I like 'em a little beefy, maybe even a bit chunky

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ScoreboardBen.jpgWhile I am loathe to link to that blog that has never reciprocated a mutual link, I must draw your attention to that blog's recent entry about my future husband Ben Cohen.

However, I am concerned about Ben. He's starting to become "ripped" and I don't like that look on him. I like my rugby-playin' Ben with a 'lil bit of something to hold onto. I'm not talking morbidly obese, just not emaciated like how Seann Scott and Ryan Reynolds have become lately - more like how Scott Caan has been looking , you know? Anyway, I'm off to make a sandwich for Ben because he's looking too skinny.

The sad thing is here in gay DC if you mention you like that sort of thing on guys, everyone assumes you're into morbidly obese guys because in DC there is no in-between, only extremes. And when I mentioned how I liked that look on one particular date he ran away and cryed himself to sleep. Apparently I crushed his self-esteem for months after that. Sorry, but I think it looks good on you, but next time I'll just say "I think you're attractive" because we are not allowed to express our true feelings or thoughts to other gays in DC, only the most diplomatic and inoffensive statements are allowed else psyches are devastated.

Besides, if you are a normal person with a normal work/life schedule, you may not be able to maintain that ripped look. Sure, some gays do, often from a strict low-carb diet and full exercise schedule, but keep in mind not everyone defines that as perfection. But I'm ripped like that right now because I've been moving and packing shit every day and am out of food and stressed out so I'm totally starving but at least I'm ripped and I won't cry myself to sleep tonight. I'll just be awake from starvation. Come to think of it, the only other time I've ever been ripped was when I was unemployed, depressed from a breakup and totally stressing about paying rent. So in that case that healthy ripped look wasn't necessarily an indicator of mental health.

Season 3 of Isabella Rossellini's 'Green Porno' is out, more clever and educational than ever. These video shorts about sex in the natural world are funny and highly informative.

Like salmon, eels from Europe's freshwater streams go out to sea to spawn. But scientists could only guess where they went. But recent innovations in tracking technology may solve this old anadromous mystery.

9 Comments

Sean said:

At least he's not waxing his chest. I'd have to let him go if that ever started...

Donald said:

Ben Cohen was sitting here beside me as I read your post, Ben read over my shoulder like he always does, and we both think it's so cute how you refer to Ben as your future husband. And then I fed him pringles and onion dip.

Richard said:

I am perhaps not the student of Mr. Cohen that you are, Jim, but I've always thought of him as being on the trim side. In fact, when I saw this layout on TR, I said, "Hmm. Benjamin's filling out. Me likey."

On a related note: how do you feel about polygamy?

dumbek said:

I'm becoming more "in between" every day. Ben's still stunningly beautiful - just in a different way. I like to pretend there are two of him. mmmmm....

Phil said:

Poor old Ben , now it's my turn to pass comment ! Love the body mate but loose some of the hair on the top and grow some stubble on the chops , perfect !
Do hope he's not reading this , me passing comment on his appearance was the reason our long term relationship came to an end 'sniff' i blame myself entirely , of course .

Russ said:

It's a total indicator as to how stressed I am whether I am "ripped" or not. And, recently, I have an 8 pack. Hopefully when the economy rights itself, I'll get comfortable, hairy, and chunky again. :)

Ed said:

I think I carry off morbidly obese well. Not saying everyone should embrace the carbs, I am just at peace with them.

Ray said:

So for me to be ripped all I need is some stress? This is all new information for me, I should just quit my job and see how long it'll take for me to get a new one.

As for Ben, he's hot and it'd be great to have a husband that doesn't mind having chocolate chip cookies in the house once in a while.

Jason said:

Cool link on eels, though, quick comment on your natural history: eels are the exact opposite of salmon. While salmon are anadromous (returning to freshwater to spawn), freshwater eels, such as these, that return to the see to reproduce are called "catadromous" (similar to the distinction between cations and anions).

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