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Apparently Madonna cast a spell on all of us, bringing about an Age of Chaos.

Her track “Like a Prayer” has lyrics saying “I close my eyes and I think I’m falling out of the sky.” This track tells the story of Lucifer, the Fallen Angel.

The question is: would Stevie Nicks have been a better choice as a primary spellcaster? I’ll bet Stevie could have done it on her own without the help of Cee Lo, Minaj and MIA.

Speaking of twirling divas, here’s a compilation of all the twirling costume changes from season 3 of Wonder Woman:

Check out her deluxe motocross outfit!

The ski trip was fun and I believe I only heard “We Found Love” only about 6 times which was tolerable, but they did play that LMFAO song more than I wanted to hear. It’s still stuck in my brain like a malignant brain tumor. I missed the Madonna halftime live but did catch her later on the YouTubes. She was fun and I liked the guests except for that weird ginger afro dude tightrope walking. That was out of place. And Kylie would like her 2011 Aphrodite tour dancers and props back please, thanks. Here’s a review of the show from NPR.

The snow conditions on the slopes were to be expected for the warm winter we’ve had in the region, and there was only snow on the runs but nowhere else on the mountain. Knowing snowboarding would probably suck on icy manufactured snow, I checked out those newfangled parabolic skis which did make skiing a little easer. I think it’s been like 10 years since I skiied (rather than snowboard) but I didn’t forget a thing. But I was reminded of how much I still have to learn on the ‘board so I won’t be buying a pair of skis anytime soon. I still like the snowboarding.

Later that evening at the local gay bar (12 Penny Saloon in Moosic) I tried my smooth moves on two locals from the Wilkes-Barre area but didn’t get anywhere. I apparently no longer have game and don’t know how to successfully trick anymore. Perhaps it is because I am dead inside.

That reminds me about something I’ve wanted to discuss here. I see on a lot of the youngster profiles here and there on apps and sites where they state that they are strictly on a “NO HOOKUPS” policy which I find hard to believe. Now I’m old fashioned on a lot of gay things but I don’t believe in absinence, and I have a hard time believing these 20somethings aren’t having sex. I worry that their policies will blow up in their faces and they’ll suddenly binge on sex all at once, unsafely.

I remember back in the 90s there was this sex positive movement in response to the fear of sex during the AIDS crisis. Anyone remember that? It was about teaching and doing safe sex while still having a healthy, realistic attitude about having sex. I thought it was a good idea and wonder if the kids these days have a bad attitude about sex out of ignorance. But then again I also see HIV rates increasing in that demographic and wonder if maybe they just don’t care, or possibly don’t know enough about safe sex? The safer sex education and outreach isn’t as prevalent as it was when I came out. Anyway I worry that the kids don’t like the sex, which isn’t healthy either.

Or they’re growing up fucked up if they live in Michelle Bachmann’s congressional district where 9 kids committed suicide in 2 years. Read this Rolling Stone article for more details. It’s horrifying how the school board and citizen leaders deliberately chose to dampen any discussion on orientation. Kids are coming out far earlier than they used to, and they need affirmation and support, not gag orders and ignorance. It sounds like the leaders in the Anoka region are both soulless and spineless, and it’s the kids who are paying the price.

Then I watch this documentary “Kidnapped for Christ” on Joe.My.God, where a gay kid has been sent to what amounts to a concentration camp in the Dominican Republic for “reform.” This stuff is still happening!

Reading and watching stuff like this makes me think that despite all the openness, affirmation and exposure the gays have experienced recently, that it’s almost worse for young gays these days because our opposition has also become more organized and focused as well. Even though we can (sort of) serve openly in the military and get married in some states, it’s still shitty out there for gay youth.

I’m going to SNÖ Mountain again this weekend for some snowboarding up in Pennsylvania with the same group that really, really likes Rihanna. Last year they played Rihanna’s “Only Girl (In The World)” about 2,900 times on the trip. This year I expect they’ll play “We Found Love” ft. Calvin Harris about as much but this year I’ll try to keep count to be more exacting. It’s a fun tune but leave it to the gays to overkill a song. Perhaps keeping count will help keep me sane. I’m bringing earplugs too.

Sadly I’ll be on the bus ride back when Madonna plays the Superbowl on Sunday. A Facebook acquaintance said, “Why are they surrounding the Madonna concert on Sunday with three hours of baseball?” That made me chuckle.

But if you’re on Twitter or Facebook on Sunday be warned because it’s going to be all about [deep breath]:

“MUH-donna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna!”

Speaking of purple crayons, our favorite Sybil BrettCajun has decided to co-opt my use of the term autistic when describing inexplicable behavior by gay men. I decided to start abusing the term lately too, just as the media has the last couple of years to terrify expecting mothers. It’s become the morning show buzzword to boost parental viewership, but it’s such a convenient term I decided to start using it myself. Anyway, if anyone is autistic it’s certainly BrettCajun and her 13 different personalities (including Suzanne Sugarbakker and Darth Nutria).

I have noticed the gays don’t have their iPhones out obsessively checking Grindr all the time anymore. I’m guessing the craze is over and also people may have realized how rude and/or douchey they were looking checking their Grindr while in a gay bar. Or maybe they’re scared their dick pictures will get hacked. Oopsie!

Anyway, I’m happy to see people are experiencing others in a live setting without the use of a device. It was getting unsettling there for a while and I was starting to think SkyNet had taken over the gays.

A few people have sent me this link about a new phenomenon called “Phone Stacking.” Basically when a group of people are out at a restaurant or bar they all put their phones in a stack. The first person who compulsively grabs their phone to check a text or Grindr foots the bill. I like that since very few texts are really that important that you have to check it during a meal. You’re not a EMT or a CDC fatal disease outbreak epidemiologist, are you? No you’re not. But there are still plenty of self-important people in DC who will continue to do that. But for the most part I believe people are getting better with behavior and devices. Every new invention brings with it some social situation that could be negatively affected. At the advent of the toilet seat, we had to learn when to put it up or down when we were done, depending on the household. Similarly when we all got email for the first time, many learned not to forward every. single. joke. they received in their inbox. There are a few people who forward everything they receive to a mass e-mail list but they are so few they’re endearing at this point and I just hit ‘delete’.

Anyway, where’s some fun stuff for the weekend. First a fun not-electronica Robyn mashup:

And a flying dildo invades a Russian press conference!

This is kind of amazing because dildos are fairly heavy, so it takes a lot of lift to get that thing aloft and stay horizontal like that. I’m guessing they hollowed one out or used a lighter foam cast.

Adorkable beardy guy with a great voice sings a moving arrangement of “Gabriel’s Message”

You may recall Sting’s version featured on the first “A Very Special Christmas” album released in 1987 as a benefit for the Special Olympics.

Of course I must repost my favorite holiday song “The Closing of the Year” from the “Toys” motion picture soundtrack by Wendy and Lisa featuring Seal:

36 years ago the Edmund Fitzgerald sank in Lake Superior. It was a real ship, not just a legendary song and is the largest shipwreck to occur in the Great Lakes.

The song has many references to geography I’m familiar with, and the artist Gordon Lightfoot has a history of being a bit of a broody fellow. But for a time he was quite the woofy ginger.

So earlier this week I had joined in on a Facebook discussion about the new Sound of Arrows album that’s out (it’s pretty good). And from the discussion I was accused of having a continued interest in “indie” music. I cringed at the tought, because whenever I hear someone espousing their love for “indie” music they usually smell bad and have a severe case of Smarty Pants. As in they’re usually irritating and insufferable music snobs. And I don’t want that label (because I’m so “indie” and we eschew labels).

That said, I do like a lot of acts on independent record labels, and like Sound of Arrows it just so happens that many of them are from Sweden. Not that I’m racist or anything. It should also be noted that “music” has been an archived category on this blog for almost a decade, and I did just fly to L.A. to see Robyn (well, and Dingo too). So maybe I am enthusiastic about music. But I vow to never don a pair of thick-rimmed hipster glasses no matter who I listen to.

That said my music has still got to have vocals, and it tends toward the pop-vibe in the Major chord. I still loves me some Janet, Sting and Madonna even though they’re all slowly transforming into Gollum independently of each other.

Anyway, I’m currently gushing over these two tracks which are on heavy rotation on my iPod:

Sound of Arrows – Wonder

M83 – Midnight City

I think the videos for both songs are very well done, even though telekinetic mutant kids don’t really have much to do with driving in the city.

My first trip to Los Angeles, California was a blast due in great part to the lovely hosting of Dingo. He took me everywhere and then some. I had totally forgotten about the La Brea Tar Pits and I liked that the most – I’m totally into giant mammals and the Pleistocene era.

Dingo took me on a surprise visit to an estate sale of a falling star who was somehow related to Michael Jackson’s Thriller album. Let’s just say it was an eye-opener and a life lesson. I would take from that experience that most of us get a single golden moment in our lives, and it’s what you do with the rest of your life that eventually matters more.

I also enjoyed sipping fruity drinks at The Tonga Hut, L.A.’s Original Tiki Bar, established in 1958. I had to resist the urge to start doing the Haka after a few drinks, but that might have frightened Dingo and the other bar patrons. Congrats to the All-Blacks on their World Cup win by the way.

Another treat was dining from The Nom Nom Truck, a specialty food truck:

We need more food trucks like this in DC.

I got my wish and we went to The Pan-Pacific Recreation Center, with a replica architectural feature from the Pan-Pacific Auditorium, where the epic motion picture Xanadu was filmed:

I could feel the streamers of ambient radiance streaming from my behind as we left.

Later on we went to the Griffith Observatory which was recently remodeled for additional space. The guy giving our planetarium presentation was certainly well versed in orating with flair and drama. His delivery wasn’t dry like the usual museum presentation and kept us awake. I wonder if he wasn’t a former actor or maybe the planetarium interpretive staff gets drama training once in a while since it is L.A. after all. One of the exhibits showed you how gay you were on a rainbow scale:

The view from the observatory showed how bad the smog was that weekend:

I had to freebase decongestants the whole time I was there as I turned into a snot factory. Apparently I’m OK with the extreme pollen and mold here in the Mid-Atlantic, but not so good with smog.

The main reason for my trip was to go to the Robyn concert at the Hollywood Bowl, featuring Royskopp as the opening act. I wasn’t so keen on Royskopp, but Robyn didn’t disappoint, and the light show was pretty impressive too:

Does anyone remember Waremouse, a former DC blogger? He lives in the L.A. area now, and got the tickets and it was good to hang out with him too. He says hi. I met Waremouse and Dingo through this blog, and it was a reminder that while blogging may be going by the wayside, I’ve met a lot of cool people because of it.

On the way to a fine whiskey bar called Seven Grand we stopped at the Bradbury Building where the 1982 sci-fi film Blade Runner was filmed. Here I am pretending to be Harrison Ford hunting down replicants:

I must mention the flight to L.A. was pretty cool too, with stunning views of desert landforms in Colorado and Utah, and I think this was the Grand Canyon:

I also flew over Death Valley, and there was a whole lot of nothing out there, but still pretty spectacular in a barren way.

Next trip: Dallas, Texas for the Hellfest rugby tournament!

OMGOMGOMG ! ! ! SKWEEEEEE ! ! !

I’m flying out to Los Angeles this coming weekend to see Robyn and Röyksopp perform at the Hollywood Bowl. I’m expecting the venue to be like Wolf Trap but without the Virginia humidity. It should be fun and I’ve never been to L.A. before. I heard tha bitchazz out there don’t eat so I stopped eating a few weeks ago and now I can almost see my iliac furrow. Although all those dark chocolate M&Ms consumed at last night’s Dark Sun Dungeons and Dragons game may have hidden my belt again.

I’m also going to hang out with my lovely host Dingo the Aqua Pup and possibly go to a venue called Skakbar the night before the concert. Other bucket list items include visiting the Pan-Pacific Park where there is a replica of the legendary Pan-Pacific Auditorium where some parts of the epic motion picture Xanadu were filmed. Sadly, the original auditorium fell into decay and eventually burned down.

Dingo and I will also go shopping for men’s speciality underwear, and may also compete in a wicked voguing contest. But they just don’t do it out there on the West coast like we do over here in the east:

Anyone remember Meshell Ndegeocello? She had that hit “Wild Night” duet with John Mellencamp, and was one of the first people signed to Madonna’s ‘Maverick’ record label. Last Thursday I went to see her out at Virginia’s State Theatre for her Gett Off: Meshell Ndegeocello covers Prince tour. She and her extremely talented band covered those obscure geeky Prince B-sides and weird unreleased tracks from Prince’s first 5 albums and it was incredible. If she comes through your town and you know a few of those tracks like “Annie Christian,” “Something in the Water (Does Not Compute),” “Irresistible Bitch,” “Sexuality,” and “Lady Cabdriver” you need to see this show.

It rained cats and dogs as we left the theatre, which turned out to be a theme for the rest of the weekend. The next day I headed out with a small group out to the wilds of West Virginia for some backpacking and camping.

On the drive up we rescued this female eastern box turtle who was taking her time crossing the forest road:

We got her to the other side of the road and kept ascending the mountains.

The weather forecasts called for a good chance of rain which we ignored and got rained on anyway. The two other guys had one tent but the owner of the tent forgot to check it before the trip and only packed poles and a rain fly – but no tent. With some tents it’s possible to set up the rain fly with the poles, but that wasn’t the case with this tent and we still hoped the rain wouldn’t be too bad. But it was cats and dogs early Saturday morning and they both got significantly wet. My tent’s rainfly seeped a little but I was otherwise dry and as soon as I got up in the morning they were like “We’re going back.” Which was OK with me as it’s no fun looking forward to a night in a wet sleeping bag for anyone.

On the way down the mountain we spotted these goats, but couldn’t figure out what that wooden device is around this goat’s neck. Is it the wooden Frame of Shame?

One of the guys had a friend with a summer house (much larger than a dacha) on the way back from WV so we stayed there Saturday night. Turns out it was basically a chateau-design home on top of the mountain and we had showers and cocktails, not a bad alternative to pouring rain. It was so quiet there I had trouble getting to sleep at night, as I’m so accustomed to the constant din of the city.

Here’s a photo of the counter at Ten Ren Tea in College Park, MD. I go there to get bubble tea, and I like this photo I took because it’s so busy. Look at all the messages being directed at you in the photo:

There’s a lot going on in the photo.

And here’s a cute photo by M.V. Janzen of a het couple getting their wedding picture taken at the DuPont Circle fountain while the DC gay Pride Parade was going on:

I’d like to see how their photos turned out.

Kid Vogues in ‘91: the kid’s parents should not have been surprised when he came out:

Jack In A Box – the story of (yet another) neurotic Bear in NYC:

I can sort of relate.

It’s rumored that “Half-Share” is to be a series, but I don’t know on what channel. I think it would make a nice movie but a series would get tiresome fast:

The crew I stayed with when I was on Fire Island wasn’t so intense, but there were more militantly gay houseshares that are certainly like that.

So they’re making a Fraggle Rock Movie and BabyDaddy and Jake Shears from Scissor Sisters are doing the music! This is too much good news in one article and I can barely contain myself from exploding with Muppet nerdiness. The Sisters have performed with Muppet-like creatures before.

This coming weekend I’m going backpacking with a bunch of friends to the Dolly Sods Wilderness in the Monongahela National Forest. I would provide an official link but the U.S. Forest Service website has such ridiculously long URLs for some really lame reason that I refuse to link to it out of good website design principle.

While I had not planned it that way, the trip will be on the weekend of Father’s Day, a holiday that originated in the same region I will be hiking.

Anyway, while I was looking at maps I came across this interesting Google satellite map of Seven Bends State Park in Woodstock, VA. Zoom out a bit and look at how the rivers squiggle, with Detrick on a ridge in between. I want to road trip there some day soon.