Ice Warriors? An unfortunate incident with a Dalek and its plunger? No, it's all to please her hotpant-wielding stylist, William Baker."

Original artwork from the NBC show Heroes, by comic book artist Tim Sale, who is interestingly color blind.

This is what happens when you download too much porn from the Internets:
PC crash
It is possible that this PC may have held the DNA sequnce of the infamous Goatman of Maryland.

Today I got up at an ungodly hour to participate in the International Migratory Bird Day Bird Count (Census) at The Henry A. Wallace Beltsville Agricultural Research Center in Beltsville, Maryland. I took many pictures.
National Agricultural Library (NAL)
Here is the horrid architecture of The National Agricultural Library (NAL) nearby.

The 'green' tree swallow, which nests in tree cavities or even bluebird next boxes. Its iridescent green color shifts from blue to green depending on the light situations. In utter darkness, were you able to see this bird, its colored portions would appear black. The color is from refraction, not pigment, sorta like how glacial ice appears blue.
Green Tree Swallow
A scarlet tananger, differentiated from the summer tananger by its black wings and tail:
Scarlet Tananger
A wasp or a hornet, I'm not sure, but it was very big:
Wasp
Honeybee populations are falling at an alarming rate. It’s very Children of Men (to quote Eric), but with bees. Bees perform an important service in pollinating agricultural crops. It is possible that every time you text "OMG" on your cell phone, a honeybee dies.
Honeybee Hive
At the very least, I die a little each time, especially if you text message on the dance floor.

Most of the hives were vacant.

Posted by jimbo at 7:46 PM | Comments (7)

May 11, 2007

I am obsessed with 'Masc'

Night of a Thousand Stevies promo posterYou know your graduate student might be gay when he turns in a final paper entitled, "Masculinity as a Leadership Characteristic and 'The Diva Factor' among Female Leaders." Read more after the break.

Sadly, I am going to miss this event tonight:

NIGHT OF A THOUSAND STEVIES 17:
"EDGE OF SEVENTEEN"

Presented by The Jackie Factory NYC
FRIDAY MAY 11, 2007
HIRO BALLROOM @ THE MARITIME HOTEL
371 WEST 16TH STREET NYC
DOORS OPEN 9 PM - 4 AM
$25 (plus Box Office charges)
On Sale Now at SmartTix.com or 212 868 4444

I like the promotion poster. Somebody grab me one if you attend.

MGMT 635 Leadership Term Paper, Jim Bo

‘Masculinity’ as a Leadership Characteristic and “The Diva Factor” in Female Leaders

(1) Part One: Briefly describe the theory of interest.
I was interested in the Trait approach in the studies of leadership characteristics, particularly in the frequency of the “Masculinity” trait applied to leaders that appeared in Mann’s studies, and also studies done by Lord, DeVader and Alliger. When I read the table of various trait studies in the Northouse text I thought, “What about female leaders? According to these studies, does a good female leader have to be masculine?”

According to Table 2.1, Studies of Leadership Traits and Characteristics on page 18 of Peter G. Northouse’s “Leadership: Theory and Practice” (3rd Ed.), the “Masculinity” characteristic appears on three of the five trait studies shown. Some characteristics appear once or twice, while others (Intelligence, for example) appear just as frequently. The summary of the Trait Approach is that there is a broad array of traits that define leadership that sometimes depend on the situation, or the perception of what leadership characteristics should be. One person will become a leader in everyday situations, while another will shine during a crisis. Other strengths of the approach say that there is almost a century of research to back it up, and that we should use traits as benchmarks to guide leadership efforts. The downside of the Trait approach is that the list of leadership characteristics is hard to define, does not always take situation into account, and that the “most important” leadership traits are highly subjective in nature. That said, the chapter suggests that these major characteristics include: intelligence, self-confidence, determination, integrity, and sociability.

(2) Part Two: Propose an extension to the theory. Come up with some theoretical extension not already in the theory. This can be a new proposition, application in a new situation, the addition of a variable to the theory -- whatever extension you want to make.

If, according to Mann, Lord, DeVader and Alliger, a good leader often displays masculinity, then women must have a hard time becoming a leader. However, history has produced quite a few female leaders that were effective, beloved and notorious. But did they all show masculine characteristics in their leadership styles? Could a good female leader take a feminine, or matronly approach to her duties as leader? Or is there another as yet undiscovered trait that women possess but men cannot?

Mother Theresa certainly owned the feminine title in her tireless efforts towards charity for the poor. While her requests for financial assistance towards her charitable projects were polite and respectful, she was clear in her demands: “Give until it hurts,” she would cheerfully suggest when asked how much one should give. Her words were simple and determined, and could be summarized in a Nike sportsgear advertisement: “Just Do It,” - and be like God. She was most remembered for her purity of spirit, best identified as the ‘integrity’ characteristic, in addition to being determined in her leadership efforts.

Margaret Thatcher is known to possess all of the major leadership traits, but is also known for being a tough cookie. “She was the pilot, the navigator, the bombardier, and on occasion she was the tail-gunner as well," said Robert Worcester. One journalist stated that Thatcher, like many female leaders he interviewed, often went over the top in their efforts to display toughness and other masculine characteristics.

Indira Gandhi was most remembered as ambitious, dominant and often contentious. She launched the campaign of East Pakistan/Bangladesh and supervised India’s nuclear program. It is said she ruled with an iron fist, and during her term she turned out to be strong willed, authoritarian, and even despotic in a culture that is ambivalent toward women, but by all means patriarchal. During her time as a leader she experienced personal struggles but came out of them with true grit and steely nerves. Her most notorious leadership characteristics were clearly self-confidence and determination.

The late former governor of Texas, Ann Richards, was known for her sharp wit and folksy speaking style (intelligence, sociability characteristics). She was a Democratic governor at a time when the state was increasingly Republican. She is remembered as a truly genuine person - what you saw is what you got (integrity). And like Indira Gandhi, she too experienced personal trauma on her path to leadership with a divorce and struggle with alcohol.

Hillary Clinton is widely known to be determined and brilliant, but also went through personal struggles along the way to her current position, proving to be cool in the face of a tawdry political scandal. But Clinton, like Ghandi and Richards, seemed to be able to turn these negative life experiences into political capital and kept moving onward.

I would like to propose a “Diva Factor” in the development of some female leaders, or at least the public perception of what is required of good female leader. There may be a perception that their strength must be based on some kind of situational trial by fire, a phoenix effect that legitimizes their credibility towards future greatness. This Diva Factor could be explained as a synergistic combination of three leadership characteristics: self-confidence, determination and integrity, that ultimately progresses to the ability to lead well, or the perception that they have “paid their dues and come out on top.”

(3) Part Three: Describe a real-life situation in which your theoretical extension applies. Briefly discuss the situation, and apply your theoretical extension to it.

Female leaders are freer to be more feminine than leaders before them in today’s political climate. In the case of Hillary Clinton and Germany's Angela Merkel, they are largely able to overlook their own femininity as irrelevant to the policies they champion and the positions they seek. The two are not commonly perceived to overcompensate with butch language or manly mannerisms.

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi even emphasizes the maternal qualities of her leadership over a House of Representatives in which men outnumber women 364 to 71. She is a wealthy San Franciscan who grew up in a Baltimore political family and now has reached the highest elected post of any American woman.

Today Pelosi is able to be feminine, perceived to be confident and determined, but must her integrity as a leader be proven through the Diva Factor? It may take tragedy or personal humiliation along the way, but perhaps that is what may be required to move forward in her role as leader.

Posted by jimbo at 2:41 PM | Comments (4)

May 10, 2007

doom...DOOM!

A Balrog is come!The current U.S. housing market crash reminds me of the scene in the Mines of Moria in The Fellowship of the Rings. I can hear those drums beating nearby...

Doom, doom it rolled again, as if huge hands were turning the very caverns of Moria into a vast drum. Then there came an echoing blast: a great horn was blown in the hall, and answering horns and harsh cries were heard further off.

Maggie Hardiman cringed as she heard the salesmen knocking the sides of desks with a baseball bat as they walked through her office. Bang! Bang!
"They are coming! ' cried Legolas.
"We cannot get out," said Gimli.
"Trapped! ' cried Gandalf. "Why did I delay? Here we are, caught, just as they were before."
" 'You cut my [expletive] deal!' " she recalls one man yelling at her. " 'You can't do that.' " Bang! The bat whacked the top of her desk.
Doom, doom came the drum-beat and the walls shook.
Hardiman's account is one of several from former employees of New Century that shed fresh light on an unfolding disaster in the mortgage industry, one that could cost as many as 2 million American families their homes and threatens to spill over into the broader economy.
The walls seemed to be trembling. Every now and again the drum-beats throbbed and rolled: doom, doom.
New Century has become the premier example of a group of companies that grew rapidly during the housing boom, selling working-class Americans with questionable credit huge numbers of "subprime" loans with "teaser" rates that typically rose after the first two years.

Doom, doom went the drum-beats again: they now sounded muffled and far away, but they were following.
But now, with home values falling and adjustable loan rates rising, record numbers of homeowners are failing to make their payments.

Doom, doom: the pillars seemed to tremble and the flames to quiver.
Once a little-used lending tool, subprime loans made up 20 percent, or about $600 billion, of all mortgages issued in the country last year. These loans carry a high risk of default because they generally are made to home buyers with questionable credit.
They brandished spears and scimitars which shone red as blood in the firelight. Doom, doom rolled the drum-beats, growing louder and louder, doom, doom.
But because they require borrowers to pay high interest rates, they have been a gold mine for lenders in recent years, accounting for 30 percent of all profits made in the mortgage business, according to Mercer Oliver Wyman, a consulting firm.
"Ai! ai!" wailed Legolas. "A Balrog! A Balrog is come! "
Lenders also made a fortune selling subprime loans to Wall Street. Investment banks charged huge fees for packaging them into massive bonds called mortgage-backed securities. Investors received high returns for buying and selling these bonds.
From out of the shadow a red sword leaped flaming.
But there is growing evidence that along this chain, the filters that were supposed to catch bad loans did not work.
Doom, doom, doom the drum-beats rolled behind, mournful now and slow; doom!

Posted by jimbo at 11:45 PM | Comments (7)

May 9, 2007

some résumé advice

I am no expert career counselor or business consultant, but I have just sorted through a pile of 60 résumés at work. It's the third interview committee I’ve served on since I started in my department, and I’ve been paying attention to the resumes and interviewees because I think it will come in handy some day. As a résumé reviewer I can share with you what bugs me about résumés, and some frequent mistakes:

- 8pt font is too small for old people like me. While I can see a hummingbird hump a beetle a mile away, close-up is tough and just getting tougher to read. Keep your font size to 10 or 12, Times New Roman in my opinion. After reading 60 résumés, 8pt gets really tough to read, and I’d just rather throw such a resume into the trash can. For that matter, font sizes above 14 are unnecessary as they look goofy and also take up space that could be filled with something more important;

- Keep it simple, concise and brief. Don't send your entire work history or curriculum vitae. We did not ask for that, we asked for a cover letter and résumé. More is not good in this case. You are impressing no one, long résumé are harder to sift through, and it takes a lot of time to read through it.

- I believe in the 1-page résumé. If you are concise and a good writer, you can do it. I really don’t need to know your work experience past 1997 if it isn’t relevant to the job. If you can write concisely, I’m impressed;

- I personally don’t mind unexplained gaps of time in your résumé, but I can’t say it won’t make other people worry. Either the job wasn’t relevant to position in question, or you were off “finding yourself”. Good for you, and next time bring back some Toblerone or Nutella while you’re at it;

- On the cover letter make sure your signature line does not spill onto a second page. Again, keep it one page, keep it simple, and don’t BS. Don’t be flowery or try to adore me with your writing, I just want the facts. Make sure your name and address is at the top as well, just like they told you to do when you learned about writing business letters. The reason for this is when I have a stack of resumes and I am looking for your name, I want to be able to thumb through one end or the other and still be able to find your name;

- Unless it’s in application for a design-related position, don’t get fancy-schmancy with your boxes, colors, lines or fonts. Keep it real;

- Interview committees are probably required to rate resumes according to itemized job requirements listed in the job announcement. Make sure you clearly and concisely address every requirement or duty if you can in the résumé. We are looking for key words here, so if you paraphrase what we wrote to say what you did, it helps us find this information quickly and easily, and you’ll end up getting ‘scored’ better;

- I’ll overlook a few spelling errors but not everyone is so merciful, especially if you spell your own name wrong. At least have a friend look it over before you send it;

- If you’re not done with your degree, don’t list all your coursework you’ve completed on the way to degree completion. All I want to know is if you are going for your degree or if you have completed it. I do not want to know if you quit grad school or tech school 6 years ago, and you shouldn’t say so either;

- The name of your company isn’t as important to me as your experience and accomplishments. Keep it all the same font size. Date and duration at any job is somewhat important, but not as important (to me) as what you did there;

I know some people will disagree with a few of these points, but like I said in the first paragraph, these these are my personal observations. But there is a lot of voodoo advice you hear about what to do or not to do with your resume. The easiest piece of advice is that you should put yourself in the shoes of the interviewing committee and think about what they want to see and how much time they have to go through your résumé.

Next week: how to impress me in an interview. For example, no gum-chewing (and snapping!) in the interviews.

Posted by jimbo at 1:38 PM | Comments (12)

May 7, 2007

Gamer Insurgency Threatens Hasbro Stock

Sorry about the schitzo wallpaper changes. I guess I've been in the mood for some color lately. Spice Up Your Life! The Queen is in town.

Earlier this month Paizo Publishing and Wizards of the Coast announced the conclusion of Paizo’s license to produce DRAGON and DUNGEON magazines effective September 2007. All the geeks are upset that the popular gaming supplement magazines will be discontinued, but I'm guessing some other publishing house will take up the slack. There's nothing like having mouldering hard copies of old tomes to look back into for ideas. PDFs are great, but I know I enjoy receiving my monthly geek magazine in the mailbox, and others do too.

In case you ever wondered if Duran Duran could save us from yakuza crime lords and kaiju attacks, here's proof:

I knew all it took was a flick of the wrist, and you can stop ninjas with a hi-hat. Here's the live version.

Has anyone located a clean copy of the Battlestar Galactica season finale version of Bob Dylan's "All Along the Watchtower"? I want to put it on my iPod and pretend I can hear music in the walls and have eerie suspicions that I'm a toaster. UPDATE: there will be a relsease of a Galactica soundtrack album in August to coincide with the Direct-to-DVD movie. That soundtrack will feature the BT4 version of the Bob Dylan song ‘All Along The Watchtower’.

But I want it NOW!

Ice Spiders on SciFi Channel June 9: "They throught Melrose Place had vicious backbiting. They haven't seen anything yet." It stars Patrick Muldoon and VANESSA WILLIAMS OMG OMG OMG!

One Michigan law student's offer and acceptance letter to Sauron: "It seems to me that's really two, maybe three separate offers. The first seems to be unambiguously an offer for a unilateral contract (to find the supposedly piddling ring for three of the Dwarf rings of power plus the estate of Moria), to be completed by performance. Dáin wouldn't want to bind himself to produce a ring; it's too risky. This seems like the straight-forward reward scenario envisioned as a prototypical offer for a unilateral contract."

Overheard at a gay Dungeons and Dragons gaming session, Lily the Druid (played by a gay man, of course) speaks up: "I'm gonna fuck that bitch up with my spectral Dinosaur Stampede* spell."

* Dinosaur Stampede: Lvl. 6 Druid spell, Evocation [force]; Range: medium (100 ft. + 10 ft./level).

Posted by jimbo at 9:14 PM | Comments (2)

May 6, 2007

sunny weekend fun

This weekend the team played at the North Bay Cup tournament, a small one with about 5 other teams. It was a nice day to be out playing rugby:
I, alone.
I played for Team Caveman (I forget the name) as they needed a sub, so I got to play 2 whole matches. Here, the ball is looking for someone to hold it:
Ball
They were a nice bunch, but the young bucks were tired out by their 2nd match. Grampaw Jimbo was still ready for more by the end of it.

Photos by target="blank" Crumble.

Posted by jimbo at 2:46 PM | Comments (2)

May 4, 2007

our practice pitch

Here is a photo I took last night of our practice pitch located between 17th, 16th, P and Q Streets, NW DC. I thought the colors and lights turned out pretty cool.
Practice Pitch
I was feeling ill so was not practicing.

Evidence of the pro-Crocs lobby stamping out newcomers in the horrid footwear business.

OMG a photo of an Olive Warbler I took in March got posted on the World Birds website!

Posted by jimbo at 8:33 AM | Comments (5)

May 3, 2007

Crocs Code

The Crocs Code is a modern form of signalling to others what your sexual preferences and interests are. Gay men used a similar code based on hankies and bandanas to communicate with each other in the noisy and distracting environment of gay bars. With the popularity of Crocs, today everyone can participate in this form of subcultural signaling. At the very least it is a great conversation starter. Crocs worn at work (K Street, for example) indicate you are a 'top'. Crocs worn in casual settings indicate you're a 'bottom':

CROCS COLOR WORN AT WORK (TOP) WORN AFTER HOURS (BOTTOM)
BLACK heavy SM top heavy SM bottom
GREY bondage top fit to be tied!
BLUE, Light wants head cocksucker
BLUE, Robin's Egg 69er anything but 69ing
BLUE, Medium cop copsucker
BLUE, Navy fucker (top) fuckee (bottom)
BLUE, Airforce pilot/flight attendant likes flyboys
BLUE, Teal cock & ball torturer cock & ball torturee
RED fist fucker fist fuckee
MAROON cuts bleeds
RED, Dark 2-handed fister 2-handed fistee
PINK, Light dildo fucker dildo fuckee
PINK, Dark tit torturer tit torturee
MAUVE into navel worshippers has a navel fetish
MAGENTA suck my pits armpit freak
PURPLE piercer piercee
LAVENDER likes drag queens drag queen
YELLOW pisser/WS piss freak
YELLOW, Pale spits drool crazy
MUSTARD hung 8"+ wants 8"+
GOLD two looking for one one looking for two
ORANGE anything anytime nothing now (just cruising)
APRICOT two tons o' fun chubby chaser
CORAL suck my toes shrimper (sucks toes)
RUST a cowboy the horse
FUSCHIA spanker spankee
GREEN, Kelly hustler (for rent) john (looking to buy)
GREEN, Hunter daddy orphan boy looking for daddy
OLIVE DRAB military top military bottom
GREEN, Lime dines off tricks (food) dinner plate (will buy dinner)
BEIGE rimmer rim me
BROWN scat top scat bottom
CHARCOAL latex fetish top latex fetish bottom
WHITE beat my meat (J/O) I'll do us both (J/O)
CREAM cums in condoms sucks cum out of condoms
RED furry bear likes bears
TAN smokes cigars likes cigars
PUCE outdoor sex top outdoor sex bottom

Posted by jimbo at 2:20 PM | Comments (23)

May 2, 2007

The Green Line Sux Donkey Dick

Le-Petit-Socialiste - inspired by Pierre et GillesThings just haven't been the same since some guy took over DanTan's job at WMATA. In a nutshell, the Green Line has Sux Donkey Dick ever since they extended the Yellow Line to the Fort Totten station.

Now I understand there might be some problems when you add a new service to an existing system, but this ain't rocket science and you don't need to hire a systems engineer to figure out how to fix things. It's been several months since the change in routes and they've only just updated the lcd displays to let us GreenLiners know when the next train is coming. As for the rest, you would think WMATA was in league with the infernal legions of hell, bent on tormenting the travelling public for as long as possible.

I would have rolled with it this evening if I wasn't taking some aquarium fish home via MetroRail. Next time I'll try to take a more reliable way home when the fishies are running out of oxygen in the plastic baggie. First they send a set of cars through without opening the doors. Then they have the cars sit there just outside the station for minutes on end as a few other trains go by. Then the blinky lights on the platform go on when there's no trains in sight, blinking presumably just to torment you - just as Satan commands. When a promising train does start to approach the station, it stops just a dozen feet away from the platform to torment you further.

The same kind of torment happens on the way to the College Park station from DC. You can either take the Yellow Line to Ft. Totten and get off, or you can take the Green Line which will stop for untold minutes at the same station for no reason. Then it stops just before the next few stations on the way north so you can enjoy wildlife viewing. On the bright side, I have seen white-tailed deer and even a red fox during these waiting periods. Anyway, in accordance with the Edicts of Torment from the bowels of hell, the train will stop just before the College Park station platform for a while. And when it finally gets to the College Park station platform the demons driving the train see fit to have the train wait there too, as you stand at the doors waiting for them to open, powerless against the malign forces of the Abyss. What is normally a 30-40 minute commute for me has become closer to an hour on an average ride to work due to these pointless and long-standing delays. Oh, and 2 fish died. Thanks, WMATA.

In summary, WMATA needs to get a clue and go by a simple request from the majority of its passengers:

"Please, just take me home."

That's all I'm asking for my tax dollars.

St. Metrorailus, with Gloriole

- Jimbo St. MetroRailus, Patron Saint of Suffering Commuters.

Posted by jimbo at 8:20 AM | Comments (29)

May 1, 2007

mean streak

So I was running on the National Mall yesterday with my masc/musc/mil running "bud" Skwurl and he like says I get gayface when I run up stairs during a run. Whatever.

Anyway, the hyper rodent's encouragement to run my ass up the stairs of the Lincoln Memorial was rewarding. I had never actually been up there near Abe's crotch. The view was indeed inspiring - of the Reflecting Pool that is. Too bad I was near death from the exertion.

Anyway, I halved my last batch of antidepressants in April to welcome the warm, sunny weather and have then been off them completely since they ran out a week or so ago. I can now boast that I can cum in less than 45 minutes, which is great. And no more all-body sweats that can sometimes be embarrassing. However there's this all-body numbness and unnerving tingling that you get which forces you to realize you're coming down from being on a pharmecutical, which is disturbing. I don't like to be enslaved to Tha Man (Pharmecutical Megacorporations). While the Cymbalta did shear off the lows over the winter, it really didn't make them go away. It was an experiment I'm not sure I'm going to repeat next winter. I think regular exercise and getting to bed at a decent hour every night is half the battle.

But I wonder if it's me or if somebody at work put a few ounces of crystal meth into a box of kittens and puppies just to see what happens, then left me to deal with it. Everyone is wired and running around at full tilt. Alas, the deadline for the mega-newsletter was not met, but I've decided to stop working until 8 to get it done every night of the week. It will get done, just please everybody, stop snorting Tina at work!

OMG Heroes was awesome tonight. 5 years into the future and Nathan Petrelli is proposing genocide for all the "special people." Not the first self-loathing person in a position of political power making detrimental decisions against a minority. Anyway, thank GWAR Peter got a new hairdo in the future, but we'll miss Jessica. I still think Niki/Jessica is simply a crazy person, not super-powered. Sylar is a wonderful villian - he never dies and he always has something up his sleeve for next time.

But I think I still might have to go back on antidepressants if I have to wait until 2008 to see a new Battlestar Galactica episode. Really, I'm fine:
Sweetie

Posted by jimbo at 8:38 AM | Comments (10)