« I'm talkin' 'bout resolution | Main | bring your hottie to USDA day »
July 9, 2006
changing channels
In accordance with a resolution to get out and meet more people and be more social, I signed up for a tubing trip down the Shenendoah River organized by a friend who lives near me. It was a lovely, relaxing Saturday, and the weather cooperated, making for a lazy, but short three-hour drift through the green river valleys.
While I enjoyed myself for the most part, I hadn't felt so socially awkward since high school much of the day, as the group of some 50 gay boys wasn't my usual posse. Sometimes I drifted alone on my tube, sometimes linking up to rafts of boys here and there, but not having much to contribute to chats during the trip. While I wouldn't call the group the A-List crowd, they might have been somewhere near A- or B+, concerned largely with teeth whitening, how many weekends they have reserved in P-Town (but not Rehoboth, for God's sake) and who's going to hook up with whom. I could count the number of people among the 50 who had untrimmed chests like mine on one hand. After about 20 minutes of hearing about who had the biggest cock, I was content to de-link from this raft or that and try another channel in the river with a different gathering of tubes.
I'd hung out with this crowd before when I lived closer to Shaw, and felt the same discomfort, rarely having much to contribute during cocktail conversations. The 'type' of people I feel comfortable hanging out with hasn't changed much since high school, only the mutual age of those I'm with has changed. The tubing trip made me think a lot about who I did enjoy hanging out with much of the time: introspective bloggers, the Alterna-Bear crowd at Blowoff, the well-traveled and educated, creative types, dedicated couples, sci-fi geeks, and people with passions outside of hooking up. I like to be with people who have met adversity some time in their lives or have spent some time skidding on the pavement of life and are unashamed and unafraid to talk about it. People for whom propriety is not a priority, who don't put up a facçade of affected normalcy, people for whom difference and being different is the norm rather than something to aspire to. People who are not hung up on their perception of masculinity. People who see it and call it like it is. The freaks and the geeks are my peeps I guess.
The barbeque following the river trip wasn't that different in character, as the majority of the crowd was buzzing amongst each other, sizing each other up, playing a game I was never good at and largely avoid. I overheard someone say something to the effect of, "Don't hate the player, hate the game," but I wasn't sure I agreed. Eventually the sun, heat and posturing drove me to the shade of a tree, where I sat with a cluster of other PWBF (People With Body Fat/Boy Friends). I'm not saying I'm asexual, but if two people want to get together, I'm not one for ceremony or courtship displays. Those are for the birds that I watch through my binoculars.
The sun, beer and social interaction had me in bed by 10pm, and I slept for 10 hours after that, well caught up by today for an unlikely gathering of people with whom I had more in common with. We were together at Annie's to coordinate the funeral arrangements for our mutual friend, yet I somehow felt more at ease with this group than with the previous day's gathering, despite the sad circumstance. I guess it's all about mutual interests, whatever they may be.
Posted by jimbo at July 9, 2006 4:41 PM
Trackback Pings
TrackBack URL for this entry:
http://www.kr8tiv.com/blogit/mt-tb.cgi/2050
Comments
Good for you, for being social. But I'd also like to know where ARE the freaks and geeks in this area???? I haven't been able to make many friends in this area yet. Guess I'm too picky or something.
Posted by: Sarah Jean at July 9, 2006 7:09 PM
I wonder about gay guys and reading stuff like this seems to legitimize my concern. Teeth whitening? P-Town? Cock-talk? I feel like these subjects are often bandied around the mouths of gay guys I see/meet and they also seem like the most yawnworthy things to be concerned with...Must we really trim our chests?
And on the other hand, I can hardly even recognize a gay guy if he isn't prominently displaying a bunch of characteristics that I tend not to really dig. Like there's a Lowest Common Denominator Gay Man who I want nothing to do with and can't seem to get away from. I guess there are always the unsmiling, headless 'masc' closet cases.
Freaks/Geeks Rule.
Posted by: Kameron at July 9, 2006 7:22 PM
Funny, I almost went on a trip down the Shenendoah today with a group of gay guys from DC. Who knew that DC gay guys thought to rafting & tubing was so fun?
Now we know.
Posted by: Swede And Czech at July 9, 2006 8:18 PM
We organized a tubing trip to the same place you went a few years back with a bunch of cool freaks. We had a blast. Plus, most of us are furry. Come join us next time we go!
Posted by: dBud at July 9, 2006 9:47 PM
Yeah, I feel the same way trying to fit into the DC gay crowd. I came out late so a lot of this mindless chatter just puts me off. Plus being an introvert doesn't help. At all.
P.S. I hate the player, and the game.
Posted by: Tre at July 9, 2006 10:31 PM
I'm assuming this was that thing the gay veterans group puts together every now and then (generally 2-3x/summer). I went twice last summer. First time was great, very relaxed and easy-going crowd. The weather was perfect, very little attitude, and not one mention of teeth whitening products. The second time was a little different. One of my 'a-list' friends had mentioned that he was going on a tubing trip with 'his posse'. I put two and two together, mentioned that I was going on the same trip, and that it'd be good to see him outside of a bar. He just arched an eyebrow and said "you got on the guestlist too?" (obviously I'm using the term 'friend' loosely). Sure enough, when we got off the school bus at the river, the group almost immediately split up into two groups: the A (minus?) listers and the rest of us. Thankfully, the groups were about the same size, so I still had some people I could talk to. And for an added bit of fun, we were hit with a torrential downpour about halfway thru the trip. Those little twinks looked like drowned rats after about five minutes :)
Posted by: Dan at July 9, 2006 10:48 PM
sigh....the more things change, the more they stay the same.
Posted by: Brechi at July 9, 2006 10:54 PM
I have body fat and a boyfriend. Thanks for making me not feel like a loser! :D
Posted by: Paul at July 10, 2006 12:51 AM
Someone recently told me that Target® brand whitening strips work really well.
Posted by: Eric at July 10, 2006 8:28 AM
I whitened my teeth, whenever I re-apply the peroxide solution my teeth gleam. very useful if I ever get lost in a cave.
Posted by: Homer at July 10, 2006 11:15 AM
It seems like you had a good time even though the majority of the group sounds like they should have been slapped upside and down. Maybe you should organize a rafting trip for the "introspective" bloggers or the Alterna-Bear crowd at Blowoff?
Posted by: Shawn at July 10, 2006 12:14 PM
There's an A-List?
I was once on the A-List . . . at least as far as a tram full of tourists were concerned. When I worked at a major film studio and theme park operator, I fell in with an "evil" group of co-workers who would "salt" the backlot tour. The lucky A-Lister Of The Day waited for the tram tour at the backlot cafe. As the tram passed by, the conspirators on board would start pointing and waving and making a general ruckus about the A-Lister, who would approach the tram to graciously sign autographs, hats, napkins, breasts (yes, some of the women I worked with were a bit wild). Somewhere in the world, my signature is the treasured possession of a studio visitor.
Posted by: Boo Augustus at July 10, 2006 2:56 PM
It's always fun treat to read your blog -- a bright spot on the web, with a great sense of humor and candor.
Posted by: Patrick at July 12, 2006 12:14 AM