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December 31, 2002
The Year In Review
OK, I'll lighten up with a year in review:
Best Gift From God: tremendous ego-boosting post-breakup date playin' pool, drinkin' beer and smokin' cigars with this guy.
Squandered Gift From God: totally flustered and completely forgetting above mentioned stud's name AND where my car was parked after offering him a ride home.
Best Game: 7's rugby match in June, where I made a goal and impressed guys twice my size.
Biggest Blog Faux Pax: publicly embarrassing at least five guys from above said tournament in blog entry...even though they are still pretty hot for straight guys.
Biggest Waste of Time: spending probably about 25% of 2002 playing Civilization III.
Best Bloody Moment: Taking a hit in the temple in a rugby match in Richmond, 9 stiches and a black eye for a month.
Best Beer: all of it in Manchester, England.
Best Metaphor: toasted marshmallows - close to the fire or evenly browned?
Best Scream of Agony: a sound I'd rather forget - Monkey when his femur dislocated from his pelvis in San Fran.
Best Concert: Shiela E. at the Lisner
Best Sign: anti-WTO protest protester holding up a sign that said: "Welcome Rich White Kids"
Favorite Movie: Attack of the Clones (was that in 2002?)
Bestest Bloggurls Met This Year: Bubba, Glennalicious, Donna, Dawgpoet, Spin, Sam, The Chest and NuJewReview.
DC Bloggurls Unite: Dicktard, Fitz, Donna, Chrisafer, DC.dork, Mad Monkey, My'ra, Stebbins and Spin.
Biggest Wake-Up Call: watching a guy fall out on G during a Cherry event at Titan, pooping his pants and puking in front of everyone, being hauled out by his parents (he's in his 40s), then RETURNING to the dance an hour later.
Best (and only) Camping Trip: Dolly Sods Wildnerness in the Monongahela National Forest with this gang.
Best Stalking Trip: no Fullmer, but plenty of others to see at my annual trip to Camden Yards with Shane and Al.
Posted by jimbo at 1:18 PM | Comments (3)
December 30, 2002
2002: The Year That Sucked
I'm bundling Sept. 11, 2001 and the months that followed into 2002, since that's when things really started going downhill. I'd like to give a hearty 'fuck you' to 2002, since you really sucked, 2002.
However, things are improving in a timely fashion, and I'm looking forward to 2003. It's going to be a year of recovery, one to get back on my feet and restore my damaged ego and self esteem. 2002 was a humbling year, but I learned a lot about myself, my abilities and friends.
When I lost my job in February 2002, I could not forsee how long it would take to get another job, or how it would affect me. Others are not so lucky, with periods of unemployment for up to two years. I took five or so temporary jobs which allowed me to sustain myself throughout the year. Some of them sucked, some of them were interesting, and I can say I learned a lot from them too. Doorman, cabana boy, Senior Staple Remover, budget gurl and polyp donor were my titles in 2002.
In 2002 I learned the value of goodness in people. Friends, family, strangers, acquaintances and even enemies reached out above and beyond the call of everyday duties to help me out. Job leads, resume review, financial help, temp jobs and moral support all came in like gangbusters. Had I met no one in the six years I've been living in DC I would never be where I am today. But with a good circle of friends, bloggurls, the rugby team and people I hardly even know, I was able to get through the hard times.
And hard they were. My thoughts went to some very dark places at times, and I didn't think I'd get through them all. Panic, anxiety, rage and fear all went through my head at varying intensities. A strong midwestern identification with career added to a severe inferiority complex.
Constant changes also put me in spheres where I met lots of new people. Changing patterns in everyday life and more spare time allowed me to get to know a lot of new friends throughout the year. For the friends I'd had and the ones I met, I am now far richer in the new year, regardless of the credit card bills and car payments.
Resolutions: as I've mentioned before, I don't make them on a particular date - I make them throughout the year and most have already been made. With such instability going on, it was hard to make any resolution beyond 'get a job' this year. But now that's accomplished, I can move forward: pay off credit card bills, be frugal, be in shape by the spring rugby season and get myself on the starting lineup again, tackle better, show no fear on the pitch, adopt a more professional work attitude, get my fucking swollen tonsils removed, gain muscle mass.
Some things are better left off the resolution list for various reasons. Career craziness in 2002 has exhausted that part of me, and I'll be content in this new job for at least a year. Dating? Still not sure if I'm ready for it yet - the last relationship did a number on me, and the slightet blindside from men still set me off badly. I know I'm not ready to trust, expose myself or invest my emotions on anyone that I know of. That's OK, because a long period of fun and freedom makes you ready for when the commitment comes. That and a rebuilding of a strong identity is healthy once the time comes.
However, I know a lot more of what I want in a relationship now, and how to express those needs. I know of what to avoid as well.
Here's to 2003, the year of recovery. May 2002 not be forgotten, but surely learned from.
Posted by jimbo at 12:29 PM
December 29, 2002
unremarkable joy
Last night I hauled myself out to Nation and used my last Get Into Nation Free card. It was terribly stuffy, smoky, crowded and loud there, but luckily Kim English showed up at a reasonable hour. She's a big girl, but lots of fun and genuinely joyful. She performed three numbers and by then I was ready to leave. No remarkable stories to note from the evening, I was outta there by 2am.
Posted by jimbo at 3:54 PM
December 28, 2002
International Jimbo Day
Happy Birthday to me! It was tough rousing myself outta bed this morning, as we had a few last night at Cobalt. My 32 years shows when a mere four cocktails hampers me so. Free admission and drinks for Jimbo, in recognition of International Jimbo Day. We may not be so lucky tonight at Nation.
So we got going a little late, and unknowingly I got my sweet revenge at Gurl, who is driven to madness when late for a film. Especially geeky films. Note to self: be as late a possible for sci-fi films with Gurl. I don't like missing the previews either, but you can't rush a slightly hungover jimbo who needs to feel pretty in the morning, especially on his birthday. Add to the fact that I somehow misjudged which major street the Uptown was on, and we barely got there in time for the opening credits.
Vonnie DuBois broke The Rule and got me a gift. But it was soo good I can't hate her for it: a $50 food gift certificate for Fresh Fields (Mmmm...you've been reading my blog! I will eat heartily and get Huge) and Neverwinter Nights, which, sadly, I won't be able to install on my aging PC until I get more processing speed. I can't even play Civ on a map larger than the average setting, as it takes too long between turns. How can I even hope to play multiplayer with both Civ and NWN? We'll figger something out...
LOTR was pretty good, especially Gollum, which was suprising. Lotsa cool battle scenes and beasties. I want a Nordic hall like the one on the hill, I forget the name of the village. Is it still there? Buy it for me, thanks. Those wooden carvings on the rooftops are FABULOUS! Anyhoo, I really liked the oliphants...I want one of those too. I'll name him Stampy. The storyline was a bit scrambled, but at least they didn't skimp on the ents. Got to see them tear town Isengard, which was fun. And Gollum promissess for uss to ssee Shelob in the next film!
Posted by jimbo at 8:46 PM | Comments (4)
December 27, 2002
Die, Bitch!
So my bestest, sweetest, most evillest gurlfriend Gurl spends her day at work online summoning my #2 and #5 stalking victims with her magic wand to her masturbatorium today, JUST TO TORMENT ME!!! For those of you who know her, please use the phrase "DIE, BITCH!" in the subject header to any e-mails you may send to her for a week or so. Thanks.
While I have all the information and the means to summon up her #1 obsession, I just can't bring myself to do it. No, not because I'm nice, it's just that while her #1 obsession in DC is very handsome and built and nice, he's also hairless like a grape and quite dull. My laziness factor overrides my evileness in this case.
BUT, my bestest, sweetest, most evillest gurlfriend Gurl did get me CivIII: Play the World AND tickets for Lord of the Rings: the Two Towers for this Saturday, Dec. 28 for the 11am showing at the Uptown theatre in DC. If I missed any of y'all in an e-mail, git your tickets online and we'll see you there!
NO GIFTS, NO CARDS (I'll be 32 on the 28th)!!! I already have everything I need (CivIII: Play the World, a DVD player, my health, a job, and plenty of food and sex) so your lovely presence is all that's required. Your abilities to listen to me whine for a year and job leads were generous enough. Plus, y'all've been running around this time of year - don't bother running to CVS for a Mahogany card for Jimbo's birthday at the last minute.
Should I get a sufficient Disco Nap, Kim English (Unspeakable Joy and various other crack-songs) is performing LIVE at Nation that evening...who's game?
Posted by jimbo at 12:50 AM | Comments (8)
December 26, 2002
it let snow
I had a mellow Christmas eve and day for the most part. I started driving up to Baltimore Tuesday evening in the 'snowstorm', vowing that if the traffic on the BW Parkway slowed to under 30mph I would turn around. No sense in driving 2 hours to a party. Sure, the road was slushy but y'all didn't need to drive so damn slow, so I turned around.
I blew Wednesday by spending most of the day playing Civ. The roads were better that evening so when I went up to BWI to pick up Gurl it was a more pleasant experience. When we got back we went to Biddy MacFurghahans' for a nice Irish dinner (Mmm...Guiness) with Honest John. John is so painfully honest he kills me. He just says it like it is, a very rare thing in DC. He can be a bit lascivious at times, but is generally refreshing. And he pays for dinner too. Important note: Jimbo is eternally grateful when you feed him. That's how my ex snagged me. Not through my dick, heart or mind, but through my stomach.
However, a wierd thing happened at dinner. This young Chandraesque girl came up to us and started chatting. At first I thought she was drunk and hitting on one of us (honey, puh-leez!), but then I realized she was up to something. She said the guy she was talking to at the bar was Antonio Banderas, and asked if we wanted to chat. Obviously, she wasn't a DC native, for when you see someone somewhat famous or powerful out on the town, you just don't go up to them like a bumpkin and start chatting it up - it's just not done here, as I'm sure is the same in L.A. or NYC. It wasn't Banderas either - his plastic surgery was better than the real thing.
She obviously thought she was witty and pulling some prank a la Jackass or something. It kinda backfired as the Three Wise Queens had finer wool to be pulled over their eyes. I was incensed at her assumption that we were fools, but John and Gurl took it in stride. I should have walked up to the faux Banderas when we left saying "Hey, your friend says you're Chris O'Donnell, and you're lookin' for some Holiday Action tonight, wanna come home with me?" But I didn't.
It was an interesting study in Jimboism. I flipped out at the immorality of the exchange, while it slipped off John and Gurl. I get the impression that people think I'm Miss Manners or a 10th level Lawful Good Paladin sometimes (sans warhorse and +3 Holy Defender lonsword).
I guess it's due to my upbringing and circle of friends growing up. I am a bit naive...the ex was continually amused by my wonder at some social complexities. My youth was generally blissful and idyllic, and even then I was ignorant of many things going on right under my nose.
So wrongs disturb me, and I don't think practical jokes and the like are funny. They are done at the expense of others, which is inherently wrong. When someone in a bar tells me "I like to fuck with people," I try to get away from them as soon as possible. I just don't get that kind of behavior. I am quick to judge and declare righteous statements about others, and it takes a long time to prove me wrong.
But you should meet some of my posse from Western Wisconsin. Travis the Righteous comes to mind. He makes me look impartial. On one Luther League youth ministry trip to San Antonio, we went to Sea World and were settling down to watch Shamu (v.3.0) show his stuff. Before the show the announcer stated that there was no smoking in the auditorium. Someone was puffing away right in front of us, and Little Mr. Teen Morality Travis tapped him on the shoulder and stated "Excuse me, there's no smoking here." Another time, when we were driving to the mall for some Midwest mayhem, Travis was disappointed that the folks in front of us were driving a few miles under the speed limit. Shouting out the car window, he judged them "It's the pedal on the RIGHT!". These are the people who shaped my life.
Posted by jimbo at 11:57 AM | Comments (1)
December 24, 2002
The Night Before Christmas
(a true story, c1979)
'Twas the night before Christmas
at Grandmother's pad
everyone eating ham
and Jimbo being bad.
Merely nine years old,
he was excited as hell
to open his gifts
and his stocking as well.
So he didn't chew his ham
nor his oyster stew
and when he went to bed
the contents would spew.
Onto his bed
and into his sheets
little chunks of ham
and after dinner treats.
He walked to the stairs
at the second floor,
and puked with flair
all down the stairs to the door.
So let this be a lesson
to you and your kind:
be sure to chew dressing
and digest your ham rinds.
Posted by jimbo at 1:42 PM
ho ho ho
This morning I roused myself up early enough to go help Richard with his new character. He's got a really good character idea, and I think things are set with the new player. Didn't make it to the gym afterwards though...too chilly and cloudy out today.
Tonight I go up to Baltimore for a rugby party, stay overnight there and then pick up Gurl tomorrow at BWI. Dinner with friends and then possibly going out with Ron somewhere.
Happy Holidays!
Posted by jimbo at 1:03 PM | Comments (2)
December 23, 2002
Xanadu
1980. The dawn of MTV. HBO had already been on for a few years, and 'lil 10 year-old Jimbo lay nestled on the couch, wrapped in an afghan, watching Xanadu for the 7th time in a row, eyes wide with wonder. Our scene opens with a conversation between Jimbo, his brother, and Jimbo's deeply suppressed Inner Queen:
Jimbo: Mmm...rollerskates.
Brother: Why do you keep watching that movie?
Inner Queen: Because it's the first musical to come out in years, and America has been dying for one. Does Gene Kelly mean nothing to you? Your uncultured mind cannot comprehend the cultural significance this motion picture will have. Because Olivia Newton-John is going to be a Diva some day. Because E.L.O. does the soundtrack, and Jeff Lynne is going to survive the 80's, eventually to produce George Harrison's final album. Because Don Bluth, who does the animated sequence will one day produce entire animated feature films. Because it's fucking fabulous, that's why!
Jimbo: Uhh, I dunno.
Brother: It's like a rollerskating muscial or something.
Inner Queen: Silence, Breeder. Your incessant prattling sickens me. This is the scene where the muses debut those darling sheer pastel blouses for the "I'm Alive" number, WHILE DANCING ON ROLLERSKATES! Go busy yourself with a wrestling cheerleader
Jimbo: It's kinda cool.
Posted by jimbo at 11:37 AM | Comments (5)
December 22, 2002
star trek: numbesis
Gurl & Co. got me a DVD player and the CivIII: Play the World expansion CD! My first DVD ever is Purple Rain! Haven't even opened the DVD player yet, as I've still been playing through all the scenarios in Civ.
Last night my roomate and I went to see Star Trek: Nemesis. It wasn't the worst Star Trek, but pretty close to the bottom of the pack. The villian wasn't that scary, and some of the dialouge was very cheesy. They coulda played up the really nasty death-by-acne weapon they had, and played down the whole mirror image of Picard thing. And they coulda played up Deanna Troi's psychic violation storyline, and allowed her to kick some ass when she was temporarily in control of the bridge. Troi fires photon cannons! That woulda been cool.
While it was retro 70's and 80's night at Nation, I did a late night energy assessment and decided to pass on it. I'll try to save up my boogie karma for the 28th, when Kim English performs for my birthday! So instead I went out to the Eagle, as I needed more of a "results-oriented" evening. No such luck. There was one object of attraction there, but his conversation was halting, so I tried something new. Instead of ending the chat with "it was nice talking to you", I just turned around and left. If ya can't even be civil, yer not worth my time or energy.
Stebbins was there, however, and we had some nice gurl chat, and I went home by midnight. On the phone was a considerate message from Glennalicious, who's in town for the weekend, and I might see him some time today.
Posted by jimbo at 12:32 PM
December 21, 2002
wobble board god
I stared slack-jawed at the Demigod of Rough Edges, Core Body Workout and Cowlicks today in the gym as he did deadlift squats with two 45# plates on each end - WHILE PERFECTLY BALANCED ON THE WOBBLE BOARD. He last now been upgraded to God status.
Later, after my running and sprinting anaerobic recovery session on Corcoran Street (which you and you should be doing RIGHT NOW!) He strolled by and I had to chat with him about it. After the brief chat, He introduced himself, and we shook hands! His name is Chris. I 
Chris! I'm shaky now from the sprints and from talking to Him! My inner 14-year old girl is gleeful, and I'm not washing my hand for a week! Tee-hee!
Posted by jimbo at 4:47 PM | Comments (1)
December 20, 2002
cleaning up
"You gotta love the concept of Jimbo, if not Jimbo, himself."
And they do. I GOT THE JOB!!! I start January 6, so have plenty of time to chill out on the dole. Just got the call for the offer, which is survivable, but nowhere near what I used to earn. They promise that there's lots of room for promotion potential if I'm a good boy. And I will be. It's been a long year where I've learned the value of a lot of things I took for granted back in tha day. Oh, the job is doing tech training and documenation for a downtown firm about a block away from Don. Can you say let's do lunch?
And MANY THANKS to all of you who sent job leads and support. It's really tough searching for a job and being jobless for so long, and little bumps of cheerleading help out a lot.
Looking at my bedsheets today, I realized the veneer of grease on them was getting a little gross, so I did some laundry. Also washed the car, and had a good lunch courtesy of my bud Steve. Tonight I'm having a little Christmas party with my bestest gurl Gurl, and then I'm going to drag them out to celebrate!
I got Mom's holiday package from the post office today. Cheese curds, snickerdoodles and a small harness...Mom, what's that for? It doesn't fit me, maybe I'll give it to Pronto. I don't know if Fitz and Will go to MAL, but at least Pronto can.
My work comes to fruition: new Renegades photo gallery pics for all you stalkers of queer rugby players.
Posted by jimbo at 6:04 PM | Comments (4)
December 19, 2002
a reason to blog again
Don't call it a comeback...I been here for years!
I was all ready to pout my way through the holidays and take a break from blogging, the Internet, and Internet People. Thus the temporary blog hiatus. But today I got some very good news, news worth blogging about. The company I interviewed for last week, the one where stinky Mike is leaving, called me today to say they're ready for an offer, once they call my references up. I don't know what they're going to offer, and I have a feeling it's not what I'd like, but I'll make sure it's what I need.
My mood has improved greatly as a result, as expected. After almost a year of unemployment, I can start to integrate back into the world of the insured and the employed - so happy to not put the "un-" in front of either. Re-adjustment is going to take a while, but the journey will be relieving.
Just finished three days temping at Don's workplace. Don is a physician at the Rectal Polyp Mining Institute of Washington, DC. I guess I should back up a bit. There's a lot of stem cell research going on, mainly up in Bethesda, MD. Stem cell research and 'mining' as they call it, is often wrought with controversy and protests. However, there is a cheaper, less controversial alternative to stem cell collection and mining: rectoplasts. You see, your rectal walls are lined with a stem cell-like layer of cells called rectoplasts. Rectalplasts can be used as substitute for stem cells in genetic research. Those poor individuals with continual hemorrhoidal discomfort tend to develop lots of 'rectal polyps'. Rectal polyps are chock-full of rectoplasts, and thus are a valuable alternative to stem cell research. I am a veritable gold mine of rectoplasts. Don's technique at rectal wall polyp mining is pretty painless...he even cracks jokes and calls me 'pixie' when I'm under the knife. I feel pretty smooth inside now. All in all it was an interesting experience, and the pay was generous too. Thanks Don!
Posted by jimbo at 8:42 PM | Comments (6)
December 17, 2002
standard man-hating blog entry
1:30am, can't sleep due to shifting my sleep patterns to noctournal. And I'm really pissed off. I need to look at the small print in my ICUII contract for the "Men Are Pigs" refund clause. Definitely taking a break from that program and online chat in general. Since I've begun to try and start dating again, I'm constantly reminded at how shitty dating can be. I've forgotten quite a lot about that.
I find it fascinating that guys with boyfriends have so much time to flirt online, and seem to forget to mention that they have boyfriends during hours of chatting. Shouldn't the revelation that a guy has a boyfriend come before sending four different cum shots?
And he has the gall to infer that I am a player. I'll have you know I was the best boyfriend I could be for two and a half years. I did not cheat. Gurl can attest to that as she got high on the popper fumes of temptation coming from my glands that night at Atlas as Mr. Deep Masculine Voice told me all the things he wanted to do to me. Weak in the knees, for sure, but I resisted.
The Devil Himself sent the Four Woofers of Jimbo's Apocolypse to tempt me on the eve of the MAL Dungeon Dance two years ago. But I was strong. Alone, all by myself, and no one would have known. Daddy wanted me, Hairy Chest Hunk in a Harness ogled me, Beefasaurus adored me, and Mr. Blonde Corn Fed asked to come home with me even when I was leaving the door of Nation that night. Drunken rugby parties, a handsome man in Manchester, come hither looks in the locker rooms. I was a very good boy for two and a half years.
But now I'm single, and will play how I want. But I'm honest about what I want, which is often more than some can handle, and far more than what most can give. I expect a lot from myself, but it seems that as long as I expect so little from people, I'm probably going to be angry for a long time.
But you gotta learn from all the pigs you meet, or else you let them take a piece away from you every time. Here's a chronological history of what I've taken from them, from past to present (c.1990-2002):
- Gary taught me it can take a decade for a man to come out of the closet.
- Dave taught me that married bi men lie - a lot.
- Kurt taught me about romance and feelings.
- Sigurd taught me about kindness.
- Ed taught me that even gay men can have horrible taste (black laquer furniture and "romantic" Narada cassettes).
- Carter taught me the importance of playing safe.
- Trevor taught me it's OK to be fabulous.
- Rick and Jonathan taught me not to fall for straight men.
- Leonard taught me that some straight men are interested...
- Greg taught me to stay clear of coke addicts who gamble.
- Pat taught me that rugby players can be cool about homos.
- Tom taught me about kink.
- Roger taught me that some men do not have a soul.
- Hugh taught me about betrayal.
- Sam taught me that some gay men hate themselves.
- Gil taught me that some men can't say goodbye.
- Keith taught me that smooth men can be fun too, but Princessness will not be tolerated.
- Todd taught me that I can make men cry.
- Larry taught me that being drunk on a first date is pretty pathetic.
- Scott taught me how to dress to kill.
- Kerry taught me how much men can have sex in a week.
- Rob taught me how drugs can flush your life down the toilet.
- Bob taught me how sad addiction can be.
- Dwayne taught me that some men live in their own fantasies.
- Tim taught me why messing around with coworkers is wierd.
- Nick taught me to avoid men who still live with or near their 'ex' boyfriends.
- Billy taught me that it's all about The Wedding, and not about the marriage.
- John taught me why some guys hang around the rugby team, but don't play much.
- Bubba taught me that starched shirts can be sexy...
- Michael taught me that you can come back from the edge.
- Steven taught me how much I've learned.
- Jim taught me that perfectly intelligent men playing blonde can be very unattractive.
- Jeff taught me not to trust any men under 25.
And you wonder why I need to play rugby again after being away for so long?
Posted by jimbo at 2:13 AM | Comments (5)
December 16, 2002
fixed the problem
Bubba speaks! Now if only we could hear from Spin. Blogging gestapo has spoken.
Fixed the problem with my demo site. Ahh, the power of tables. Forced the space around the form options so it fit on one page. How's it look on a Mac, y'all?
Posted by jimbo at 9:26 PM | Comments (2)
lazy coder cry for help
Anyone know of an alternative to overuse of drop-down menus? The client wants everything up front (I know, very bad). I want to avoid the javascript layering code, as it's way too wieghty.
Or, how do you control the spacing around option form tags? I can't get those select drop downs to be more cozy together. Urrrgh...argh! Suggestions are very welcome. In a nutshell, here's the case:
PROBLEM: drop-down menus taking up too much space, client insists on an overwhelming barrage of link options.
Basically, I want to please the customer and keep all the selections available, AND keep it all to one browser window 700X450 in size. But otherwise, how does it look?
Posted by jimbo at 3:35 PM | Comments (2)
spinning wheels
Saturday: played CivIII all day, worked out and ran, went to rugby party with Dictard. Everyone thought Dicktard was my straight buddy, cuz he's so butch. It was much more sedate than most of our parties, and everyone was actually dressed up. Rumour has it Carl puked is guts out later that evening from the 'nog. I distinctly remember him saying he doesn't drink. I showed some restraint myself with the drink, but oh, I cannot resist those Christmas cookies. Wish I could have watched Carl hurl, but grampaw jimbo was tired and took the Dicktard to the late-night short bus home, then went home to continue playing CivIII.
Sunday I called a bazillion people and generally got nothing done. Went to Woofy Mike's going away party, which was also remarkably sedate. I think everyone's quite burnt out from the holidays already. I managed to contain myself and not break down at Mike's departure. He says things look good where he works and that they liked me, they really did, so cross yer fingers. The Monkey was there too. Why can't you set your Monkey free? Went home and continued to play a winning game of Civ as Dictator Mao of the Chinese. I was running over everyone with my calvary units. After wiping Japan off the planet, the goddamn game froze without me having saved it. Arrrgh!
Tomorrow I will do some database temp work at Don's workplace. Oh, the ideas for blog entries are churning in my mind like the 'nog in Carl's stomach, ready to be regurgitated onto the blog in a chunky mess. Stay tuned.
Posted by jimbo at 12:30 PM
December 13, 2002
we're FAMOUS!!!
Don't everyone comment at once on how cute the new snowflake banner is. Please, hold your applause.
OhMyGodWe'reLikeIn MetroWeekly!!! Dicktard, me & The Chad. My dreamy buddy Ron is in that section too. Ron is geeky, woofy, has great legs, but also has a boyfriend in NYC. Grrrr. Why eat out when you can eat in?
So I finally go to the gym tonight, and was daydreaming through it all. I had the strange feeling I would meet someone tonight who I haven't seen in a long time. My intuition said that it would be someone from college for some reason. Later in the evening I went to Glenn's (Chrisafer's boyfriend) birthday party at DuPont Italian Kitchen. Afterwards we went to Cobalt. I got there a little bit ahead of the gang, and who was sitting there but our training director from Peace Corps! I haven't seen Parmer in quite some time. He was responsible for maintaining my sanity (in addition to RuPaul) while I was in Kazakstan, as he was one of the few gay men I knew there, and a regular confidante. We chatted for a long time, and he commented that I was 'svelte'. That's nice for 'skinny', mind you. Must eat more food! Anyway, we'll be hanging out more often soon.
Posted by jimbo at 11:24 PM | Comments (6)
adios woofy mike
'sob!' Our woofy, smelly, hypermasculine straight teammate Mike is leaving the team to go spend time with his rugby-playin' girlfriend in Japan. Going away party is Sunday, and I must maintain my composure, lest I break down into a tearful wreck at his departure. He's sweaty, smelly, chews tobacco, drinks tremendous amounts of beer, belches a lot and scratches his balls constantly, but we love him. After releasing flatulence during practice, he'll often comment "That's a ripper!" The nail in his proverbial hetrosexual coffin was when I was in a scrum with him, and smelled the familiar putrid scent of Old Spice. No queen ever uses Old Spice. He's a breeder, end of story.
Some of the rookie gurls on the team inevitably hit on him during the post-match socials when they get sloppy drunk, and he's man enough to politely decline, or just respond "No fuckin' way!" without getting hysterical. That's so cool, and typical of the other straight guys on our team.
You may roll your eyes, as do some of the less-sagacious hangers-on in our pack, and say "Honey, puh-LEEZ! The only reason they're on your team is to get blown." On the contrary, most of the handful of breeders on our team play with us either because the practices are conveniently located, as they live in the DuPont area, or because a gay buddy of theirs asked them to come check us out. One of the founding breeder Renegades, Pat ("Daddy"), confessed to me why he played with us as opposed to PAC or some other local team. "You guys have fun, you're not too serious about it." Well, we've tried to get more 'serious' lately, but we do know how to have fun, and we have the most fabulous collection of match rugbygear in the Potomac Rugby Union. Our post-match socials are also some of the best in the league. Our team constitution, excruciatingly written by a crack team of anal-retentive lawyer gurls, is now being used by USA Rugby as a model charter. Our skills and fitness levels may need improvement, but we've got our club shit together.
I digress. Mike served as our team captain this season, and was one of the few to work so very hard to get our mojo, fitness and teammanship up to par, and we had an impressive showing this year at the end of the fall season because of it. Despite his breeder status, he's considered "one of the gurls". We'll miss you Mike! (Side note: not missing an opportunity to schmooze for a job, it was Mike's job I interviewed for on Monday. This 'lil job vulture doesn't miss a beat!)
I made it through the unemployment office yesterday in a mere three hours! Turns out my pool of money from my airport webmaster job is still there until February, which is a good thing. Went out with Gurl and Jon last night to Shirtless Men Drink Free, and had a good time. I was "squirrelly", in my own words, and had to get out of the house. Conversation heard between two geeks (who shall go unnamed) last night:
G: "So, you wanna go see Star Trek X on Wednesday?"
J: "But isn't Enterprise on that night? We can't miss Enterprise!"
Priorities, priorities.
Phone interview today for the Wisconsin Historical Society web job. Huge website, lots of potential, and very demanding. They definitely have their shit together, and I was sure to ask about the stability of the position in these changing times. It would really suck if I got there and then the position was "frozen" due to the new Governor's whims. Warning to all job seekers: ask these questions about current budget crisis and job stability. It could come back to bite you later.
Posted by jimbo at 2:02 PM | Comments (3)
December 12, 2002
fruitful week
Introducing:
Chrisafer!
Damn...those DC bloggurls are comin' out of the woodwork this week. And now all they need is...CONTENT. Lord knows Chris surfs quite a lot to find enough content on the Web...
My, my, December is more fruitful than I expected. Got a call for a phone interview this morning for a webmaster position in Madison for the Wisconsin Historical Society. Again, not crazy about moving from DC for a job, as I like it here, but this joblessness is wearin' me down. I can't shake this WASP work ethic that makes me feel worthless without a job. That and money issues...anyhoo, the pay is quite generous (for Wisconsin) as it's a gub'ment job for the state, so it is appealing.
Got a lot done yesterday, and most of the galleries are done for the Renegades site. One more to go and then I can work on this other web job, which may be quite challenging. Spent far too much time online as well. Must integrate with real world today...
I called my favorite Dixie Chick yesterday. Awww...poor gurl. Yes, you are more of a mess than me these days, and that's pretty bad. Still your Soul Psychic Circuit Sister, going or gone through the same shit.
Watched "Extreme Makeover" last night, and was morbidly fascinated. They picked two women with schnozzes that would flatter a vulture. Didn't see much improvement with the guy though. He need more hair implants on the chest. Where would you take those from, yer pubes?
Speaking of unreality, did any of you gurls watch the Whitney Houston interview last week? I missed it, but heard it was also morbidly fascinating. How much of a mess is she? Please comment.
Goin' to the unemployment office today, as my appointment was cancelled last week due to the "snowstorm". My corpse can be found dessicated at the Rhode Island NW job center.
Posted by jimbo at 9:28 AM | Comments (6)
December 11, 2002
joe's take out
Hmm...don't know if shy boy Joe minds me linkin' to his blog, but his new design is TOO FABULOUS not to link!
Posted by jimbo at 1:05 PM
wet, wet, wet
Capricorn Horoscope (by Astrocenter.com)
Usually you may keep things mysteriously secret and for yourself, dear Capricorn. You just don't like to talk unless you really have something to say. But today, you may want to share your deepest thoughts with other people. Your very new and original ideas are worth it, and will help others to understand you better. Share your feelings, your concerns, and your plans with others today, you will see that things will look a lot more positive by tonight!
Yeah, whatever. Constructed a rant on the drive back and during my workout this morning, but decided against posting it. I'd probably edit or delete it by this evening anyway. Alignment has shifted to Neutral at the moment. For a while I've been Chaotic Evil every morning and then I slowly shift to Lawful Good by the evening.
While it was absolutely shitty out today, suprise, suprise, the Earth wasn't coated with a 1" layer of ice as reported by local news stations. The drive was fine, but wet. A great day to stay inside and finish up tons of web shit I have to do, like finishing some Renegades photo galleries. Must avoid looking for things like this while I'm working.
Posted by jimbo at 11:58 AM | Comments (2)
will work for huge
Wanted: personal training sessions to get Jimbo huge in exchange for Website design.
Icy outside this morning, and I have an 8am scheduled tune-up in Waldorf for the car. Ice Storm Media Panic on the DC news channels. Bah. You people sicken me. Jimbo took his driving test at sweet 16 in a major Wisconsin snowstorm. Jimbo took CDL bus driving test in equally shitty weather. Y'all are wussies. My only fear is other drivers on the road, particularly those from the rarely-icy South.
Pentagon boy called again this week, and muscly Army boy, new to DC, chimed in on AOL last night. Sorry, was over the Military Disconnect a week ago. Y'all don't know how to snuggle. In serious snuggle mode today. Not going into work today? Furry? In the mood to snuggle? Drop me a line.
Posted by jimbo at 6:52 AM | Comments (2)
December 10, 2002
holy awful website
Thank you Jeremy, for the job lead at this organization. Not only is it a lead, but the site itself gives me great hope that there is much work to do for a better than average ex-webmaster. Oh my god. What appears to be the association's logo is an ANIMATED .GIF, and the whole dang thing is as stark white as roomsixteen.com. And howabout some kind of adherence to a single font and design standard? If interviewed, must strive to not give the impression that my web design skills are godlike in comparison.
However, as a rugby player, it would be quite fitting to work for a spinal cord injury association.
Posted by jimbo at 3:06 PM | Comments (2)
the most wonderful time of the year
I think I know why people get blue around Christmas, or at least one of many reasons. We are constantly inundated by the media and retail ads that we MUST have a joyful time. If you find that you're not having the most wonderful time that you can possibly have as depicted on Hallmark specials and commercials, of course you're going to feel inadequate. You MUST be joyful, you MUST be with family and friends, and you MUST be cheerful! Why am I not filled with holiday cheer like the people on the Wal-Mart commercials? There must be something wrong with me.
For those of us who are stubborn and independent, we kinda get defensive about that. I'm going to have a nice time, but don't tell me I have to be wonderful 24/7 until Jan. 1.
The interview yesterday went very well, if I can gauge success by the two hours there. I can only be on my best behavior for so long, and two hours of being upstanding was exhausting. I'm bummed by the possibility of having to accept a job that pays the same as I earned four years ago, but that seems to be what I may have to do. Somehow I'll have to pay for the car and try to get back on top of the credit cards at that pay scale. I was so close to paying them off before all this! I don't know how organizations and businesses in DC can understand how people can accept pay like that with the cost of living here. Nor do I understand how my longtime DC resident friends have succeeded here for so long. For one thing, many of them are lawyers or have partners who can support them. I guess that's why there's so few single people in this town. I'm not counting my chickens before they hatch, however. I've been at this game for too long to hold any hope. I was just thinking that by 32 having spent six years in this town, I would be 'succeeding' by my standards, which is merely to be comfortable and on top of my expenses. I don't ask to be a player and living a fast and expensive life, I just want to get by.
The integration of new studly geek into the D&D gaming group went well. Lots of flirting through their characters, the pinnacle of flirtratious gay gaming geekness:
Rohan the Mighty: "I rescue Starria from the clutches of the menacing frost giant, swiping at it with a feint of my battleaxe, hoping the giant drops Starria."
DM: "The frost giant fails his Dexterity check, dropping Starria the elf maiden."
Starria: (fluttering eyes at Gene, who plays Rohan) "My hero!"
Speaking of geekness: many of my geek friends will have already seen LOTR by Dec. 28, but the plan is to see a matinee with moi that Saturday afternoon en masse, as is tradition set by last year. You are invited, drop me a line if you want to come along. Those of you who can't make it must treat me to a viewing of Star Trek X as recompensation.
I think I'm still recovering from losing my job last week, in addition to a few other things. By Friday of last week, five out of six people with said commitments had finally called back, albeit to cancel, but Jimbo still feels like an afterthought. I think dating and trying to plan things this time of year is out of the question. Jimbo Solo. I've been in major withdrawl mode a la lone cowboy. Sorry for the distance, all of you. I'm walled up in my Fortress of Solitude, Sanctum Sanctorum, self-imposed solitary confinement (without Chris Meloni) until regeneration is complete.
Posted by jimbo at 1:21 PM | Comments (2)
December 8, 2002
corn flakes
Had a nice quiet evening last night. Went to the Lantern for a few beers and who was there but Dicktard and The Chad. Pipe-smokin' Daddy Claus arrived on a Harley, and also met up with woofy Joe.
Posted by jimbo at 11:54 AM | Comments (4)
December 7, 2002
mission accomplished
Damn, good thing I got laid off. How else would I have been able to take off from work to do three trips to the DMV? Mission accomplished, however. Next: scheduled tune-up trip to the Mazda dealer.
Workout, mop dirty floor, laundry. Green Lantern tonight to meet up with some friends.
Posted by jimbo at 5:24 PM | Comments (1)
December 6, 2002
interview monday!
Oi, my back! No back extensions or ab work required today...shoveling did quite a number on my torso. Hefting heavy snow sure does the trick.
Yee-haw! I have an interview on Monday. It's for a job being left by a teammate of mine who's leaving soon. It's a tech training position, which I should be good at considering all the English teaching and park ranger programs I did in the past. However, it doesn't promise to pay as much as a webmaster salary. I'm currently in a conundrum: take a job now that pays less ( a bird in hand ) or hold my ground and wait out ( two in the field ) for a more lucrative job? Your opinions and suggestions are welcome.
I'm workin' on some more photo galleries from this past rugby season. Here's why I'm pro-Israeli. He was a woofy PhD candidate from NYC I was chatting with at the pre-match party in NYC. And that's not red-eye from the camera flash - it's the color my eyes turn when I'm around furry chests. And here's why you should join our team.
Neighbor party tonight, and D&D on Sunday. We're bringing in a new guest player, and hopefully the geeks will behave. You would think a bunch of sci-fi/fantasy geeks would be timid and nerdy, but like anything with a penis, they're a pack of wolves who seem to forget our one standing rule in the gaming gang. No inter-geek tricking!
Off to the DC DMV again today, this time armed with every piece of personal ID and paperwork required. Wish me luck.
Posted by jimbo at 11:32 AM | Comments (7)
December 5, 2002
snow!
Posted by jimbo at 2:41 PM | Comments (3)
December 4, 2002
bury me at the DMV
The Hit List:
- Hyperactive Australian zookeepers who are unnecesarily rough with peaceful animals
- Sappy Wal-Mart commercials
- Sappy Hallmark specials
- Sensational Fox News reports
- DC snowstorm panic
I went to the remarkably efficient DC unemployment office yesterday. It never ceases to amaze me what a relatively pleasant experience it is. On the other hand, I'm going to the DC dept. of motor vehicles today. Wish me luck. My corpse can be found dessicated in line at 301 C Street, NW DC.
I called Fitz last night. Even though his blog is down, he's OK for all those concerned. There is life sans blog.
Posted by jimbo at 10:14 AM | Comments (1)
December 3, 2002
my oz bitch
Who's your OZ bitch?
Honestly, I didn't try to get Chris Meloni when I took the test.
Posted by jimbo at 12:04 PM | Comments (9)
December 2, 2002
joy to the world.
Happy Thanksgiving! Merry Christmas! I just got laid off today!
I was amazed when I wasn't laid off after the first reduction in staffing due to a decrease in incoming files, so it's not really a suprise. Things had been slow at work and it was a challenge to find things to do, even with a skeleton crew. There's a chance that I'll get hired back when things get busy again. I also have this web gig on the side that can now get finished before the holidays.
Holy Yukon! Check out Mr. Gay Alaska. I never saw nuthin' like that when I was up there.
Posted by jimbo at 6:45 PM | Comments (6)
December 1, 2002
'doh!
Kickin' myself in the head today. A goateed furry chested hottie was chatting it up with me last night at the club, but so absobed was I in shakin' it and having a good time, I neglected to give him my number. Sunday morning regrets.
But, we all had a good time. The music was pretty good and the men were stunning. Not too crowded either. That's good, as it will be a long time before another splurge like that. Less is more at Nation.
Must work on private web gig today...must focus...
Posted by jimbo at 1:51 PM | Comments (1)