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July 18, 2006

A Stalker's Pledge

No Harm Shall Visit The Bamber
for as long as I breathe.
His Auburn Halo shall glow for me.
His scruff forever present,
hot British accent barely held in check.
JamieBamber1.jpg
Hey Bamber Stalkers...a larger desktop version of this image with hi-rez scruff and chest fur can be found here.

Just ignore the inane Out magazine copy text, which undoubtedly conjectures whether or not Bamber is gay, whether or not Apollo is gay, blah blah blah. Neither are, but hotness sells magazines.

As my husband, The Bamber transcends gay/straight labeling. He is simply mine.

From Carl, some more definitions...I'm definitely guilty on both counts of being both a Cuddleslut and a Cuddlewhore. I was once most impressed by a very memorable Christmas trick way back when where the guy made it clear beforehand that he was a Cuddlewhore, and also made me pledge ahead of time that we would cuddle afterwards. That's my kind of guy.

Cuddleslut: A guy who loves to cuddle after sex, even if it's just a hookup. Can be a challenge to get rid of, though usually a spritz from a water bottle will get them out, just like a kitty out of the fish pudding. They must give off some sort of vibe, as they drive even average people to letting strangers stay the night. Even I've been seduced, and liked it.
Cuddlewhore: A guy who hooks up with you only for the purpose of cuddling afterward. Can often be a touch sanctimonious, as they feel they've "paid" for the cuddling, by putting out. The water spritz won't work. There may not be a way out, as far as I'm aware. Prepare for dreams of gnawing your own arm off, and pray you brought a sedative.

Posted by jimbo at July 18, 2006 8:24 AM

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Comments

I will burn incense at the Jimbo-Bamber altar tonight.

Posted by: homer at July 18, 2006 12:28 AM

and i thought i had bought my last issue of out . . .

Posted by: jeremy at July 18, 2006 2:15 AM

Is this your first stalking? I'm so proud.

::wiping tear:: Our little Jimbo is growing up.

Posted by: swedeandczech [TypeKey Profile Page] at July 18, 2006 8:15 AM

Damn he is one hot man....

Posted by: Scott at July 18, 2006 11:44 AM

Did you know that Jamie's going to be a guest of honor at GenCon this year? You can stalk him in person! (But remember: he's mine... I saw him first! ;)

http://www.gencon.com/2006/indy/events/guests/media.aspx

Posted by: Brian in Indy at July 18, 2006 2:25 PM

I am SO not a cuddler. Up and OUT.

Posted by: Joe.My.God. at July 18, 2006 3:44 PM

Rob and I got to meet him at SHORELEAVE a couple of weeks ago.

Nice guy.. but he is shorter than me.. I though he was taller.

He was also in the mens room at the same time Rob and I were.

Posted by: Dax at July 18, 2006 9:51 PM

Jim-bo, you can have Bamber as soon as I finish cuddling with him ... say in 20-30 years? And we don't mind if you stalk him, just clean the nose prints (and whatever else) off the bedroom windows when you leave the outside of our home.

;-)
Rob

Posted by: Rob at July 19, 2006 12:43 PM

I will run my trusty chainsaw through all o' youze bitches before you lay a hand on my boytoy Bamber. We're friends, and I love you and all.

Still. Seriously. Back. The. Fuck. Up.

Bitches.

S!

Posted by: Sean. Spelled the Right Way. at July 20, 2006 3:56 AM