High Heel Racing Tips from Charlene Hilton

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Washington DC's 20th Annual High Heel RaceCharlene Hilton will not be joining us tonight for the Annual 17th Street High Heel Race, but she e-mailed me with some tips to share for tonight's runners. This morning's Washington Post Express quoted some professional trainer, but he doesn't know what the hell he's talking about, and Charlene needed to set the record straight:

  1. No gowns, no crinoline, and no hoop dresses. This isn't a Gone With The Wind LARP, it's a race. Stick with a sassy cocktail dress made of stretchy material.

  2. Don't stop for anything. Heels aren't designed for deceleration, and you will wipe out if you try to slow down or stop. You can't stop until you cross that finish line.

  3. Jump! Be prepared to leap over drag queen pile-ups, because you can't slow down or weave around them or you'll wipe out.

  4. It's important to point out that sprinters run on their toes anyway, so the misconception that you can't be fast in heels is just plain wrong. While you won't be able to stop, there's nothing keeping you from running as fast as Carl Lewis.

  5. Work it. Booger drag is a hoot, but you're going to be prancing with the best, so prepare to be fierce!

  6. Be drunk. The founding sisters of this event were trashed when they ran from JRs to Cobalt. You must honor that tradition. A discreet lady's flask in your purse is allowed, and of course sauce up during pre-race preparations.

  7. Pit crew. You'll need some friends to hold your purse, fix your hair and hold you up after you finish. It's actually hard work to prance around and run in heels if you haven't been training for it.

  8. And most of all have fun!

Washington DC's 20th Annual High Heel Race
Top right photo by Gurl, photo at bottom by Joe Tresh.

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Donald said:

That's the first time I've heard 'booger drag' since I moved up here from Georgia, and it's made me very happy.

brettcajun said:

HA HA! This is the first time I have seen Charlene run!!! Was she chasing down a rich Washington lobbyist? This pic made me smile LOTS.

HSimpson said:

I have never noticed it before, but Charlene must be working for FedEx. Just look at that package in the first picture!

rusty,out on the factory floor said:

Wow, Miss Hilton has some serious calf muscles. Does she often sprint down the street from bar to bar or just on special occasions?

henry said:

Not to denigrate Ms. Hilton, but them ain't no heels she's running in/on. Your average angertwink club boots will give you better elevation! Isn's there a "minimum inches' requirement? Size does matter!

Veronica said:

Charlene's beauty and look is timeless ... you work it still today!

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