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August 30, 2006
crazy-ass mothafukka
Matt Lauer shirtless has nothing to do with this post. But I hope the image of him makes you feel better, however.
I don't mean to steal his thunder, but I just started taking Cymbalta in preparation to keep the winter doldrums at bay this year. No bitches, it ain't Celebrex, although after my first rugby practice last night I might have to consider it. Maybe posting about pharmecuticals will keep all the comment SPAM at bay too - I'm going to try opening comments again today. Let's see if the shitstorm of SPAM is over.
Anyway, last winter I sunk into a dark pit, I think due in part to having moved into a mostly-lightless basement. I need my sunshine and light, and when it's gone I get real down. So I talked to my doctor about it, and he suggested starting in advance, not when the symptoms start. Plus I wasn't aware that I was depressed last winter until the sun started coming out more in the spring, when I could look back and see how dark my thoughts had become. There were other factors too: I was still getting over a good relationship that ended, a string of turkeys I had dated, and a particularly grey winter didn't help either. And you never know what else is eating you inside sometimes.
So anyway, the first side-effect I noticed from taking this drug was increased sweating, especially in the face. My face now tends to break out into a drippy sweat with the slightest exertion. Last night at practice I was able to wring my shirt out three times, which was absolutely disgusting. I sweat a lot as it is, and don't really need any help doing it. Sweating and delayed ejaculation. It now takes forever to shoot my load, which may be embarrassing to explain at a later date with someone. On the other hand, when I do shoot I shoot A LOT because I'm so worked up by then, so look out and close your eyes. Hopefully both side effects will subside with time.
On the upside, I do feel a little more even-keeled, haven't had an enraged outburst lately, and don't feel frustrated and hopeless at work. I am more productive at work. And I can get to sleep easier at night. It did not seem to affect my aggro at rugby last night, and I played smart.
I don't like the idea of taking medications for emotions, but last winter it got so bad it was affecting my relationships with people, and I did or said things that I don't think I would have done or said during sunnier months.
A friend once said to me, "The only time I've ever been on antidepressants is during Republican administrations," which may be a contributor too. In addition to the lack of work getting done by the President and an overriding feeling of hopelessness, helplessness and despair, there is depressing or silly news on all the time, be it war, constant infringements into our shrinking realm of civil liberties, the media trying and convicting innocent (but still creepy) people, all that Katrina and 9/11 stuff, and all the gloom and doom on the news. I think it's best to stick to Project Runway until 2008, and Battlestar Galactica will be starting up soon too.
And of course there's the ultimate placebo, City of Heroes. But you won't see me getting as apeshit crazy over a game like this kid does.
Posted by jimbo at August 30, 2006 11:14 AM
Comments
testing... talk you crazy betches!
Posted by: jimbo at August 30, 2006 11:58 AM
So, according to 'Celebrity Duets', Lucy Lawless, our own Lesbian Warrior Princess, is now a bleach blond, porn-star coifed memeber of Battlestar?
Posted by: Red at August 30, 2006 1:47 PM
Tom Cruise is going to be so disappointed in you. But the rest of us are gratified that you have been pro-active.
Posted by: WehoMark at August 30, 2006 2:08 PM
Yes, Miss Lawless has been on BSG since _last_ season. And I would contend that her hair is more like Gena Gershon's or Kristine W's hair.
Posted by: jimbo at August 30, 2006 2:53 PM
If only we could get Bamber in pill form.
Posted by: chrisafer at August 30, 2006 3:10 PM
I would be addicted after the first pill of Bambertrin. Or should we call it Bambertol, Bamberteramine, or Bamber-meth?
Posted by: jimbo at August 30, 2006 3:31 PM
I need me some Bamber-meth now. Forget rehab ... I'd do anything for my next fix.
Posted by: SmartAss at August 30, 2006 4:13 PM
i doubt anyone would need a spoonful of sugar to swallow Bambertrol. i know i wouldn't. :)
Posted by: Jeremy at August 30, 2006 4:15 PM
You should document your progress through daily self-photos posted on your site; it is the only way we can make sure it is actually working.
Posted by: durban bud at August 30, 2006 5:10 PM
You could document in Old Icelandic too...
Posted by: TOS at August 30, 2006 9:04 PM
I vote for hairy photos over Icelandic prose. Jimbo is too cute, regardless of the meds.
Posted by: SmartAss at August 30, 2006 9:56 PM
I don't take anti-depressants myself, but many of my friends do. I have found exercise keeps my symptoms at bay. I guess you can't play rugby in the winter, but I am sure you do other things though during that time. It's interesting how this chemical reaction causes different symptoms in different people.
There is a chance I'll be moving north. I wonder how I will deal with the constant gray skies. I am so used to constant sunlight. Perhaps then I too will need something like Cymbalta or Wellbutrin. That has me worried because it is a fine line I walk with the depression thing. So far if I walk at least an hour a day I fend off the funk, but if I slack off I can feel it creeping up on me.
I guess it's good that's all it takes to manage it though. Anyhow good luck with the pre-emptive strike!
Posted by: Kevin-Andrew at August 30, 2006 10:36 PM
Here is another less biased link for Cymbalta:
http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/druginfo/uspdi/500549.html
I am glad that you are taking action to prevent the reoccurrence of your depression. But there are many possible side effects to antidepressants and as the site referenced above alludes to you probably should, at least have a liver function test sometime this winter. Sorry to inject a little negativity into a positive step forward, but I read your blog every day and want you to be happy and well.
Posted by: Randy at August 31, 2006 9:46 AM
hey Jimbo, was good to see ya before practice on Tuesday. Hope it went well and that I can get back out soon.
SB
Posted by: Scott at August 31, 2006 10:19 AM