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March 3, 2006
Who rule Bartertown? JIMBO rule Bartertown!!!
Remember that 1985 film Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome? Not only did it feature Tina Turner in a role as post-apocalyptic mayor Auntie Entity (in various fabulous chain mail outfits), but it also provides many good quoteable quotes, and also gave good lessons in dipolomacy and politics. I managed to find an instructor's lesson plan for a systems analysis class using the film as a case study.
Anyway, I have a Bartertown situation going on at home. Upstairs, Auntie Entity, Ironbar and and Mad Max control the radiator heat. It is warmer upstairs and they are trying to save money, so they rarely turn it on. Much like MasterBlaster, I live in the basement unit, and have been freezing my ass off lately. When the temperature outside drops below freezing, it gets pretty cold in the basement, and my space heaters just don't do the trick. Plus I think my heat is simply going upstairs, heating them and making them feel content that everything is fine. Considering the radiator heat is more efficient and heats more effectively than my space heaters, we would all benefit if they turned on the frackin' radiators once in a while. I pay $1000/mo. in rent, I want some frakkin' heat. I served my time with the Peace Corps on the Siberian steppes, I know when I want my warm comfy home. I am and have been over being cold for quite some time.
I have been nice, diplomatic, polite and communicative in my numerous requests that they turn the heat on when it is below freezing outside. Most nights my requests go unnoticed or ignored. One night I swear my bedroom temperature was hovering around the low 50s.
CORRECTION: Tonight as I type with numb hands and the temperature drops to 28 outside, my thermometer marks a brisk 48 degrees inside.
However, while they control the heat, the main water valve for the entire house is in my unit. I consider home temperature part of the 'shelter' category in the basic needs of wildlife (shelter, space, food, water, etc.), and perhaps it's time they learn a lesson in both empathy and politics. My options in diplomacy bring to mind one phrase used by the character MasterBlaster in the Thunderdome film:
"Embargo on! Main valve off!
Four, three, two. . . .
Who run Bartertown?"
JIMBO RUN BARTERTOWN!!!
Welcome to another edition of Thunderdome!
Listen on! Listen on!
This is the truth of it:
Fighting leads to killing,
and killing gets to warring.
And that was damn near
the death of us all.
Look at us now, busted up
and everyone talking about hard rain.
But we've learned by the dust
of them all. Bartertown's learned.
Now when men get to fighting,
it happens here.
And it finishes here.
Two men enter, one man leaves.
And right now,
I've got two men.
Two men with a gut full of fear.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. . .
. . .dying time's here!
Posted by jimbo at March 3, 2006 10:38 AM
Comments
Just keep turning off the water and claim you thought it was the radiator valve... they might get the hint.
Posted by: tony at March 3, 2006 11:58 AM
I love heat. And, in a number of states there is a minimum temp that a rental can be at. I think here in Mass it's 69 degrees...? Anyway, i'm pretty sure there is a law in DC that addresses this.
In NY i once rented a second apartment that i would stay at during layovers and during brief trips to the city. Little did i know that *my* thermostat was the *only* thermostat for about 5 other flats on the floor (one per floor). So, i had been unknowingly freezing my poor neighbors, whilse saving the landlord a shitload of cash.
Honestly, i'd be furious beyond words.
Shut 'em off and teach them who has the greater power. Or, to borrow an IDF method, when struck, strike back three times as hard.
Most people backdown in the face of determined opposition, and will easily submit. ;-]
rob@egoz.org
Posted by: rob adams at March 3, 2006 12:05 PM
Why sure enough, there is a law for minimum home temperatures:
"If the heat in your apartment is not under your control, the law dictates that the landlord must keep your apartment at a minimum 68 degrees Fahrenheit between 6:30 a.m. and 11:00 p.m., and at a minimum 65 degrees the rest of the time."
Posted by: jimbo at March 3, 2006 12:09 PM
Ah yes, the summer of '85, when every pop-radio station played Tina's "We Don't Need Another Hero," five times an hour. That song will now be in my head the rest of the day! :-)
Posted by: Bob at March 3, 2006 1:05 PM
"Ain't we a pair, raggedy man?"
Posted by: Joe.My.God. at March 3, 2006 1:05 PM
You don't know your rights as DC tenant and you've been living here how long? ;-) I've used that little sentence on more than one occasion, even gotten rent back for it.
Still since the problem appears to lie with your co-tenants rather than the landlord, maybe your strategy will work better.
Posted by: copperred at March 3, 2006 4:18 PM
Know your rights!
DC Tenent's Guide to Safe and Decent Housing
http://dcra.dc.gov/dcra/frames.asp?doc=/dcra/lib/dcra/information/forms_docs/pdf/tenantguide.pdf&group=1697&open=%7C33466%7C
Posted by: DC Tenent's Guide to Safe and Decent Housing at March 3, 2006 6:11 PM
Just be sure your lease is all up to date - in case somebody ends up playing dirty. But doesn't eveyone play dirty in Thunderdome?
Posted by: ZZ at March 3, 2006 6:18 PM
Damm that is crazy. Have you given your complaint or request in writing? That way there is a record incase you need to go the legal route.
Posted by: Dax at March 3, 2006 7:23 PM
Are there any other ways that they can make your life miserable if they decided to retaliate? If so, this might end up being a fight maybe worth fighting in November, but not in March when the problem will soon solve itself anyway.
But, regardless, since the landlord has a legal duty to ensure that your apartment is heated, I would take it up with him/her and put the onus on him to make sure that the rule is enforced - even if you have to repeatedly call him at 2am to complain when it isn't. The upstairs people have no obligation to you - their obligation is toward the landlord because their obligation to turn up the thermostat for the entire house comes with their rental of their apartment from him. If it came down to legal action, your case would be against him, not them. Ask them nicely, document it, and if it doesn't happen report their asses to the landlord. If he doesn't respond, take him to court. No reason for you to be an asshole just because they are.
Posted by: Andy at March 3, 2006 8:09 PM
You know if the hottie upstairs would just come downstairs and curl up with you, you wouldn't have to worry about heat. That would even the score.
Posted by: copperred at March 3, 2006 10:44 PM
I love when they play "wheel of fortune" lol or whatever it was called... though i felt awful when they beat the crap out of the big guy - poor guy, it actually made me sad, "he's like a child"
now if i were you i would definite wait until like a nice cold monday morning so they have to freeze before work and cut themselves shaving with ice water - besides they shouldn't be shaving anyhow!
either that or have loud sex constantly
Posted by: TOS at March 3, 2006 10:59 PM
Wait... How are utilities paid? Are you spliting the gas bill? The water bill? Doesn't matter. Warmth good and it is up to your landlord to make sure you are not found dead and frozen in your apartment.
By the by, where is the main electrical switch?
Posted by: Marie at March 3, 2006 11:01 PM
Your first and foremost duty as a good tenant is to protect the landord's property. If I found the temperature headed downward I would immediately turn off the main water valve in order to prevent the pipes from freezing and bursting. I am pretty sure water starts freezing at around 60 degrees.
Posted by: Herb at March 4, 2006 9:06 AM
The most important question . . . if I were to send you the MP3 track of Tina Turner's Thunder Dome ("We don't need another hero, we don't need another way home, all we want is what's beyond, the Thunder Dome"), could you set your blog to music?
As an aside, I haven't had to use my heat at all this winter. Not sure why, but my unit on the second floor stays warm and stuffy. I usually have a window open. Not to gloat or anything.
Posted by: Boo Augustus at March 4, 2006 9:22 AM
Oh, and I offer to carry you around on my back if you want to go for the authentic Master/Blaster look. Although that could get a little wierd if the granola jew hottie comes downstairs.
Posted by: Boo Augustus at March 4, 2006 9:27 AM
Some people just can't take a hint. I think your idea of the more direct approach is well warranted. I'll bet it only has to happen twice before they take the hint.
Posted by: moby at March 5, 2006 12:53 PM
Please post part-two soon.
Posted by: rob adams at March 5, 2006 6:43 PM
We don't need another hero.
Posted by: Naked Boy at March 6, 2006 7:11 PM