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December 13, 2002
adios woofy mike
'sob!' Our woofy, smelly, hypermasculine straight teammate Mike is leaving the team to go spend time with his rugby-playin' girlfriend in Japan. Going away party is Sunday, and I must maintain my composure, lest I break down into a tearful wreck at his departure. He's sweaty, smelly, chews tobacco, drinks tremendous amounts of beer, belches a lot and scratches his balls constantly, but we love him. After releasing flatulence during practice, he'll often comment "That's a ripper!" The nail in his proverbial hetrosexual coffin was when I was in a scrum with him, and smelled the familiar putrid scent of Old Spice. No queen ever uses Old Spice. He's a breeder, end of story.
Some of the rookie gurls on the team inevitably hit on him during the post-match socials when they get sloppy drunk, and he's man enough to politely decline, or just respond "No fuckin' way!" without getting hysterical. That's so cool, and typical of the other straight guys on our team.
You may roll your eyes, as do some of the less-sagacious hangers-on in our pack, and say "Honey, puh-LEEZ! The only reason they're on your team is to get blown." On the contrary, most of the handful of breeders on our team play with us either because the practices are conveniently located, as they live in the DuPont area, or because a gay buddy of theirs asked them to come check us out. One of the founding breeder Renegades, Pat ("Daddy"), confessed to me why he played with us as opposed to PAC or some other local team. "You guys have fun, you're not too serious about it." Well, we've tried to get more 'serious' lately, but we do know how to have fun, and we have the most fabulous collection of match rugbygear in the Potomac Rugby Union. Our post-match socials are also some of the best in the league. Our team constitution, excruciatingly written by a crack team of anal-retentive lawyer gurls, is now being used by USA Rugby as a model charter. Our skills and fitness levels may need improvement, but we've got our club shit together.
I digress. Mike served as our team captain this season, and was one of the few to work so very hard to get our mojo, fitness and teammanship up to par, and we had an impressive showing this year at the end of the fall season because of it. Despite his breeder status, he's considered "one of the gurls". We'll miss you Mike! (Side note: not missing an opportunity to schmooze for a job, it was Mike's job I interviewed for on Monday. This 'lil job vulture doesn't miss a beat!)
I made it through the unemployment office yesterday in a mere three hours! Turns out my pool of money from my airport webmaster job is still there until February, which is a good thing. Went out with Gurl and Jon last night to Shirtless Men Drink Free, and had a good time. I was "squirrelly", in my own words, and had to get out of the house. Conversation heard between two geeks (who shall go unnamed) last night:
G: "So, you wanna go see Star Trek X on Wednesday?"
J: "But isn't Enterprise on that night? We can't miss Enterprise!"
Priorities, priorities.
Phone interview today for the Wisconsin Historical Society web job. Huge website, lots of potential, and very demanding. They definitely have their shit together, and I was sure to ask about the stability of the position in these changing times. It would really suck if I got there and then the position was "frozen" due to the new Governor's whims. Warning to all job seekers: ask these questions about current budget crisis and job stability. It could come back to bite you later.
Posted by jimbo at December 13, 2002 2:02 PM
Comments
Hey Jimbo - speaking of jobs - is your bus license still current? With our potential transit strike in NY, every private bus company on the East Coast has charters coming here for the private companies' employees. Since it's not a public service, but a private charter, you're not crossing a picket line either.
Anyway - just thought I'd pass that on.
Posted by: Rob at December 13, 2002 3:39 PM
word on the runyan love...he's a great guy...to be missed by all
and I echo your sentiment about the skeptics...only the securest of straight men could play with a gay team. Those questioning (or closeted) wouldn't get caught dead associating with us, and would probably join another team...like the Washington Irish!
Posted by: mike s. at December 13, 2002 4:03 PM
Rob, honey, dearie, sweetie-darling pumpkin pie. Driving a bus would be hell for me. In hell, I will be driving the travelling public on a Washington Flyer shuttle bus during rush hour on the beltway from New Carollton to Dulles airport. On the intercom John Tesh and Kenny G will be playing.
I had a CDL from when I was the camp naturalist at a bible camp, and drove noisy campers to and from their canoe trips on the Mississippi. Ask me about when the canoe trailer unhitched by itself and went swinging to and fro from the back of the bus! Sounds like another blog story...thanks for the inspiration!
Seriously though, I'm a seriously bad road-rager, and driving a bus full time would wear me thin very fast.
Posted by: jimbo at December 13, 2002 10:55 PM