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January 29, 2005

"Staff 2001."

What is wrong with the leaders of this country? Cheney showed up at Friday's gathering of world leaders in southern Poland to mark the 60th anniversary of the liberation of Auschwitz wearing the following:

The vice president, however, was dressed in the kind of attire one typically wears to operate a snow blower.

Cheney stood out in a sea of black-coated world leaders because he was wearing an olive drab parka with a fur-trimmed hood. It is embroidered with his name. It reminded one of the way in which children's clothes are inscribed with their names before they are sent away to camp. And indeed, the vice president looked like an awkward boy amid the well-dressed adults.

Like other attendees, the vice president was wearing a hat. But it was not a fedora or a Stetson or a fur hat or any kind of hat that one might wear to a memorial service as the representative of one's country. Instead, it was a knit ski cap, embroidered with the words "Staff 2001." It was the kind of hat a conventioneer might find in a goodie bag.

Add that to swearing on the floor of the House/Senate (I forget), which is just peachy. Dick. Is this part of a concerted effort to move positive diplomacy back to the dark ages? What a fucking insensitive, asinine, arrogant demonstration of leadership. Jeez...if jimbo would have a clue as to how to dress to commemorate a solemn ceremony with world leaders, this guy should too. Our country is so fucked for the next four years. WHAT WERE YOU VOTERS THINKING!?!? Aaaagh!

Doozy of a date tonight. I'm not mad about it, just relieved it's over. Hit the 'eject' button ASAP and ran to the gym and kept on running on the treadmill. Thank God it was only coffee and not a full meal. He seemed all right online, nice on the phone, and cute too. We have more than a few things in common. But when we sat down at Caribou he was fidgety and couldn't make eye contact. At first I thought it was me, and politely supported the conversation on my own despite agonizingly long silences. As soon as I hit the bottom of the coffee cup I declared it was time to go, and as soon as we left the joint he finally thaws out. Later he tells me that an old coworker from like 10 years ago was sitting next to us, and he was very nervous about it. Add that to a few things he said during the date like, "All my friends are straight," and that his roomates are all straight led me to believe he is quite closeted. My sources in the field tell me that "he doesn't kiss," a high indicator of issues with closet cases. Before the date I offered locations to meet that were gay or gay friendly, and now I know he just didn't want to be seen in such GAY GAY GAY places. After being out for almost 15 years now, I cannot fathom such levels of emotional and mental constipation. All that shit is so behind me now.

Now, I have my straight friends and my gay friends, and they all know I'm a big giant homo. The family does too. A flaming faggot, a cocksucking queer. Fuck me, suck me, and why don't you bend over after that too. I think I'm so far out of the closet I can no longer comprehend cloistering myself in heterosexuality as this guy was, so it was a bit of a shock to experience his bizarre turmoil. At my age and experience I should have seen that one coming though. As Tony said to me on the street afterwards, "Sounds like he knows where the Christmas presents are hidden." That's the first time I've heard that one.

I'm only a little disappointed that the date went that way, but I'm very glad I'm so free compared to him. Seeing where I could be, or perhaps was so long ago was very liberating. I'm a pretty happy big giant faggot gay man, and I love it. Perhaps if more grumpy out gay men took brief field trips back into the closet, we'd be more satisfied and happy with how far we've come.

Posted by jimbo at January 29, 2005 12:49 AM

Comments

Well there is a simple reason why Dick was so stupidly dressed- someone accidently sent him off to Poland with a Gestapo uniform and at the last moment he realized that kinda sight gag probably wouldn't go over so well.

Posted by: homer at January 30, 2005 12:43 PM

Personally, I kinda like how he was dressed.

Undeniably, it's not a good image for the U.S. in general, but I have always had a problem with the whole 'sunday's best' thing. Honestly, to me, 'nice' clothes don't look nice (minus a suit & tie fetish I have from time to time). I always think it is great when people choose comfort over tradition, and the Dick scored points with me. I mean, I still think he is one of the most horrible people alive, but I like his style.

Posted by: Kevin at January 30, 2005 11:10 PM

Jimbo, not to be a prick, but Dick Cheney was probably dressed that way because of his heart. Older men and women who have had to deal with heart failure are adversely affected by the cold, much more so than strapping young bucks like you. In all likelihood, he had to wear those silly furs and fluffy coats to remain warm, since the severe cold really will stress his heart. Give the man a break.

I don't know about his hat, but again, warmth had to be an overwhelming factor. Those wonderful slavic fur hats don't cover the ears (and if Dick did have them down over his ears, what would the reaction from such snarky press have been?).

Also, notice in the piece the snobby use of the passive voice to express disdain. Notice also how not a single quote from the event was printed. Could the Post not find even one person there pissed off that a Vice President with a weak heart was a little paranoid about winding up in the hospital? They couldn't, and so ran with general disdain in lieu of an actual story.

Also, Dick told Pat Leahy, one of the most sanctimonious and anti-technology senators in all of congress, to fuck off. While Cheney was out of line, Leahy did indeed deserve it, since the man is a dick (heh, ironic).

Posted by: Josh at January 31, 2005 1:59 AM

Josh, that's a pretty flimsy excuse for a 'Staff 2001' cap and hiking boots. Now if his clothes got lost in the flight, that's one thing, but there _are_ tailors in Poland. And you can dress sharp and be warm - wool is a wonderfully adaptable fabric that keeps you warm better than any material, and it comes in many cuts and styles. If Cheney can't figure out how to represent this county, look good, and stay warm, he's not fit for the job. That appearance was a total embarassment to this country. It is a sad day when Jimbo can dress the vice president to be both warm and fashionable, but I could do a far better job than him. The Post did a fine job of running him over the coals for that stunt, as he deserved. It wasn't the best journalism, but it needed to be pointed out, and I'm glad they did it. There is no excuse for how he was dressing, except perhaps last minute mishap.

Posted by: jimbo at January 31, 2005 2:10 AM

I maintain it's a tempest in a teapot. The Post didn't (couldn't?) find anyone from the event itself who was offended at the VP, and you hate the man. Is he capable of doing anything right in your eyes? More to the point, should he care?

Posted by: Josh at January 31, 2005 2:30 AM

I'm with Jimbo. Jacques Chirac was tastefully dressed and he's no "young buck". Indeed if the Auschwitz survivors, most probably in more poor health than Dick, could dress appropriately and still warmly, so could he. He could have worn just about anything and been warm. Respect for the living or dead, isn't exactly this administration's strong suit.

You might be surprised to know that Dick's poor style choice did not show up in the French press(not even lefty Le Monde). In part I'm sure because no one would believe that any head of state would behave so poorly, at least not since the Mongol hordes last blew through.

When you go to a funeral, you dress appropriately. There is no excuse for going to a memorial that was planned years in advance!

As to your date, I'm sorry to hear he couldn't have dragged himself out by now. The hunt continues unabated though? Le Tigre have a great line on their latest album in Viz that seems appropriate "...They call it coolness, we call it visibility,They call it way too rowdy, we call it finally free." You must have made him uncomfortable by just being out. Too rowdy, too there. Any future dates would have to take place at an undisclosed location :)

Posted by: copperred at January 31, 2005 9:55 AM

I don't hate the man, I'm just very embarassed for our country, and disgusted that he made such choices. I was upset about it because I expect better from our leaders, and our leaders should not be dressing more casually than I would at an important and international event. His choice of clothing is very symbolic of our country's leadership right now.

I am in marketing and communications. Symbolic and deliberate acts, appearance and delivery stand for a lot, especially in a diplomatic setting. He should care if he truly cared for the appearance and presentation of one of the supposed greater powers in the world.

Posted by: jimbo at January 31, 2005 10:37 AM

The article points out that Cheney had no problem dressing with dignity for the inauguration, so I really doubt that his health had anything to do with it.

It was really a tacky move by Cheney, but he's always indicated that he doesn't really care what other people, especially foreigners, think.

Posted by: Eric at January 31, 2005 10:52 AM

But Jimbo, as Copperred pointed out, not even the French, who seem to revel in finding faults with Americans, said anything nasty about Cheney's attire. Literally, only liberals in this country were pissed off. Not even opponents in adversarial countries seemed to care, though whether that's from mere acceptance ("oh, that dick is always like that") or genuine apathy can be argued.

Again: no one outside this country seemed to care.

Posted by: Josh at January 31, 2005 12:14 PM

I heard about the "Lost Luggage" excuse. He is the friggin Vice President! Not like the cracker was hurting for money, he could have bought proper attire while there. And I agree with Jimbo and the others.. you can dress warm while still looking stylish,dignified and appropriate. He has no excuse. It is an embarassment to our country that our representative can not properly dress for such an occasion.

Posted by: Dax at January 31, 2005 1:49 PM

Bad heart, age, lost luggage, etc... BottomLine: Dick fucked up. Bad heart-->throw a black shawl over that army-issued eskimo gear. Age-->If an outdoor winter ceremony is too much for the dear ol' 2nd in Command, than we have a Problem. LostLuggage--> that why he has all those high-priced aids flying in with him to go fetch him something presentable before the ceremony.

rob@egoz.org

Posted by: rob adams at February 2, 2005 10:01 AM