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June 14, 2004
nancy turned me into a crackwhore
The 24-7 All-Ronnie-All-The-Time Lovefest is over, Praise Allah, but one more memory clunked out of my brain from that time. The 'Just Say No To Drugs' campaign was in full effect when I was in like 7th grade or so. I recieved more information about drugs than I have EVER learned at any circut party, and until then had never taken anything worse than a mild overdose of children's asprin when I was 6.
In our 6th-grade health class we had full-color posters of uppers, downers, and drug paraphenalia - a poster for each. I have never seen 90% of these things in my lifetime, regardless of the shady crowds I've run with. I was fully educated on every kind of drug imaginable, and I learned it all from my 6th grade public education. Thank you Nancy Reagan for allowing me to never be swindled by a dealer, and for teaching me how to buy the good shit.
I think we spent like 3 weeks on this stuff. For one lesson, they had us tie a string to each of our index fingers, tie the other end of each string to a corner of an oven cooling rack, and then have someone else run a wooden spoon along the rack like a xylophone while our index fingers were plugged in our ears. Sure enough, it made a trippy sound. For another lesson they put this black-and-white swirly pattern cut-out on a 45 record turntable and turned it on. The swirling colors and patterns were fascinating.
The lessons were supposed to show us what drugs were like, and perhaps make us think it was stupid. I thought it was cool and I wanted to learn more - by experience. The War on Drugs backfired and didn't do all that much to prevent kids from using drugs, at least not in my case. I'm not saying lack of education would have been any better, but perhaps the funding could have been better spent on, say, more sex education during a time when people were dropping like flies from lack of education.
Posted by jimbo at June 14, 2004 9:41 AM
Comments
I wonder if they still do all of that drug crap. And do they include Viagra and Cialis? I can just image the interesting explanations and lessons on what can happen with those drugs, "Now Jimbo, you get to have the four hour erection today!"
Posted by: homer at June 14, 2004 1:20 PM
(raising hand in class emphatically) "Oooh! Teacher! Me! Me!" Too bad our P.E. teacher wasn't the health class instructor....
Posted by: jimbo at June 14, 2004 3:53 PM
Remember the time Nancy went on Different Strokes and told the kids not to do drugs. Then Arnolds friend with the red hair said he smoked.
Good times.
Posted by: Adam at June 15, 2004 5:22 PM
And then Todd Bridges went to jail...was it for crack? I know after he cleaned up he was up against Vanilla Ice in the Celebrity Smackdown. All because of Nancy Reagan.
Posted by: jimbo at June 16, 2004 10:58 AM
Like Nancy never popped a few nebutal with a splash of chablis after a hard day of fittings at Adolfo.
Please.
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