« January 2007 | Main | March 2007 »

February 28, 2007

tax time & giving to gay organizations...

No, my first name ain't 'donor', it's 'Janet'.  'Miss Jackson' if you're nasty....or, what have you done for me lately?

Tax time is upon us, and a fortunate few of us could use some charitable deductions. Recently a friend of mine was preparing to donate a portion of his earnings to the Combined Federal Campaign (CFC), and asked me what environnmental groups could use his extra dough. After some thought I came up with a few questions for him based on some of the things I learned as an environmental education major, but certainly not from the point of view of a person with extra money to give.

After several e-mail exchanges, we eventually whittled it down with the following questions: What environmental issues concern you the most? Do you like wildlife? Local, global or personal? Furry or feathered? The friend in question has a strong interest in furry hominids, but outside the bars he likes quackers.

We ultimately settled on Ducks Unlimited, because he likes ducks, geese and swans, and the organization works to preserve habitat crucial in their migrations and breeding. I warned him that they are supported by a lot of hunting interests, but then again a lot of habitat would never have been preserved without this support. Waterfowl habitat preservation in turn supports aquatic plants, turtles and other critters. I don't know if he eventually gave to that organization or not, but going through the process made me think about local and national interests concerning The Gays.

Many recent posts by cranky bloggers about major gay organizations, talk of a "gay insurgency," and the state of the movement forum I attended got me wondering if people are wholly aware that there are a variety of organizations to choose to donate to, and that maybe we shouldn't get so comfy putting all our eggs in one equal-sign branded basket.

HRC has its place, but no one should feel like they are limited in giving to one group (or non-deductible PAC, as John points out) . Many gay organizations (check out this database) handle targeted, local and specific interests (like a gay rugby team, for instance) that may be more important to you than a large, well-marketed umbrella organization.

Here are a few things to consider before giving money to a cause, organization or institution:

So get your ducks in a row, do some research, and give to the organization of your choice that gives back.

Posted by jimbo at 8:39 AM | Comments (12)

February 27, 2007

When to S.T.F.U.

Dear Queen Kong:

Did you miss the part in TJs invitation to the Oscar party that specifically says show up at 7:45 or before? It still didn't start until 8:30 - you arrived at 8:35 and did. not. shut. the. fuck. up.

Gurl, if you show up late to a viewing event of any kind, tone it down a bit upon your arrival. You're late, you suck, so shut the fuck up. I don't care how gay-fabulous you are, you're late and you're loud. Shut the fuck up. I missed the entire intro montage because of your mindless gibbering. And shut the fuck up when somebody's giving their acceptance speech too. I got the worst score for Oscar predictions out of like 200 homos, and it's probably your fault becuase you can't shut the fuck up. I could hear you across town and my predictions were scrambled because of your subspace yammering.

As a rule of thumb, here's a guide of when to appropriately shut the fuck up:

- Events: Olympics opening and closing ceremonies, Grammys, Oscars, Madonna interviews. Panels, seminars and breaking news. Any time Bjork tries to speak intelligibly.

- Acceptance Speeches: Any. You will be slain on sight if your vocal cords even twitch while Sigourney Weaver, Olivia Newton-John, or Kylie Minogue are accepting an award of any kind, even if they win a cheap plastic Happy Meal prize.

- Televised Reunions: The original Revolution, Spice Girls or Duran Duran.

- Programs: Battlestar Galactica, Heroes, any of the Stargate franchises.

- Heretofore unseen cinema previews of another Aliens sequel, The Transformers live-action film, and anything Marvel, even if it's a suck-ass movie like Ghost Rider.

Shut the fuck up. Thank you.

Posted by jimbo at 11:38 AM | Comments (20)

February 25, 2007

stalking stalkers

The Great Purple Blob on the radar dropped a nice amount of snow today, but it was just a day too early. Again, I beseech future Great Purple Blobs on the radar to drop their bounty during the week. Gurl took some pictures while I was sleeping in. I only caught the tail end of the snowfall as I woke up late (again).

Snow on Swann St., NW DC

Last night a bunch of us went to Remington's to see Skwurl off as he's going on a trip to an undisclosed location for a while. Again let me say how delightful it was to be there smoke-free, as it was formerly one of the worst (or best) bars for chainsmokers. Still they huddle outside to smoke, which must be a pain for the guy at the door to have them going in and out so much.

Not only did the bloggeratti show up, but so did a bunch of drunk rugby teammates, coming from the 6 Nations tournament viewing at Fado. They were well-lit by the time they arrived, and included a few of our straight teammates as well. One of 'em asked me if he could have a sip of my drink and the bitch sucked the whole thing down! After a while he bought me a new one though. They also complained of being felt up in the bar, but were good sports about it. I'm just jealous that they got felt up and I didn't.

At one point me, Skwurl, Ryan and Carl were on the stairwell between the two floors, looking down at the dance floor. Suddenly Carl tensed up and started trembling, and muttered to me that his stalker had arrived, who started talking to him and me. Carl quickly disappeared, leaving me to speak, or actually just listen to, the stalker talk about how incredible Carl was. Not that Carl isn't incredible, but it was really creepy how he went on and on to me about Carl. Yet I continued to listen, as stalkers fascinate me. I refrained from telling the stalker about how purportedly huge Carl's member was, as it would probably only encourage the stalking.

I have a number of friends with stalkers of various levels of creepiness and psychoness. Luckily I have not had the pleasure of being stalked overtly, as I think they know better or are content limiting themselves to blogstalking in silence. I either ignore them or they see the look in my eyes that says, "Keep pushin' it and I'm going to physically remind you to stay out of my life." Violence goes both ways, and as Stebbins once said to me, "Jimbo, you don't take any shit." And I don't.

I have noticed a number of similarities between all the stalkers in my freind's lives, and they can be summed up as follows:

- Most stalkers have a limited ability to socialize normally, and very low self-perception. They don't know how outright creepy they are, and they can't seem to perceive that the object of their obsession is at least unnerved by their attentions, at worst frightened.

- Most stalkers do not have a support group of friends to keep them grounded. They tend to live in their own mind without the advice a circle of friends as a sounding board that would keep a normal person aware of the effects of their actions and words.

- Most stalkers thrive on attention from their targets/victims, and any attention, no matter how long it's been or how terrible they've behaved towards thier victim, just sets them off and often makes their stalking worse. Don't give stalkers any attention.

Stalking is a serious issue when it happens, requiring the victim to have to change phones, addresses or even cities. Sometimes it leads to violence, property damage or even death. In DC, escalated or endangering stalking can be reported to the Metropolitan Police Gay and Lesbian Liaison (GLLU). What stalker experiences have you readers endured, and how did you have to deal with it in the end? Feel free to share in the comments section.

Tonight I'm going to TJ and Rob's for some hot Oscar action. I've seen very few of this year's nominees, and am mainly going for the fine socialization and merriment to be had at the birthday boys' home.

Posted by jimbo at 6:33 PM | Comments (13)

February 24, 2007

I can't wait for Easter

I know Easter is still around the corner, but this is who I'd like to have deliver my Easter Basket this year:
Scruffy Bunnyman
Please include Peeps and Cadbury Creme Eggs in the basket, preferrably served by the above gentleman.

My crazy surfing brother out west has a blog on MySpace, and he smells like cat pee.

Don't you hate it when you get a message from some hot guy in your MySpace e-mailbox, and when you read it you see that he's pimping his music/art/business? I'll pimp my friends whom I've met whose product I enjoy, but not total strangers. There's some research I came across a while back while writing a persuasion/marketing paper that basically says marketing through your personal network is a no-no and can have an equal and opposite effect than what was desired. I know MySpace tends to be more networky than Friendster and such, but I personally prefer to keep it 'just friends'. Unless it's Kelly of course.

Posted by jimbo at 9:13 PM | Comments (2)

February 23, 2007

work sucks, but at least my office is sunny

Here's a view of me and my office window. Squirrels frolic on the branches of the oak tree outside. Except when there are Cooper's hawks hunting them. Then they hide.

I like my phallic cactus plantings.

I have the same camera at work that I have at home. How come photos taken in poor lighting conditions with my work camera are always grainy? There's some setting with my work camera that is different from my home camera I think.
sunny day at work
I noticed a tiny yellow-white blossom on a cactus plant in my office today. I've never had a cactus bloom on me before.

Those are acorns in the spillway tray. I happen to like acorns and they matched the terra cotta pot.
cactus bloom

Posted by jimbo at 2:47 PM | Comments (6)

Keep Redheads out of Iraq!

PrinceHarry.jpgI don't approve of sending Prince Harry, or any redhead for that matter, off to Iraq. It's wrong and it could endanger the future of my pool of redheads, daywalkers and ginger kids to choose from. KEEP REDHEADS OUT OF IRAQ!

A grain of salt for you people out there: crimeny, I don't hate the film Brokeback Mountain - I liked it and it was a well-made film. I was just kidding in yesterday's post because people get so goddamn worked up about that movie it is entertaining to me to see people have a spaz about it when I say I didn't like it. It's just a movie, calm down people!

Again, only 95% of what you read on this blog is true. I like most Ang Lee films, and I think he gets the best out of his actors. All his films are the same - he does angst very well. Whether it is Ennis, The Hulk, Chow Yung-Fat or Sigourney Weaver, all the characters in his movies have regrets. I just watched The Hulk last weekend again and I've never seen Sam Elliott or Nick Nolte act that well before - they both have these awesome raving monologues in the film. And that woofy Eric Bana totally plays a typical tortured Ang Lee character throughout the entire film.

Apparently there was some hot scruffy redhead in The Hulk but I somehow missed him.

With the weather getting warmer, mornings coming sooner and sunsets happening later I have noticed a light at the end of the tunnel in terms of my mood. It's easier to get up in the morning, and it's much nicer to leave work when it is still light outside. December and January seem to be the worst months, and I'm never really aware of how sour my mood is until I start feeling better. And the sex drive returns too. It's sorta like listening to Morrissey songs for two months and then one day waking up feeling like this:

Or like this:

Posted by jimbo at 11:02 AM | Comments (10)

February 22, 2007

Ghost Rider sucked _this_ bad

Aww jeez, Ghost Rider is #1 at the box office this week. I can't believe it, but then again, if Americans can vote for Bush twice, they'll go see Ghost Rider I guess.

While I like my geek comic book movies, Ghost Rider sucked supreme donkey dick from start to finish, from script to CGI. It's up there as one of the shittiest comic book turned motion picture ever, right up there with Swamp Thing (starring Adrienne Barbeau, the only star of the film I must add).

Anyway, the plot of the film goes like this: Nicholas Cage's character used to be hot in the first part of the film, but then they ruin everything and fast forward to present and suddenly he has a bad wig because he sells his soul to the Devil. Not even the Devil's Contract can burn off his bad wig, not even when his skull bursts into flame. It's like an asbestos wig from hell on his head, and it possesses his mind and makes him say bad, poorly written lines in the film. I just couldn't get past that wig, I'm sorry.

Then four evil gay elemental DC Cowboy demons start chasing him. Then Eva Mendez tries to act. Then there's all this pointless CGI of swirling black shit flying through the air and then the bad guy dies because he's saw the sins of some village or something.

I'm just trying to help you people here. Don't see this film. I disliked it more than I disliked Brokeback Mountain. But at least there wasn't as many bad wigs in Brokeback, as far as I could tell. Maybe a pubic wig, maybe.

And in her time, Adrienne Barbeau could kick your pansy ass across the street - twice. I just have to make sure that fact is known. In Swamp Thing, she fucking took this heavy-ass scuba tank and fucking clocked this guy across the head, and it was the first time in cinematic history where a Latina with a French last name fought back after being chased by bad guys.

Posted by jimbo at 10:44 PM | Comments (14)

February 21, 2007

Statler & Waldorf go to HRC

Matt & JimboLast night Statler and I went to the monolithic HRC Building for the State of the Movement panel discussion and community forum co-sponsored by the National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association (NLGJA) and MetroWeekly. I went primarily to skip out of night class, but also because Statler sounded like he wanted a buddy to heckle with. The panel included: Chris Barron, Log Cabin Republicans; Herndon Davis, National Black Justice Coalition; Matt Foreman, National Gay and Lesbian Task Force; Mara Keisling, National Center for Transgender Equality; John Marble, National Stonewall Democrats; C. Dixon Osburn, Servicemembers Legal Defense Network; Joe Solmonese, Human Rights Campaign; and Pam Spaulding of Pam’s House Blend.

Overall it was a mostly civil discussion of "the movement" in terms of how the above major organizations are and have handled their business up to this day. Pam had something to say about that which I'm sure you'll see on her blog soon. Statler has already spoken her mind and testified on a few topics.

My general impression of the panel discussions was that there is still a lot of optimisim and enthusiasm in movement leaders today, but the people not presented in this panel are those who are making great change on the local level. There were a few exceptions to this in the audience, as in the case of Midge Potts from Springfield, Missourri, a 37 year-old transgender social justice activist who ran for congress in SW Missouri's August 8th Republican Primary. Midge stood up to say how she campaigned door-to-door to farmers and everyday families in SW Missouri on the platforms of direct democracy, debt free America (yeah!), and energy independence. She sounds like someone I would have voted for, but she lost. She mentioned that in meeting people as she campaigned the prejudices "melted from their faces" as she said. She was doing the footwork that really needs to be done by everyone - shaking hands, telling their stories, and making connections with people who otherwise wouldn't meet any of us urban ghetto G/L/Bi/Trans/Whatevers.

Anyhow, while Pam represented the voice of the people via blogging, and the G/L/Bi/Trans/Whatever organizational leaders were representing the organizations' efforts from the top, I didn't see enough people who were making change at local levels, individually or by small groups, which is an element that does a lot of good for raising awareness, but doesn't get a lot of credit - or money. The people I mean are the campus student groups who are ensuring they have representation on campus, individual candidates in rural or suburban areas who can make change and raise awareness, or groups like my rugby team who have touched the lives of every "straight" team we have played in our local union.

I'll probably write more about it once my thoughts form into cogent ideas, but for now I'll give you a play-by-play of my perceptions of the forum disucssion:

- The HRC building gets a 100% approval rating for nice bike racks outside and a very efficient HVAC system inside (it was kinda warm). They get a 0% for water fountain availability!

- Sean Bugg from MetroWeekly was the moderator of the panel discussion, and he's quite woofy. He has a sexy voice too, so was the perfect choice for emcee.

- The queens are still wearing too much cologne - my eyes were burning cooped up in a hot room with all those perfumes.

- Will you two gurls sitting behind us stop whispering and fidgeting? I'm trying to listen to the activists foaming at the mouth!

- Cell phones that went off during the discussion: 5. Class: none.

- The greatest problem facing transgender people today is dry, damaged hair, in my opinion.

- Ironically the hottie from the LCR agreed with my stance that more work needs to be done at the grassroots levels and by individuals.

- There was a remarkable amount of time spent discussing blogs and other new media forms and how they can benefit organizations, and their efficacy outside of organizations.

- Herndon Davis from the National Black Justice Coalition seemed to have the best strategies offered for their constituent community both through smart use of new media and for reaching to the community through churches.

- Several speakers from the audience felt that the legal strategies of the major organizations were 10 years ahead of the movement's progress. Again, let me say that the major organizations are institutionalized beyond their ability to make effective change, and changes in how people think, the awareness of what our problems are, and knowing why we are asking for these rights are not well-enough known by the general public and those who would align with the KKKrazy Konservative Kristians. Once they know enough, fairness will prevail in their minds, but until then they just don't understand what we're bitching about.

At the end of it I briefly got to meet Pam, who like me also blogs from a campus, and a few members from NLGJA, who have interest in integrating bloggers into the journosphere. When I go to things like this and the one at the Washington Post, I wonder where I stand between the journalists news blogs, entertainment blogs, organizational blogs, corporate blogs, and personal blogs, becuase a do a little bit of all of the above, and maybe some (free, 'ahem!') marketing but mostly personal stuff. The real issue for me is that it sure would be nice to earn some cash outta what I've been doing for 8 years one of these days.

Posted by jimbo at 8:37 AM | Comments (6)

February 20, 2007

the bitter winds of March blow forth...

Nothing is more humiliating than coming into work and having to explain 3,205 times to all my coworkers why I'm at work and not on vacation.

And before coming in to work, I found my first grey chest hair. Part of me is thinking, "Wuuuf. Jimbo is Daddylicious!" but another part of me is thinking, "NOOOOO! I can't be getting grey chest hairs yet!" What's worse is that it appears that grey chest hairs stand out straighter and more prominently than their neighbors, as if to say, "Look, look at me!"

And then the crazy person at work who last week asked me to do a photoshoot of his trophy asked me how much leaded crystal weighs versus molded acrylic plastic. News Flash: Do I look like a fucking materials engineer? Do I look like a fucking precious crystals appraiser? Did we just shift into Dungeons and Dragons land and I now have 4 ranks in the Appraisal skill? WTF are you asking me this shit for? Do I look like a theives guildmaster?

Do not, I repeat, DO NOT go see Ghost Rider in the theaters. It sucks supreme donkey dick. I kept waiting for the flaming skull head to burn away Nicholas Cage's bad wig, but that moment never came.

Spring is here, according to the birds. On Saturday I heard several house finches declaring their arrival, and some goldfinches too. Today I heard the first red-winged blackbird call near the College Park MetroRail station. Soon the spring peepers (a tiny frog) will be doing their spring thing too.

Posted by jimbo at 4:31 PM | Comments (9)

February 19, 2007

Super-Furry President's Day Dance Party 3000

Today, just because:
Ian Hendricks
"Ian Hendricks" as found on the Hairy Blokes blog where you can find a fine collection of Ben Cohen pics too.

Charlene Says Tim Hardaway's a big jackass, but we're long overdue for a man currently in a professional sport to come out. And I'm not talking about competitive diving, equestrian, or sportaerobics. There are gay men in professional football, baseball and basketball, and they just have to have the balls to face these idiots who will quickly shut up when faced with truth, rather than their own ignorant ideas of what gay people are. Anyhow, Hardaway needs to get his ass kicked by a rugby-playing Texan belle with big hair, cute nose and cherubic cheeks.

As for Hardaway's fear of being looked up and down in the locker room, it's probably already happened, but you know what? The DL-bruh probably behaved himself and kept it to himself.

Our rugby team is about half straight now. I think most of the straight guys play with us simply because our pitch (field) is in a convenient location. Convenience trumps homophobia in this case, and there have been plenty of times when we've all stripped naked in front of each other, and in rugby the straight and gay guys have to play in very, very close and intimate positions. My head has been in close proximity to hot straight sweaty man-crotch, and in more than a few occasions I've been face-to-'nads for a few moments. If these guys can handle it, so can professional athletes. The straight guys on our team got over it, other teams in our local league got over it, and so can professional athletes.

I like the term "rehabracadabra" coined by Sarah in TJs comments regarding Hardaway. It succinctly describes the current phenomenon where anyone can do or say anything, go to "rehab", and be absolved of all sins. This phenomenon kind of spits in the face of anyone who has actually been to rehab for a legitimate reason, and belittles the institution.

Posted by jimbo at 3:54 PM | Comments (7)

February 18, 2007

pity party over, other parties begin

The pity party is over, and I've reconciled with cancelling the trip with few regrets. Yeah, I fucked up in how I was going to get to the airport, and air travel sucks donkey dick these days, so maybe the trip just wasn't meant to be. Or perhaps I really needed that hour of sleep that made me late for the flight.

I've cancelled trips spontaneously before. I know if my mind is not into it I won't have a good time. I cancelled a three day backpacking trip when it wouldn't stop raining, since I know three days in the rain is no fun. I went on a trip to San Francisco once when I was unemployed, and all I could think about while I was there was how I was going to save money. In short, I don't leave my mental baggage at home very easily, and I don't feel I had the resources (mental, financial or emotional) to recover from a cancelled flight. The mind has to be on vacation with the body, and clearly I wasn't together on that. Looking back on it I realize I was half asleep the entire morning of the ordeal, making bad decisions the entire day and the day before. Many shoulda, couldas and wouldas, but I didn't, and that's just how it goes.

I got over myself and went out to a nice party yesterday evening, but you can see how beat I was from the day's ordeal:
sleepy
I left the party fairly early, brought a book to bed and fell asleep while trying to read.

The next trip to The Tucson Dance Party 3000 has already been easy to arrange, and my flight is booked for 2pm - very little room for sleeping in this time. I hope to also see some condors at the Grand Canyon, and perhaps some bears in Phoenix.

Posted by jimbo at 6:48 PM | Comments (6)

February 17, 2007

Costa Rica a no-go

I slept through my alarm, or maybe I turned it off, somehow waking up by myself at 5:30am at least. My flight with others from our group was to leave at 6am. I discovered that very few taxicab services even answer their phones before 7am on a Saturday, and MetroRail certainly doesn't work that early either. I wouldn't have made the flight anyway. The woman from American Airlines on the phone in the morning didn't mention that I should have rescheduled when I was on the phone with her, especially for international flights, which would have saved me $800 and enable me to actually go.

National airport was still insane with backups from the ice storm - long lines with lots of tense and upset people. When faced with an additional $800 to change my flight to tomorrow (there were no more available for today, and I can't be on stand-by with an international flight) and the vision of having to reschedule my connecting flight in Costa Rica sans decent Spanish speaking skills by myself, I just said "fuck it" and cancelled the whole trip. It would have been a chain of airport stays and a lot of uncertainty that I'm not in the mood to deal with. I don't travel internationally all that much and I'm not savvy in getting around stuff like that, and it looks like these days you need a cell phone to rearrange schedules on the spot.

All the other folks in my gang that went have either been there, are coupled and have pooled resources, and/or they speak Spanish. I'm in none of the above categories, and rearranging the trip would have been a mess with me by myself in San Jose for who knows how long - I had a connecting flight to the resort that I would have had to reschedule too. For now I'll stick with domestic, U.K. or Canada trips from here on out.

Lessons Learned:
- Early-morning flights are a bad idea for me;
- If I do have to do an early-morning flight, get someone to call me to wake my ass up;
- Taxis and MetroRail are undependable in the early morning - get a friend to drive me there;
- If I do an international trip again, it's better to stick with the group from the get-go;
- Or, for complex (to me) trips like this, use an old-fashioned travel agent, if they still exist. I don't have the time to figure most of this shit out.

I think at this point in my life, international trips are a bit outside my ability to handle solo and unwise with my current salary range. The onus of flexibility for air travel is at the customer's expense, and I just can't afford that kind of trip right now. Plus airlines seem to suck more and more every time I fly, with little regard for the customer at any leg of a trip. I know part of this is due to security concerns, but a lot of it is poor regard for the consumer by both the airlines and the government.

At least I have a travel voucher now for enough money to fly home to Wisconsin to visit the family this summer, when the weather is pleasant there with many things to do.

On a nicer note, I took some time out of work yesterday to participate in The Great Backyard Bird Count with a few of my coworkers. It's a quick bird census you can perform anywhere this weekend, and enter your count on the website. I didn't expect to see much in the afternoon of such a cold day, but we spotted quite a variety of sparrows, including the Song Sparrow, White-throated Sparrow, White-crowned Sparrow, and Chipping Sparrow. And of course the usual winter suspects: Ring-billed Gull, Herring Gull, American Crow, European Starling, and a pair of Northern Cardinals.

Posted by jimbo at 9:42 AM | Comments (18)

February 16, 2007

be vigilant while I'm gone on vacation

Y'all hold down the fort while I'm gone, ya hear?
911!: MIAMI partners
I don't know what kind of Internets access I'll have in Costa Rica, but I'm bringing my camera and I'll take pictures. Enjoy the bitter cold while I'm gone!

Posted by jimbo at 12:28 PM | Comments (5)

February 15, 2007

Paul Rudd is One Hot Primate

I wish to avoid the use of the very tired "B-word" in describing the super-sexy actor Paul Rudd. He is a handsome primate, but definitely not ursine. He is bearded and fit, and can simply be described as a sexy, bearded man, no "woof" is necessary (because my mouth would be otherwise occupied in various ways).

In this photo Paul is rocking the whole homeless NYC gnome look quite well:
Paul Rudd at Sundance 2007
I 'heart' Paul's homeless ski bum look. Look at that tuft of chest hair emerging from his collar - does it call to you as it does to me, like a dense flock of follicular sirens?
Paul Rudd at Sundance 2007
And here is Paul being a smirky, smouldering sex god:
Paul Rudd
On that note, Ryan Reynolds is now single. While I think he was worthy of the Goddess Alanis hand in marriage, it's better now that he is free to be my love slave.

I was previously in a Kelly mood today, but have since gotten over it. But my face was like this much of the day today:
What would Kelly Say?

Posted by jimbo at 2:54 PM | Comments (8)

February 14, 2007

bleh!

Yaay for Snow Day, blek for Valentine's Day:
Mr. Yuk
Since it's the most horrid day of the year, let's bitch about things today:

Note to cute upstairs neighbor seen sprinkling salt on an unshoveled sidewalk: hon, you're adorable, but you must be from a southern state. No amount of salt will disintegrate 4 inches of snow - you have to shovel it first, then sprinkle the salt on the concrete to keep it from icing over. I guess I'll be shoveling today, which is a good workout. Don't forget to warm up your muscles before shoveling heavy, wet snow.

I keep reading articles about bad planning and poor management in the Federal government. While we hail your decision in calling a Snow Day for the DC Metropolitan region today, I think it's time to get your shit together in other, major areas. I'm currently taking an Organizational Leadership and Decision-Making graduate course, and right now we're discussing the differences between management and leadership. Our current administration has dispayed little of either skillset, and our nation's president seems to have been chosen to be a puppet leader, a king without clothes, as he's a man who can neither lead, manage, or make decisions.

To make an illustration of my point, the former mayor of DC, Marion Barry, was a charismatic and politically-savvy leader, but not a manager in any way. Things in DC improved with Mayor Williams, a good manager who helped the real estate market for some homeowners and developers. Dreamy Dan Tangherlini has traits of both a manager and a leader. Mayor Fenty has yet to show which traits he excels in, but for the city I would like to see a better balance between what benefits DC residents of high-income and also the rest of us.

Our next President of the United States needs to be a good manager, since there will be a lot of garbage to clean up from the past 8 years, and people are getting pissed off about shitty health insurance, an imbalance between wage and cost of living, and unneccesary international engagements. Please try to see through the hype and consider what traits the current candidates have and what they have to offer in improving your standard of living. 8 years of scapegoating gays and summoning boogeymen for us to fear has resulted in a drop in the quality of our everyday lives. We need a good manager for president, one who can get people to work, finish tasks, and accomplish clearly stated, well-formulated, achieveable goals and objectives.

In similar news, bloggers voicing candidate's agendas will continue to experience just as much flack as the candidates themselves. I'm not sure if blogging is an appropriate tool for political campaigning, but I do know that if you open a forum for debate and discussion, you'd better have a tough hide. And from what I know of campaigns and public relations, a candidate's representative blog does need to stay in line with the campaign manager's goals, objectives and messages.

To end in a happy note, check out Chicago AIDS Foundation LifeLube campaign website and blog. The program is in-line with what I've written before about the need for gays to lead a more healthy, holistic and integrated gay lifestyle. Chris Crain also wrote about similar movements in San Francisco, and I see it as a positive trend in helping gays become less engrossed in the sometimes ephemeral and unrewarding aspects of the gay subculture, helping us find out what we really want out of life in general, not just gay life. Doing so may be key in helping gay men make better choices in their everyday lives.

OK, I won't be a complete VD grinch, cuz here's the cutest Valentine of them all, Josh, owner of The Mighty Jimbo:
Woof

Posted by jimbo at 8:18 AM | Comments (7)

February 13, 2007

an appeal to the purple blob on the weather radar

Dear Massive Purple Blob on the Weather Radar:

Stop tormenting me with hollow promises of a full snow day off of work. Come to jimbo - drift south just a few miles and pour your bounty on DC proper. I won't mind - come to jimbo and rain your hazardous icy precip on us all.

Love,
Jimbo

Here's some more silly pics from the weekend:

Jeff & Jimbo
Jeff, the other God of Biscuits.
G-Murda & Jimbo
"OMG! So like G-Murda, what do you think of my hair?"
reprezent
Me and Carl reprezentin' NW DC, pasty Scandinavian-style.
Boned Thugs 'n Harmony
Boned Thugz 'n Harmony.

More pics here.

Posted by jimbo at 8:31 PM | Comments (5)

February 12, 2007

basket case

blowoff021007-jimbo.jpg
Unflattering comparison courtesy of TJ. The picture accurately depicts me in usual form during the winter.

We all had a fun evening at Blowoff again this Saturday, and it helps me from being such a basket case.

Getting some sun and surf will help too, as I'll be staying at this beautiful resort for a week, adjacent to the Manuel Antonio National Park. I'll bring my camera and binoculars for some birdwatching, but I'd like to catch some archaeological tours too if possible. I went on an ecological tour with my university many years ago, and I think I've been to Manuel Antonio before. We'll see how my memory holds out as to whether or not I recognize the place. I hear it has been developed a lot since then, I hope I'm not up for a bad surprise.

Posted by jimbo at 12:07 AM | Comments (7)

February 10, 2007

the evolution of style

La Femina Rojo
Here's one of my City of Heroes characters, La Femina Rojo (The Red Lady), currently a 20th level scrapper (natural) with super-speed and kung-fu kicks. She resides on the Protector server. I'll have to say, matching a superhero costume with red hair is a pain in the ass, lemme tell ya, as seen in her first two costume designs. But last night she got a new costume slot with a cape, and I think I spent a hour working on it. The costume options in the game are a wet dream for anyone who likes any of the fashionista reality shows on TV. Her makeover consisted of a smart mod bob, peach highlights to the hair, and a sort of future femme-Flash look to match her powers. Behold, and despair in the glow of her couture!

La Femina is based on a real-life super-speedy girl named Salsa Juarez, pictured at right. Both can run fast! Perhaps Salsa is the out-of-costume guise of the superhero.

A few of my male characters are pictured below, from various servers::
the boys
- Alpha Ant: tech blaster, fire/energy
- Big Bad Woof: magic defender, weather/sonic
- Captain Crunk: mutation controller, mental/healing
- Geardagh: magic tanker, earth/earth
- The Green Bay Packer: natural tanker, ice/invulnerability
- Tiny Troll: mutation corruptor, vines 'n spines (City of Villains)

Posted by jimbo at 7:20 PM | Comments (13)

February 9, 2007

The Passion of the Property Management Company

Linda has been silenced, I believe. Yesterday I called the actual owner of the property I live in to tell him that Linda was being a betch about my rent. The owner likes me because I'm tidy and I take good care of the yard, so if he makes this call she'll get off my frikkin' back.

After chatting with some people about the issue of attorneys and shady property management companies, someone told me last night that the Washington Post featured an article about shady property management companies who charge late renters for attorney fees even though no attorney has been to court on their behalf. I'd love to find this article and tell Linda to shove it up her icy snatch, because that's exactly what she threatened to do. If nothing has gone to court, the late renter cannot be charged attorney fees. A cursory search on washingtonpost.com didn't come up with anything, but I'm interested in finding this article or backup information on this practice and what I can do to fight it.

Last night I was treated to The Passion of the Crawford at The Studio Theatre, featuring John Epperson as Lypsinka as Joan Crawford (Review in MW). It was just what the doctor ordered as I've been feeling very Crawford for several weeks now, and Lypsinka was the reddest cherry on top. The performance is a lip-synched homage to Joan Crawford from archived recordings of an old Crawford television interview. Anyhow, much thanks to Randy at MW for the treat.

Here is a picture from MetroWeekly of a buncha drunk queens. Here are some more drunk queens. Even more drunk queens.

Blowoff is this Saturday at the 9:30 Club starting at 11:30pm.

In other news, the aquarium fish holocaust I was referring to the other day was about my fish dying, one by one. I ordered new angelfish last week and they have since been very robust. However, all of my old resident swordtails have grown feeble and die, at the rate of about 1 each day. They either got a new disease much like the native Americans did when the first Europeans reached the New World, or I overpopulated the aquarium with too many fish, and it simply stressed out my resident fish, their immune systems failed and they succumbed. But my new angelfish are robust, at least.

Posted by jimbo at 11:37 AM | Comments (7)

February 8, 2007

Linda, stop being such a betch about my rent

Dear Linda at T_____-B_________ Property Management:

I've always paid my rent on time, if not early, and have been only a week late this time. I wanted to make sure the check I gave you doesn't bounce, as paychecks only came in yesterday.

I gave you my check in person this morning. So you don't need to sic your attorneys on me, especially when I am most certainly not some kind of no-good, low-down deadbeat renter. And you certainly don't need to threaten me in that tone. Sugar works a lot better than salt with me.

I am a model renter. I take care of the garden in front and in back, I take out my trash and sweep my sidewalk and I even champion the cause of tidy neighborhood - with results. I am involved with community improvement efforts even though I don't own the property in which I'm living. As a renter I don't have to do any of these things, but I do, because it is my home even though I do not own it.

You people, however, have left me high and dry when my A/C blows out, send incompetents to come fix the issue, and now you're getting on my case for being a week late? What will eventually happen if you continue to be a bitch is that I will leave, and then you're gonna get some low-down deadbeat meth-smoking renter who will set the house on fire or something like that. Is that what you want? When something is good, keep going with it, and don't invite trouble.

So back off, be nice and give me a break this time. It's been a rough couple of months. I understand that it's your job to be a bitch but there are better ways of going about being a bitch, and certainly better targets for your ire. Just ask me (a bitch) on how to go through with being a bitch in a nicer way.

Kisses,
Jimbo

Posted by jimbo at 12:38 PM | Comments (12)

February 6, 2007

I will not scream at my boss. I will not scream at my boss...

Last week was a blur, this weekend a period set out only for mental regeneration and plenty of sleep lost the week before. Tonight I figured out why I went to the wrong class (it was across the hall from where I was supposed to be). I swear I saw the right number on the classroom door, but my eyes were playing tricks on me all week due to the stress of organizing an event on short-notice, one that will happen in March, in addition to redesigning a website and fixing all the unexpected bugs that come with it.

But by the end of that week I was arriving home so exhausted that I forgot to take my antidepressant medicine on Thursday and Friday nights. I should have known something was up when I had little problem doing the things I do when I look at dirty pictures on the Internets. And by the weekend I was having disorientation and numbness in my extremeties - but was still a quickdraw when things needed a shootin', so to speak - which was unusual. Then I remembered the pill I should be poppin' at night, resumed taking them, and things normalized again. Antidepressants are not meant to be forgotten or quit cold turkey - you have to ease off of them when you decide to quit, or else you end up screaming at your boss about where to find the redesigned links on your new home page.

Things that Sux Donkey Dick this week:

- The Green Line Sux Donkey Dick: I know we just extended the Yellow Line a bit further towards Greenbelt, but can the unexplained stops in remote wooded areas get fixed soon? It's been like that for over a month. While I love my wildlife viewing (and saw a fox during one long stop!), but not when it means I'll be late(-er than usual) to work.

- The Michigan Court of Appeals Sux Donkey Dick: when the Krazed, righteous and Konservative Kristians (KKK) were opposing gay marriage in Michigan, they said that's all they were gonna do. But then they insisited the state adhere to an obsucre part of the existing constitution, maliciously pointing out that city and private companies shouldn't have partnership benefits either. That's just plain mean.

These people, when given power, will not stop until any recoginition of the lives of gay and lesbian American tax-paying citizens are wiped out completely. They envision a world filled with only a man, woman and 2 kids and that is it. Gay contrarians justifying the work of these diabolical maniacs will see their arguments from inside the boxcar on the way to work camps if the KKKristians get their way.

- Josh Groban being overheard singing at any time during the month of February, especially on the 14th, Sux Donkey Dick.

- Ted Haggard Sux Donkey (and escort) Dix: Ted says he's 100% Straight. Riiight. Mike Jones And I suppose if you were gay you'd be the kind of guy that says he's a 100% top too. Any guy who hires an escort that hot is gay, Gay, GAY! And has good taste as well. Sorry you missed this chance to get real about yourself, maybe next time. But if you call us out again we're gonna come back for the second round with extended claws flying just like before.

- Aquarium fish mass-holocaust deaths Sux Donkey Dick.

- Televised basketball on every single cable station in the universe Sux Donkey Dick.

- Sports-Related Herpes Transmission Sux Donkey Dix: It's bad enough that there's something called 'scrum herpes' out there for us rugby players, but wreslters can get it too, apparently.

I did get out and about for Superbowl festivities on Sunday, but didn't pay much attention to the actual game, which I hear was pretty lame anyway. While at a social at Titan's Ramrod I did get to meet Mr. Barometer, to whom I introduced Martinia Gurlatalova too. Barometer Mike is quite woofy. I caught myself looking at his pecs a lot.

Posted by jimbo at 10:46 PM | Comments (12)

February 4, 2007

<+)O 's Hard-as-Rock Superbowl silhouette

Did anyone catch the phallic silhouette against the fluttering sheet during the Purple Rain guitar solo of <+)O's Superbowl halftime performance tonight?
Don't wait for your neighbor - green eggs and ham!
Get me a screenshot, people. It beats Janet's nipple, hands-down, so to speak. Luke Daywalker says Prince looked like Celie from The Color Purple with that 'do-rag.

UPDATE: Here it is - note the strange stains on the sheet. Erotic City cum alive:
Spooky Electric or Camille is to blame
There were other, more suggestive silhouette poses in that sequence. I think Camille or Spooky Electric got the better of him tonight, despite his purported association with the Jehova's Witnesses.

While it wasn't his best performance, he gets props for ordering rain from his good friend God for the Purple Rain set, and covering the Foo Fighers' ""Best of You". The song sounded familiar but I didn't figure it out until I went online later to find out what song that was.

Minneapolis is just a 2-hour drive north and across the river (Yes, the Mississippi goes that far north) from where I grew up. We drove to Minneapolis for the kickoff of his Lovesexy tour, and I went up twice for a screening of the letdown sequel to Purple Rain, a seldom-watched movie called Grafitti Bridge. We tried to sneak into Glam Slam but Minnesota's underage law was really strict. Do the math to figure out how long ago that was...

If you're on a long roadtrip and playing 'Six-Degrees of Kevin Bacon' to pass the time, using Prince as a starter is really tough unless you've watched the film Under the Cherry Moon. No cheating using IMDB! A hint is after the break.

Using Peter O'Toole is really hard to do playing Six-Degrees of Kevin Bacon too.

Hint: Under the Cherry Moon featured a little known-actress named Kristin Scott Thomas as the lead female, and Prince's lover, in the movie.

Posted by jimbo at 9:09 PM | Comments (17)

A walk through NW DC with jimbo

For my recommended daily allowance of sunshine, I took a roundabout walk through my neighborhoods and took some photos of people and things where I live.

I Lee's Flowers and Card Shop at 1026 U Street, NW DC. They always have fun holiday window displays, and are another of my favorite DC institutions.
Lee's Flowers and Card Shop
Here's the man with the best beet recipes in DC, and the best beats as well: OMG DJ SeanShow trying to enjoy his cuppa joe at Caribear Coffee on Rhode Island and 14th Streets, before I arrived and started pestering him.
The Sean Show
This embossed monolith stands outside the Australian Embassy on Mass. Ave. and 16th. Before 9/11, there was always good parking outside this building, but then they blocked it off and now no one can get parking there anymore. Anyway, while I took this photo, 'Suddenly' by Olivia Newton-John and Cliff Richard was playing on my iPod mini shuffle. OMG, weird! The song is from the Xanadu motion picture soundtrack, by the way.
Australian Embassy, Washington, D.C.
Here's me at the DuPont Circle fountain, in the middle of DuPont Circle proper. Note to visitors: while DuPont Circle was once considered the gay center of DC, that is no longer true, so stop trying to cruise there! You're better off on 17th Street, or better yet, 14th Street, where it's currently gay at the moment.
DuPont Circle fountain
After my walk I met up with my weekend workout partner, Martini Gurlatalova, who is also on the rugby team. While she is not a rice queen, she is a rice geneticist in real life, and an opinionated blogger as well. Anyway, Martini lives in the 'burbs but comes down on the weekends to workout in the city gyms for the scenery. I often have to rouse her from entranced staring siezures to focus on the workout and not on the cavemen at our gym.
Q St. escalator, DuPont Circle MetroRail
The above photo was taken in the Q Street entrance to the DuPont Circle MetroRail station, one of the longest escalators in the system. It has an endearing place in my heart because I ascended into DC in 1993 for the first time for that gay and lesbian march on Washington, just a babe in the woods having taken the bus to DC from Wisconsin for the event. When we came up the escalator the entire exit was filled with cheering gays, I'll never forget that. And when we walked to the Circle, Kevin Aviance was performing and I thought a bald drag queen with rhinestones affixed to his face was the freakiest thing I'd ever seen. And in this escalator entrance was the first time I met Dogpoet too. So for both reasons it has dreamy significance for me.

Posted by jimbo at 8:15 AM | Comments (9)

February 2, 2007

Who cooks for you? Who cooks for you-all?

The Barred OwlTonight I was most industrious in cleaning up our redesigned website at work until about 9pm on campus. I know, I know, I pity the fool who does that downtown, but I don't make a habit of it. It's been a shitty week and I'd prefer next week not be so shitty. When I finished what tasks I could, I walked to my bus stop which is across the street from a wooded area over a stream, and I heard a familiar call - barred owl sonogram, 43K"Who cooks for you? Who cooks for you-all?" which is an easy way to remember how the real call sounds - "hoo-hoo-to-hoo, hoo-hoo-to-hoo-aww." and I called back at the Barred Owl (Strix varia). I do a pretty accurate Barred Owl call that impresses most naturalists and brings all the owls to the yard. While I haven't done it in years, I haven't lost my charm, and he called back. We exchanged calls two more times, and with each answer he flew in closer to investigate who this chump was until he was across the street from me and I could see him under the streetlamp light.

My bus arrived and I had to end this engaging conversation and get home.

So what did he say? I think he was telling me that work is driving me crazy and I have to move on, judging how my mood shot from absolutely miserable to elated the moment I heard him. Barred owls aren't my usual animal totem spirit guide, but I'll take my advice where I can get it.

But at least somebody returned my calls tonight. Not bad for a guy without a cell phone.

Posted by jimbo at 10:46 PM | Comments (3)

Is there some game going on this weekend?

Ski Brokeback!  Take a close look at the names of the runs down the slopes.

The Southern states are getting more snow than the Mid-Atlantic this season.  Send some of that powder our way! My board is waxed and ready to go, but the weather has not been cooperating.

Mark yer calendars: the Washington Renegades Rugby Football Club, is hosting a big gay rugby tournament for all the Mid-Atlantic and east coast teams on May 19th.  It'll be at Gravelly Point by National Airport, which is always a nice place to play as the jets fly overhead and the Washington Monument is in the background.

I guess I'm glad I share my last name with a real gun, not some Super Soaker or pastry gun.

On heavy rotation this week, the appropo 'STFU' by Revolucian...STFU as in sampling from Babs. It just fit so well as the soundtrack for this week.

Watch out for Gay Bands.  OMG I had a vague idea that Bob Mould was gay, but didn't have a clue about Metallica.


Sorry, Mary:  think your baby isn't political?  Your baby became political when the party you chose to work for decided to use people like you as a campaign tool.  But I guess you thought you weren't like the people your father's party demonized for 8 years, but welcome to the world that you made.

St. Olaf is real, not a fictional place Rose Nylund went to get her degree.  And they have a choir and they're coming for you.

Apparently there is some major sporting event going on this weekend.  The only bowl of importance to me already happened.
woodchuck.jpg

HAPPY WOODCHUCK DAY!

Posted by jimbo at 11:51 AM | Comments (7)

February 1, 2007

Don't Fuck With Me Thursday Post

Miss Faye Dunaway"Don't fuck with me fellas. This ain't my first time at the rodeo."

-----

Dear Marina:

Thanks for the Frienster message. You're cute...love the name. Were you that sea-creature in Alpha Flight? Loved the costume.

It has got to suck living among Russian men in Cheboksari. I know all they do is smoke and drink and they're total losers.

But girlfriend, you gotta target the right audiences if you want to get your ass out of Russia! An out gay man won't get you a green card. Contact your nearest Peace Corps volunteer for better translation too. All my English students in Kazakstan did was to re-write profiles for girls like you.

Hell, I want to Marina my ass up to British Columbia to get out of this church-state we're in before they start putting the gays in camps. Anyone in Vancouver want to sponsor me for citizenship? I love you long time.

There are your cranky posts of the week, people.

Posted by jimbo at 12:13 PM | Comments (3)

I'm the Juggernaut, bitch!

I deserve some kind of recognition for maintaining focus in the gym last night. Sometimes I work out on campus where I work and not downtown, especially in the winter when it's cold, as I know how easily I can convince myself not to work out in some way or another on the commute back home before riding my bike to the gyms in DC. But despite the crowding at the campus gyms during the school year, filled with muscular and distracting proto-metrosexual students aged 18-21, I still have to go there or else I won't work out at all.

And apparently the university I work at has the highest ratio of Jewish students in the region for a public university, and at this particular gym on campus there's scruffy Jews, beefy Jews, cut Jews, wrestler Jews, Jock jews, tall Jews, lean Jews, bearded Jews, blond Jews, puppy-dog faced Jews and even red-headed Jews. Most of them are furry too. And I maintained workout focus for the entire time I was there in the face of temptation not even the devil could throw at me.

So I deserve an award. Howabout "Best Composure in the Face of Ultimate Temptation"? Them were some fine Kosher chicken in there tonight, lemme tell ya.

But there was a reason for my laser-focus tonight, as it was a very trying day at work, which always leads to a good workout. This week we underwent the redesign and migration of a very large website, which involves cleaning out old files, redesigning the important stuff, and making sure all the links work on hundreds of pages. Even with staff support and good software, it's a lot of labor that requires organization and memory. Add this to an unexpected event for next week that I'm coordinating and advertising, and a major event in March where I'm doing the same thing, plus a looming newsletter deadline on my shoulders, in addition to a new grad school class starting up (and I still don't know where class is). Needless to say my desk is filled with tasks and my e-mail box fills up by the minute. While I find a rhythm in multitasking through the day, it's not my forte and it exhausts me.

And usually I get the flurries taken care of in the morning, allowing me to work on my marketing networking, chasing professors for pictures, info and lecture titles, and putting small fires out in general. This allows me time in the afternoon to focus on the tasks that require concentration, like writing articles and media alerts, fixing web pages, restoring links, and desktop publishing - all of which require uninterrupted periods of concentration. I have this now after an office move to a more quiet area of our department, but on some days there are exceptions to this.

The new semester has started and everyone has a problem, and they come into my office telling me about it at great length with no warning. Perhaps my new aquarium fish are too relaxing to watch and causes conversational diarhea in most people. But unless it's on e-mail, during busy times like this at work my mind is a sieve and it goes in one ear and out the other.

So the second to last person to come into my office got his point across, but then he droned on and on and I couldn't even find change in my wallet correctly as the buzzing humm of his voice was scattering my brain across the cosmos. Following him was a person with a very bomastic, forcefull manner, and although he is very nice I just wasn't ready for his pure force at that time. The list of things to fix on the freshly redesigned site was growing while he was talking and there was a number of things I had to get done for the upcoming events by the end of the day as well. But like the man before him, his statements and tasks to deliver turned into a barrage of semiautomatic gunfire to my brain. Brrr-att! Brrr-att! Rrrrrattatttattattt. And he just wouldn't stop even after I told him I can't do what he wants me to do now, so please write the points in an e-mail, but he kept on going at that pace, not seeming to notice the hysterical tone rising in my voice. At such trials in my life I abruptly quiet down and drop my head as if in prayer, and my eyes shift from side to side as if seeking escape. Close friends have seen this dire moment, and know to back off. But not everyone knows they should stop what they are doing and quiet down so I can procees before I explode.

And I know I can explode easy, so I have developed the catatonic method described above to deal, but that wasn't working, and the verbal gunfire to my head wasn't stopping either. So I left my office that had become his space and walked down the hallway, not intending to stop until the blast of pain forming in my left temple would stop throbbing. I walked the length of the building, breathing deep, cooling down the wave of heat cascading over my brain.

I returned to my office and it was empty. I closed my door and sat down and logged off AOL and work e-mail to reduce distraction, and approached each task calmly and in an orderly fashion in my own physical, mental and cyber space at my desk. No one came to visit after that, and I got most of my tasks completed, or at least organized enough so I could finish it tomorrow when I'm less addled.

I got out of my office at 7pm, something I avoid getting in a habit of doing. But hell, I'm seasonally-depressed, it's winter, and working allows me to be in a state of not-depressed for a time, but I'm not saying it's a happy thing either.

I haven't felt the way I felt today since I was in college, president of both an active gay and a busy environmental campus student groups, and taking a 5-credit chemistry class in addition to ecology and calculus at the same time. Yeah, I was younger with more stamina then, but I'm equally pressed with tasks today. I know a lot of type-A gays like to load up their tasks in the same way, usually plowing through them like Juggernaut, thinking we're invulnerable and irresistable in our advance on our work, because we're fabulous and should be up to the tasks for the day, right?

But every superhero and supervillian has their Achilles' heel, and mine was found today. But at least I didn't yell out, "I'm the JUGGERNAUT, bitch!" at the chatty people in my office.

Posted by jimbo at 8:18 AM | Comments (2)