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August 10, 2006
no hair gel for you
I guess one good thing about this recent Red Alert is that we'll see MORE 70s porn star 'staches in the news, as with this woofer, Mr. James Adrian, LAPD. I guess it's a fitting news story to go along with this week's theme.
As I recall during the heightened security alert immediately following 9/11, there was eye candy all over the place in DC, from the hot muscley air marshals to numerous woofy National Guardsmen scattered around DC and in the Metrorail stations.
However, as some people have commented, Lieberman (basically Republican) Loss + BP Oil Leak + Lame Excuse to Raise Oil Prices = Red Alert. Until I see faces and proof, I just don't believe it. The news this week was too devastating to the powers that be for it to be mere coincidence.
So in addition to having my cherished nose hair trimming scissors confiscated if I accidentally pack it in my carry on and/or having to take my shoes off because of that one moron with the shoe bomb, now we are all going to die of dehydration on the plane AND have NO HAIR GEL:
The Transportation Security Administration announced that passengers on all U.S. flights, domestic and international, would be banned from transporting any type of liquid or gel in their carry-on luggage. The ban applies to all types of beverages, shampoo, toothpaste, hair gels and other items of a similar consistency, the TSA announced.
I can live without my hair gel during the flight, but I always pack a liter bottle of water, as the 1/4 cup of soda they give us is never enough for me, and sometimes I need more. Flights dehydrate me. So those airlines better frikkin' deliver more soda and water if I can't bring it on the plane myself. Pretty soon we'll all just be packaged in shrink wrap, put in a box, which are then put in protective compartments like egg cartons so we cannot endanger ourselves on a flight.
Speaking of water, today's second 70s porn star 'stache is of some goofy Navy SEAL, but I don't know who he is, so don't ask, as I wouldn't tell anyway. He's cute though. The last guy is from The Mopod Show's Woof of the Week BigMuscleBear profile.
Anyway, today's porn star 'stache theme is "blond 'staches".
Posted by jimbo at August 10, 2006 11:48 AM
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Comments
Don't fret too much over in-flight dehydration. There are still plenty of shops INSIDE the TSA Liquid/Gel/Nose Hair Trimmer Security Free Zone where you can stock up on refreshments prior to departure. Just be prepared to pay airport prices though.
Posted by: TMS at August 10, 2006 1:01 PM
There are so many woofy, furry blonde men here in Vancouver [Mancouver] that I have whiplash from looking at them! It's true!
Posted by: homer at August 10, 2006 1:18 PM
I must say that I'm thoroughly enjoying your tribute to porn 'staches, especially today's featured blond 'staches. I'm going to be looking for some of those this weekend. Thanks for the inspiration.
Posted by: J.P. at August 10, 2006 1:35 PM
it looks like stache no. 2's profile's been de-activated, though! :(
Posted by: matt at August 10, 2006 1:54 PM
Next thing you know, the terrorists will figure out how to make exploding mustaches and...
I'm not sayin' but I'm sayin'.
Posted by: palochi at August 10, 2006 3:22 PM
Shallow, vain bastards like me need our hair gel mid-flight... the airplane headrests can be murder on one's 'do.
I hope these new restrictions are not permanent. It will cramp my travelling style, as I rarely check bags. I have mastered the art of loading 10 costume changes into a carry-on. When I was in P-Town last weekend, no one could believe that I brought 7 costume changes (with 4 pairs of shoes) for 3 days all in my carry-on.
If these restrictions are permanent, I guess I will have to start checking bags, or ship the steamer trunk I call my shaving bag ahead.
Posted by: JD at August 10, 2006 3:48 PM
Screw this crap, I'm taking a freighter next time, with lots of muscly seamen onboard.
Posted by: copperred at August 10, 2006 3:59 PM
Go ahead and fret since any liquids purchased between the security check and the gate must be consumed prior to boarding. My solution though is to pack ice cubes instead.
Anyways, funny how the anti-war-dump-Lieberman-vote story has been squashed by . . . yes, you guessed it . . . a raised terror alert.
And let's not forget the embarassing BP leaking pipe story.
Posted by: Chip at August 10, 2006 4:22 PM
Hmm. No gel? This is going to make joining the Mile High Club a little bit rougher. Ouch.
Frankly, though, the bathrooms on the Acela are far more spacious and comfortable.
Posted by: boo augustus at August 10, 2006 5:43 PM
Shave your head! There you go.
Posted by: Joe at August 11, 2006 4:38 AM
You know it's all well and good to question authority but tying in a primary election in Conneticut to a Terrorism operation in london and a pipe line problem in alaska is a bit much Jimbo.
Besides the pipeline break in Alaska has more to do with local politics than terrorism, and Lieberman could have used the boost LAST week not after he lost.
Posted by: Tim at August 11, 2006 10:27 AM
Woof-of-the-week's bigmusclebear.com photos are kind of devastating.
Posted by: John T at August 11, 2006 11:27 AM